LGBT Fiction Recommendations
Started in 2013, this is an index of all the LGBT books I've read in my quest for the best. Feel free to recommend books that you don't see here. Please note that I'm picky and you should take my ratings with a grain of salt! If there's a book with a premise that interests you, please do try it out for yourself. Most of these are M/M focused, with some gender variant books sprinkled about. Newly read books are added to the top with dates showing when I completed them.
rating system:
☆☆☆☆☆ - irredeemable.
★☆☆☆☆ - not worth my time, but might be worth someone else’s.
★★☆☆☆ - good idea, poor execution.
★★★☆☆ - average. a good read.
★★★★☆ - slightly above average. not perfect, but still a good time overall.
★★★★★ - utterly enjoyable from start to finish. exquisite.
- personal fave, i took an extra special liking to this book regardless of flaws or hiccups.
[07/11/2023]
The Stone Prince ★★★★☆ by Fiona Patton - M/M Fantasy
The royal line of Branion have been blessed, or cursed, with the power of the Flame. If called upon by one untrained or unworthy the Flame is as likely to destroy its human vessel as whatever foe it has been unleashed against. Yet even the Flame is less dangerous than Melesandra the Third, the unyielding and terrifying ruler of Branion. No one understands this better than Crown Prince Demnor, who is convinced he is his mother's most-treasured victim.
This one won't be for everyone. The pacing is often slow and the characters confusing, as everyone who matters has 20 different titles used interchangeably and without regard for gender (prince + duke are used for women as well as men). But I like dense, complicated, bloody military / political fantasy and this scratched just about every one of my itches: rich and insanely detailed worldbuilding, vast and thoughtful descriptions of castles that felt too real and too big to be contained on the pages that conjured them, gruesomely detailed battles full of blood and nausea and inner conflict, elaborate family feuds, fantasy religions with huge presence and involvement in societal structures, a devoted gay lover for whom our tortured and deeply angry heir will do anything to keep by his side, women in equal positions of power and battle involvment, politics politics politics, and sometimes, if we’re lucky, dragons.
I only wish, for the sake of my sanity, that there was a character roster at the end with each character’s title(s) and familial relations listed, as modern books tend to include sometimes. This is the one time where it would have actually helped me a lot, and saved me from flipping back and forth trying to remember a dozen different characters about a hundred different times.
Regardless, this is the first time I think I've truly understood the phrase 'I would read x author's shopping list', because even when it got really dense I was suprised by how consistently fluid the writing felt, and how deeply even the more mundane or slower moments gripped me. The writing quality only took a slight dip in the end with a few typos and pacing discrepancies, but not enough to alter my overall enjoyment.
Full disclosure that I did take a several month break halfway through because I was getting very attached to the characters and feared it wasn't heading toward a happy or gay ending, but I'm happy to say I couldn't have been more wrong about that, and the journey made it all the more sweeter. It was an honor to experience this one.
The Stone Prince ★★★★☆ by Fiona Patton - M/M Fantasy
The royal line of Branion have been blessed, or cursed, with the power of the Flame. If called upon by one untrained or unworthy the Flame is as likely to destroy its human vessel as whatever foe it has been unleashed against. Yet even the Flame is less dangerous than Melesandra the Third, the unyielding and terrifying ruler of Branion. No one understands this better than Crown Prince Demnor, who is convinced he is his mother's most-treasured victim.
This one won't be for everyone. The pacing is often slow and the characters confusing, as everyone who matters has 20 different titles used interchangeably and without regard for gender (prince + duke are used for women as well as men). But I like dense, complicated, bloody military / political fantasy and this scratched just about every one of my itches: rich and insanely detailed worldbuilding, vast and thoughtful descriptions of castles that felt too real and too big to be contained on the pages that conjured them, gruesomely detailed battles full of blood and nausea and inner conflict, elaborate family feuds, fantasy religions with huge presence and involvement in societal structures, a devoted gay lover for whom our tortured and deeply angry heir will do anything to keep by his side, women in equal positions of power and battle involvment, politics politics politics, and sometimes, if we’re lucky, dragons.
I only wish, for the sake of my sanity, that there was a character roster at the end with each character’s title(s) and familial relations listed, as modern books tend to include sometimes. This is the one time where it would have actually helped me a lot, and saved me from flipping back and forth trying to remember a dozen different characters about a hundred different times.
Regardless, this is the first time I think I've truly understood the phrase 'I would read x author's shopping list', because even when it got really dense I was suprised by how consistently fluid the writing felt, and how deeply even the more mundane or slower moments gripped me. The writing quality only took a slight dip in the end with a few typos and pacing discrepancies, but not enough to alter my overall enjoyment.
Full disclosure that I did take a several month break halfway through because I was getting very attached to the characters and feared it wasn't heading toward a happy or gay ending, but I'm happy to say I couldn't have been more wrong about that, and the journey made it all the more sweeter. It was an honor to experience this one.
[06/21/2023]
Spring in Siberia ★★★★☆ by Artem Mozgovoy - Coming-of-Age, Gay MC
1985. Russia. As the Soviet Union disintegrates and Western capitalism spreads its grip across their land, the Morozov family finds itself consigned to the remote, icy wastes of Siberia. It is here that their only child, Alexey, is born.
Spring in Siberia changed me on a molecular level, for better or for worse.
The author himself is a gay journalist who left russia in 2011 and it certainly gives the feeling of writing from experience in some instances. This is the story about a kid who grows up in siberia during the collapse of the soviet union, of ambiguous sexuality (and gender if you ask me), and how he survives the isolation of a society that has no place for people like him.
I was really surprised by the level of history interwoven into the story. Some parts do come off a little textbooky but I don’t mean that in a bad way. I think it's important to have certain facts stated when so much pravda in russia has been obscured, destroyed, buried, and violently erased. It’s not a dry read by any means, either. It's poetic and emotional and personal and honest. It’s relevant and critical.
I know a lot of people don’t want to have any sympathy for russians right now, and I get it, I don’t think this book aims to make you feel like you have to feel that way either. but I think it’s important to understand how things became the way they are, to see how far back the propaganda machine runs, how many generations it has in its grip, and how even if putin drops dead tomorrow there will be no easy fix. It’s a tough read, and i’m not sure if hopeful is even a good word to describe it (as it does on the back cover). But it’s good. It may be a long time yet before we get happy/hopeful gay russian romances (from russian authors) but i’m thankful for this book’s existence. Even if it made me feel like I was being torn limb from limb. There are those of us who can make it out and craft beautiful works. In memory, in spite, with love. maybe that’s where the real hope is.
Spring in Siberia ★★★★☆ by Artem Mozgovoy - Coming-of-Age, Gay MC
1985. Russia. As the Soviet Union disintegrates and Western capitalism spreads its grip across their land, the Morozov family finds itself consigned to the remote, icy wastes of Siberia. It is here that their only child, Alexey, is born.
Spring in Siberia changed me on a molecular level, for better or for worse.
The author himself is a gay journalist who left russia in 2011 and it certainly gives the feeling of writing from experience in some instances. This is the story about a kid who grows up in siberia during the collapse of the soviet union, of ambiguous sexuality (and gender if you ask me), and how he survives the isolation of a society that has no place for people like him.
I was really surprised by the level of history interwoven into the story. Some parts do come off a little textbooky but I don’t mean that in a bad way. I think it's important to have certain facts stated when so much pravda in russia has been obscured, destroyed, buried, and violently erased. It’s not a dry read by any means, either. It's poetic and emotional and personal and honest. It’s relevant and critical.
I know a lot of people don’t want to have any sympathy for russians right now, and I get it, I don’t think this book aims to make you feel like you have to feel that way either. but I think it’s important to understand how things became the way they are, to see how far back the propaganda machine runs, how many generations it has in its grip, and how even if putin drops dead tomorrow there will be no easy fix. It’s a tough read, and i’m not sure if hopeful is even a good word to describe it (as it does on the back cover). But it’s good. It may be a long time yet before we get happy/hopeful gay russian romances (from russian authors) but i’m thankful for this book’s existence. Even if it made me feel like I was being torn limb from limb. There are those of us who can make it out and craft beautiful works. In memory, in spite, with love. maybe that’s where the real hope is.
[05/10/2023]
The Stark Divide ★★★☆☆ by J. Scott Coatsworth - Scifi Fantasy, Gay and Trans MCs
Three living generation ships have been built with a combination of genetic mastery, artificial intelligence, technology, and raw materials harvested from the asteroid belt. This is the story of one of them—43 Ariadne, or Forever, as her inhabitants call her—a living world that carries the remaining hopes of humanity, and the three generations of scientists, engineers, and explorers working to colonize her.
I liked it, but I wish i could have liked it more. Conceptually there are a lot of really cool things going on. How many scifis about generational ships have horses? AIs with organic hearts? S heavy focus on natural elements and primitive survival skills as a safeguard against disastrous over-reliance on tech? Not to mention the author’s whole deal of casually (but firmly) queerifiying scifi.
But this whole thing really could have used a better editor. Not only to fix continuity issues like a character’s hair color changing from dark to inexplicably blond, a completely wrong name on the map, and the wrong form of a slavic character’s last name, but to help shape it into something better overall because there’s so much potential here. And it had such a strong start! I really felt the potential for this to be one of my favorite queer scifis ever. But parts 2 + 3 felt like they took massive steps back, mostly in terms of dialogue. A lot of it felt generic and even unnecessary. It was clean and idealized, almost characterless, which is unfortunate when the first part felt so (problematically, messily, interestingly) human.
Now I need to dip into spoiler territory for this paragraph because it bothered me that we barely knew anything about Colin’s lifelong gay lover. Even without any romance I would have liked to know more about the guy instead of having him as an extremely distant and vague presence the entire time. Probably my biggest issue however is the instance where a character refers to a refugee camp as a literal “cancer on the land, the virgin territory of [ship’s name]”, when the entire reason for the camp’s inhumane state is a direct result of governmental neglect. It’s a bit... tonedeaf? Especially coming from the ‘good savior’ character sent to sort out the camp. Especially when, later, hundreds of other emergency colonists are suddenly forced into the same system, they’re given instant access to communal mess halls and temp housing programs that were available all along but never repurposed to help with the refugee influx. Like, okay. Sure buddy. And we’re never going to talk about the disconnect there? Not even going to address it? Not even going to have a list of the refugees’ names after weeks of mismanagement? Cool. You could frame this in a way that comments on how real refugee camps are run and how migrants from different origins are treated vastly different from each other, but it blows my mind that there is none of that. It’s all given at face value with zero narrative legwork and this presentation doesn’t sit well with me.
Overall I think coatsworth has good intentions with this story, and some genuinely fascinating ideas. But man looking at the downward slope of my enjoyment makes me sad. Also if you're reading this for the trans character, he only comes in at part 3 and had some frankly confusing medical transition descriptions.
The Stark Divide ★★★☆☆ by J. Scott Coatsworth - Scifi Fantasy, Gay and Trans MCs
Three living generation ships have been built with a combination of genetic mastery, artificial intelligence, technology, and raw materials harvested from the asteroid belt. This is the story of one of them—43 Ariadne, or Forever, as her inhabitants call her—a living world that carries the remaining hopes of humanity, and the three generations of scientists, engineers, and explorers working to colonize her.
I liked it, but I wish i could have liked it more. Conceptually there are a lot of really cool things going on. How many scifis about generational ships have horses? AIs with organic hearts? S heavy focus on natural elements and primitive survival skills as a safeguard against disastrous over-reliance on tech? Not to mention the author’s whole deal of casually (but firmly) queerifiying scifi.
But this whole thing really could have used a better editor. Not only to fix continuity issues like a character’s hair color changing from dark to inexplicably blond, a completely wrong name on the map, and the wrong form of a slavic character’s last name, but to help shape it into something better overall because there’s so much potential here. And it had such a strong start! I really felt the potential for this to be one of my favorite queer scifis ever. But parts 2 + 3 felt like they took massive steps back, mostly in terms of dialogue. A lot of it felt generic and even unnecessary. It was clean and idealized, almost characterless, which is unfortunate when the first part felt so (problematically, messily, interestingly) human.
Now I need to dip into spoiler territory for this paragraph because it bothered me that we barely knew anything about Colin’s lifelong gay lover. Even without any romance I would have liked to know more about the guy instead of having him as an extremely distant and vague presence the entire time. Probably my biggest issue however is the instance where a character refers to a refugee camp as a literal “cancer on the land, the virgin territory of [ship’s name]”, when the entire reason for the camp’s inhumane state is a direct result of governmental neglect. It’s a bit... tonedeaf? Especially coming from the ‘good savior’ character sent to sort out the camp. Especially when, later, hundreds of other emergency colonists are suddenly forced into the same system, they’re given instant access to communal mess halls and temp housing programs that were available all along but never repurposed to help with the refugee influx. Like, okay. Sure buddy. And we’re never going to talk about the disconnect there? Not even going to address it? Not even going to have a list of the refugees’ names after weeks of mismanagement? Cool. You could frame this in a way that comments on how real refugee camps are run and how migrants from different origins are treated vastly different from each other, but it blows my mind that there is none of that. It’s all given at face value with zero narrative legwork and this presentation doesn’t sit well with me.
Overall I think coatsworth has good intentions with this story, and some genuinely fascinating ideas. But man looking at the downward slope of my enjoyment makes me sad. Also if you're reading this for the trans character, he only comes in at part 3 and had some frankly confusing medical transition descriptions.
[04/27/2023]
A Million Quiet Revolutions ★★★☆☆ by Robin Gow - YA Contemporary Poetry with Trans MCs
A modern love story told in verse, this contemporary YA novel is about two trans boys who write each other letters, inspired by trans soldiers who were in love during the Revolutionary War.
If you've been on my page for more than 2 seconds you know how I feel about YA. This one intrigued me becuase of its concept - a T4T novel told entirely in verse. And it was fine. There were certain points where I wasn't sure if I was enjoying it but I really liked a big chunk of the end and the overall message of writing ourselves into history.
I find it difficult to read about trans teens because of my own complicated history, but I would recommend it to other trans youth (because it Gets It, with all the angst of teenage love and gender crisises) and maaaybe family members of trans kids (because it goes into common concerns expressed by cis parents like worrying about the safety of your kid, and it ends on a hopeful note). It is a bit basic though (as YA tends to be), so there are definitely more interesting books for trans adults with more nuanced / interesting portrayals of transgenderism out there than this.
A Million Quiet Revolutions ★★★☆☆ by Robin Gow - YA Contemporary Poetry with Trans MCs
A modern love story told in verse, this contemporary YA novel is about two trans boys who write each other letters, inspired by trans soldiers who were in love during the Revolutionary War.
If you've been on my page for more than 2 seconds you know how I feel about YA. This one intrigued me becuase of its concept - a T4T novel told entirely in verse. And it was fine. There were certain points where I wasn't sure if I was enjoying it but I really liked a big chunk of the end and the overall message of writing ourselves into history.
I find it difficult to read about trans teens because of my own complicated history, but I would recommend it to other trans youth (because it Gets It, with all the angst of teenage love and gender crisises) and maaaybe family members of trans kids (because it goes into common concerns expressed by cis parents like worrying about the safety of your kid, and it ends on a hopeful note). It is a bit basic though (as YA tends to be), so there are definitely more interesting books for trans adults with more nuanced / interesting portrayals of transgenderism out there than this.
[04/02/2023]
Bound in Flesh: An Anthology of Trans Body Horror ★★★★☆ by Lor Gislason with LC von Hessen, Theo Hendrie, Derek Des Agnes, Winter Holmes, Gaast, Charles-Elizabeth Boyle, Layne Van Rensburg, Amanda M. Blake, Lillian Boyd, Taliesin Neith, Hailey Piper, Joe Koch, Bitter Karella - Trans Horror
This anthology brings together 13 trans and non-binary writers, using horror to both explore the darkest depths of the genre and the boundaries of flesh.
This anthology is awesome. I'm not someone who usually enjoys short story collections because there's always a few stories that don't hit as well as the others. But having read a body horror novella by a trans author in the past I knew there would be something unique and creative to find here. And this ended up being so much better than I even expected.
It's impossible to pick a single favorite story because I could go on about what think is great about almost every single one of them. In the interest of keeping this concise I wanted to limit myself to picking three favorites, but this collection is just too good for that. So here are my top 5:
Wormspace - For setting the tone and making me feel genuinely disturbed from the get go, which made me wildly curious about the rest of the stories. The tension of the buildup really makes this my favorite choice for an opening. Coming Out - For its startling quality. This is the point where I really thought okay, this collection is something special. I loved the structure of this story, the attention to its telling, and the details in the omissions that forced my brain to meet the horrors halfway. Long Fingers - For quote-worthy paragraphs and an energy that made me feel excited to be trans, and for showing me that horror can be heartwarming when read by the monster. A Brief History of The Santa Carcossa Archipelago - For getting weird with it. For mixing horror and sex in a way that felt nauseating and sweet at the same time, and oddly comforting. And I'm always a sucker for science. Looking for the Big Death - For being a strong finish that really ramped up the horror and wrapped the anthology up in a memorable, exhilerating way. This was probably the story that disturbed me the most and I couldn't ask for a more satisfying end to this lovely gruesome collection.
The only story I disliked was The Haunting of Aiden Finch because it felt like it didn't really meet the theme of body horror to me. The quality didn't feel on the same level as the others, especially following Wormspace, and that's why I can't really give this a 5 stars. Maybe if the horror was more involved with the bodies of the characters and less relegated to a seperate entity it could have worked for me. But as it is it felt out of place and just didn't click with me.
Overall I'm surprised by how much I loved this collection. It makes me excited for the future of queer horror and grateful to be at a point where trans writers can get together to form works of art like this.
Bound in Flesh: An Anthology of Trans Body Horror ★★★★☆ by Lor Gislason with LC von Hessen, Theo Hendrie, Derek Des Agnes, Winter Holmes, Gaast, Charles-Elizabeth Boyle, Layne Van Rensburg, Amanda M. Blake, Lillian Boyd, Taliesin Neith, Hailey Piper, Joe Koch, Bitter Karella - Trans Horror
This anthology brings together 13 trans and non-binary writers, using horror to both explore the darkest depths of the genre and the boundaries of flesh.
This anthology is awesome. I'm not someone who usually enjoys short story collections because there's always a few stories that don't hit as well as the others. But having read a body horror novella by a trans author in the past I knew there would be something unique and creative to find here. And this ended up being so much better than I even expected.
It's impossible to pick a single favorite story because I could go on about what think is great about almost every single one of them. In the interest of keeping this concise I wanted to limit myself to picking three favorites, but this collection is just too good for that. So here are my top 5:
Wormspace - For setting the tone and making me feel genuinely disturbed from the get go, which made me wildly curious about the rest of the stories. The tension of the buildup really makes this my favorite choice for an opening. Coming Out - For its startling quality. This is the point where I really thought okay, this collection is something special. I loved the structure of this story, the attention to its telling, and the details in the omissions that forced my brain to meet the horrors halfway. Long Fingers - For quote-worthy paragraphs and an energy that made me feel excited to be trans, and for showing me that horror can be heartwarming when read by the monster. A Brief History of The Santa Carcossa Archipelago - For getting weird with it. For mixing horror and sex in a way that felt nauseating and sweet at the same time, and oddly comforting. And I'm always a sucker for science. Looking for the Big Death - For being a strong finish that really ramped up the horror and wrapped the anthology up in a memorable, exhilerating way. This was probably the story that disturbed me the most and I couldn't ask for a more satisfying end to this lovely gruesome collection.
The only story I disliked was The Haunting of Aiden Finch because it felt like it didn't really meet the theme of body horror to me. The quality didn't feel on the same level as the others, especially following Wormspace, and that's why I can't really give this a 5 stars. Maybe if the horror was more involved with the bodies of the characters and less relegated to a seperate entity it could have worked for me. But as it is it felt out of place and just didn't click with me.
Overall I'm surprised by how much I loved this collection. It makes me excited for the future of queer horror and grateful to be at a point where trans writers can get together to form works of art like this.
[03/24/2023]
Silent Reading ★★★★☆ by Priest - M/M Contemporary Mystery
Silent Reading ★★★★☆ by Priest - M/M Contemporary Mystery
content warning(s):
Child abuse, domestic violence, animal abuse, suicide and attempted suicide, graphic depictions of violence, intense bullying, psychological manipulation, referenced self-harm, referenced sexual assault and child sexual assault, referenced drug use, referenced forced prostitution
Childhood, upbringing, family background, social connections, traumas... We are simply looking for a just answer for ourselves — and for all those who still have hope for this world.
Silent Reading is split into 5 parts with each part focusing on its own criminal case with some overlapping elements as Luo Wenzhou strives to solve the truth behind complex cases, sometimes helped by the infuriating rich prettyboy Fei Du.
This is definitely one of the darker stories I've read but despite that, after finishing Silent Reading I was left with feelings of deeprooted hope and a drive to live life to the fullest. The romance was refreshing with the level of communication and active work that both parties commit to the relationship, and none of the conflict ever has anything to do with their sexualities. While there were many moments of conflict in the relationship that would in many books be used to seperate the characters for a while (ie one character gets angry and storms out, the resolution is then delayed and muddled and drawn out for drama), Luo Wenzhou and Fei Du instead keep trying. They try to make it work even when they've reached their breaking points. They chose not to let go, even when its painful or awkward or stressful. Even when it means prying their own hearts open again and again and the resolution is that much more intense and impactful for it.
But their relationship is only one facet of the story.
Trauma is a central focus of the story. Namely what life looks like after trauma. Among all the dark cases, the crimes, the pain, the endless victims and sorrow it urges, patiently but firmly, that there exists a life beyond trauma. You may never be the same person you were before the event or circumstance that changed your life. You almost certainly won’t be the same again. The pain might be with you forever. It can change your brain chemistry and your personality and color every other thought you have.
But trauma doesn’t have to rule you if you choose to rule it.
The way Silent Reading shows and talks about trauma frequently made me want to go for long walks and cry about it and know I’ll be okay even if I am very much not okay. Something about the choice to keep going is already more than enough and that those who may act abnormally due to trauma are not burdens but are in fact people worthy of love because love is patience and understanding and care and even though trauma can twist the world into appearing as a much scarier place than it is, there really are good people in it who will love you with patience and understanding and care. Your mind has already been shaped once, your entire life uprooted. Who’s to say it can’t change again, in a better direction, on your terms?
Silent Reading tells us all of this. It reminds us to hope, that sincerity can work miracles. It’s a reminder to have faith in yourself – your strength, your inner light, and your future. It paints a picture of recovery that is messy and painful and so very difficult. Recovery is endless. It can be a blind leap of faith and you may get burned many more times on the road. But the only way to experience a better life is to keep moving forward.
That's what made it so special to me. I'm only knocking off a star for an off-color SA joke, and because things got a little confusing in part 5. Aside from that, one of my favorite reads that I would recommend to anyone who likes loooong stories with a ton of plot and character focus, a dark story with persistent hopeful undertones, a romance that's built on communication and trust, and anyone who simply likes reading about crime.
Silent Reading is split into 5 parts with each part focusing on its own criminal case with some overlapping elements as Luo Wenzhou strives to solve the truth behind complex cases, sometimes helped by the infuriating rich prettyboy Fei Du.
This is definitely one of the darker stories I've read but despite that, after finishing Silent Reading I was left with feelings of deeprooted hope and a drive to live life to the fullest. The romance was refreshing with the level of communication and active work that both parties commit to the relationship, and none of the conflict ever has anything to do with their sexualities. While there were many moments of conflict in the relationship that would in many books be used to seperate the characters for a while (ie one character gets angry and storms out, the resolution is then delayed and muddled and drawn out for drama), Luo Wenzhou and Fei Du instead keep trying. They try to make it work even when they've reached their breaking points. They chose not to let go, even when its painful or awkward or stressful. Even when it means prying their own hearts open again and again and the resolution is that much more intense and impactful for it.
But their relationship is only one facet of the story.
Trauma is a central focus of the story. Namely what life looks like after trauma. Among all the dark cases, the crimes, the pain, the endless victims and sorrow it urges, patiently but firmly, that there exists a life beyond trauma. You may never be the same person you were before the event or circumstance that changed your life. You almost certainly won’t be the same again. The pain might be with you forever. It can change your brain chemistry and your personality and color every other thought you have.
But trauma doesn’t have to rule you if you choose to rule it.
The way Silent Reading shows and talks about trauma frequently made me want to go for long walks and cry about it and know I’ll be okay even if I am very much not okay. Something about the choice to keep going is already more than enough and that those who may act abnormally due to trauma are not burdens but are in fact people worthy of love because love is patience and understanding and care and even though trauma can twist the world into appearing as a much scarier place than it is, there really are good people in it who will love you with patience and understanding and care. Your mind has already been shaped once, your entire life uprooted. Who’s to say it can’t change again, in a better direction, on your terms?
Silent Reading tells us all of this. It reminds us to hope, that sincerity can work miracles. It’s a reminder to have faith in yourself – your strength, your inner light, and your future. It paints a picture of recovery that is messy and painful and so very difficult. Recovery is endless. It can be a blind leap of faith and you may get burned many more times on the road. But the only way to experience a better life is to keep moving forward.
That's what made it so special to me. I'm only knocking off a star for an off-color SA joke, and because things got a little confusing in part 5. Aside from that, one of my favorite reads that I would recommend to anyone who likes loooong stories with a ton of plot and character focus, a dark story with persistent hopeful undertones, a romance that's built on communication and trust, and anyone who simply likes reading about crime.
[02/21/2023]
Ariah ★★★★★ by B.R. Sanders - M/M/F Polyam Fantasy Romance
Ariah's magical training has been interrupted. Forced to rely on a mentor, Dirva, who is not who he claims to be, Ariah is drawn into a culture wholly different from the elven one that raised him. Along this new journey he’ll discover just how much he’s willing to give up to find his place in the world, and learn what it means to sacrifice himself for freedom—and for love.
Before Ariah I had never read a good gay elf book. I tried. I searched. I gave up on the possibility of there being a good gay elf book. Ariah took every elf book I ever read before and threw it all in the river, hooking me from the very beginning. Ariah transcends being just an elf book. There aren't enough words to elegantly explain the emotional cleanse this put me through.
Along this deeply character-driven journey Ariah gives us many things, among them being a patient exploration of intimacy in a relationship beyond sex. In addition to sex. Outside of sex. Emotional intimacy, psychological intimacy, heart to heart intimacy. Physical intimacy within and without sex. All of it and everything and more. The learning and unlearing and relearning of who you are and what you need and what it means when you find someone who is willing to stay by you through it, who you are willing to stay by. More than willing. How there is more than one way to fit together and more than one person you can fit together with. Those we need to leave behind in order to love in the way we need to love….. how it's never perfect and things will always change and that's okay. If you can love and be loved it's okay. How you can never be too odd or too much or too little for the right person(s).
Ariah also gives us different family structures and gender roles surrounding childbirth including men whose hormones change to allow them to breastfeed if they have a bond with a newborn child. Which, to be frank, shook my entire world.
If you like emotional character-heavy journies, impactful polyamory that isn't there just to be sexy, angst enough to tear your heart out, and elves, give Ariah a try. I can't be more grateful that I did.
Ariah ★★★★★ by B.R. Sanders - M/M/F Polyam Fantasy Romance
Ariah's magical training has been interrupted. Forced to rely on a mentor, Dirva, who is not who he claims to be, Ariah is drawn into a culture wholly different from the elven one that raised him. Along this new journey he’ll discover just how much he’s willing to give up to find his place in the world, and learn what it means to sacrifice himself for freedom—and for love.
Before Ariah I had never read a good gay elf book. I tried. I searched. I gave up on the possibility of there being a good gay elf book. Ariah took every elf book I ever read before and threw it all in the river, hooking me from the very beginning. Ariah transcends being just an elf book. There aren't enough words to elegantly explain the emotional cleanse this put me through.
Along this deeply character-driven journey Ariah gives us many things, among them being a patient exploration of intimacy in a relationship beyond sex. In addition to sex. Outside of sex. Emotional intimacy, psychological intimacy, heart to heart intimacy. Physical intimacy within and without sex. All of it and everything and more. The learning and unlearing and relearning of who you are and what you need and what it means when you find someone who is willing to stay by you through it, who you are willing to stay by. More than willing. How there is more than one way to fit together and more than one person you can fit together with. Those we need to leave behind in order to love in the way we need to love….. how it's never perfect and things will always change and that's okay. If you can love and be loved it's okay. How you can never be too odd or too much or too little for the right person(s).
Ariah also gives us different family structures and gender roles surrounding childbirth including men whose hormones change to allow them to breastfeed if they have a bond with a newborn child. Which, to be frank, shook my entire world.
If you like emotional character-heavy journies, impactful polyamory that isn't there just to be sexy, angst enough to tear your heart out, and elves, give Ariah a try. I can't be more grateful that I did.
[02/18/2023]
Luck in the Shadows ★★☆☆☆ by Lynn Flewelling - Fantasy, eventual M/M
When young Alec of Kerry is taken prisoner for a crime he didn't commit, he is certain that his life is at an end. But one thing he never expected was his cellmate. Spy, rogue, thief, and noble, Seregil of Rhiminee is many things-none of them predictable. And when he offers to take on Alec as his apprentice, things may never be the same again for either of them.
Mixed feelings on this one. I enjoyed the first half with all its adventure and sense of curiosity, but once they hit Rhiminee I was struck with the most likely reason I dropped this book the first time, which is that worldbuilding is not this author’s strong point. I felt zero investment for the political field and all characters involved in that fiasco. Seemingly important elements kept getting washed out by boring exposition and even more boring side characters (and the extremely underwhelming utilization of centaurs. Hello! Centaurs! How can you get that wrong?)
But I am intrigued by the scar plotpoint and enjoy it when Alec and Seregil are off adventuring on their own, so I’ll see what else the series has to offer.... eventually. Because I know there's meant to be romance in here at some point, even if the age gap has me frightened. I'd like to find out how it plays out, and learn why this series is so beloved in so many hearts.
Luck in the Shadows ★★☆☆☆ by Lynn Flewelling - Fantasy, eventual M/M
When young Alec of Kerry is taken prisoner for a crime he didn't commit, he is certain that his life is at an end. But one thing he never expected was his cellmate. Spy, rogue, thief, and noble, Seregil of Rhiminee is many things-none of them predictable. And when he offers to take on Alec as his apprentice, things may never be the same again for either of them.
Mixed feelings on this one. I enjoyed the first half with all its adventure and sense of curiosity, but once they hit Rhiminee I was struck with the most likely reason I dropped this book the first time, which is that worldbuilding is not this author’s strong point. I felt zero investment for the political field and all characters involved in that fiasco. Seemingly important elements kept getting washed out by boring exposition and even more boring side characters (and the extremely underwhelming utilization of centaurs. Hello! Centaurs! How can you get that wrong?)
But I am intrigued by the scar plotpoint and enjoy it when Alec and Seregil are off adventuring on their own, so I’ll see what else the series has to offer.... eventually. Because I know there's meant to be romance in here at some point, even if the age gap has me frightened. I'd like to find out how it plays out, and learn why this series is so beloved in so many hearts.
[02/12/2023]
Chasing Cold ★★★☆☆ by Stephan Graham King - M/M Scifi
A mailman on a eternally frozen refugee planet falls in love with a man he only knows through video correspondence and embarks on a journey to meet him.
This book had a lovely concept, with okay execution. The intro caught my attention deeply but my biggest letdown had to do with the depth of the main character. He had me in the first half - I love a sad, hurting man with hopes too big for his body. But midway he kind of slipped through my grasp and I wasn't really sure where his personality went. Solid story otherwise though, it revitalized my love for scifi and secured a spot as one of my top M/M scifis, even if that category doesn't have much competition. But as it stands this is a good read.
Chasing Cold ★★★☆☆ by Stephan Graham King - M/M Scifi
A mailman on a eternally frozen refugee planet falls in love with a man he only knows through video correspondence and embarks on a journey to meet him.
This book had a lovely concept, with okay execution. The intro caught my attention deeply but my biggest letdown had to do with the depth of the main character. He had me in the first half - I love a sad, hurting man with hopes too big for his body. But midway he kind of slipped through my grasp and I wasn't really sure where his personality went. Solid story otherwise though, it revitalized my love for scifi and secured a spot as one of my top M/M scifis, even if that category doesn't have much competition. But as it stands this is a good read.
[01/20/2023]
Master of One ★★★☆☆ by Dani Bennett and Jaida Jones - YA Fantasy, M/M Romance, Transfem MC
Rags the thief has never met a pocket he couldn't pick, but when he's captured by a sorcerer with world-ending plans, he realizes even he is in over his head. Forced to use his finely honed skills to nab pieces of an ancient fae relic, Rags is stunned to discover that those "relics" just so happen to be people.
My main qualm with this book is the fact that it's YA. The limitations of the genre just don't pull me in deep enough. The clipped writing style (different from their previous works) also confused me on more than a few dozen occasions, and made me hunger for deeper/lengthier descriptions during emotional sections. Yes this book is 531 pages. I still wish it had more words.
But aside from the clipped writing style and shortfalls of YA, I really liked the plot. I loved the tone especially -- the violence, the pain, the determination. The messy friendships, the secrets, the kisses. The injuries! The world! The magic metal animal companions (even if I still think Havemercy did it better), and the very real weight of consequences. I also didn't think I was going to like our main protagonist Rags at first -- with all his quippy dialogue and snarky attitude. There's no faster way to turn me off from a character than constant snark. But about halfway through he cemented himself as my favorite POV with Somhairle as a close 2nd. I absolutely tore through the 2nd half and I can't wait for the next book to come out. I care about these characters. I am fascinated by the fae. And I want badly to return to this fucked up world.
But I have to say I really hope this author duo will return to writing adult fiction someday, if they have any interest in doing so. Even if they don't I'm committed to their works, I love their stories and the way they characterize their casts, and can't wait to read whatever else they'll offer to the world. But I can't help my disdain for what YA is doing to skilled queer authors who started out writing really good queer adult fiction.
Master of One ★★★☆☆ by Dani Bennett and Jaida Jones - YA Fantasy, M/M Romance, Transfem MC
Rags the thief has never met a pocket he couldn't pick, but when he's captured by a sorcerer with world-ending plans, he realizes even he is in over his head. Forced to use his finely honed skills to nab pieces of an ancient fae relic, Rags is stunned to discover that those "relics" just so happen to be people.
My main qualm with this book is the fact that it's YA. The limitations of the genre just don't pull me in deep enough. The clipped writing style (different from their previous works) also confused me on more than a few dozen occasions, and made me hunger for deeper/lengthier descriptions during emotional sections. Yes this book is 531 pages. I still wish it had more words.
But aside from the clipped writing style and shortfalls of YA, I really liked the plot. I loved the tone especially -- the violence, the pain, the determination. The messy friendships, the secrets, the kisses. The injuries! The world! The magic metal animal companions (even if I still think Havemercy did it better), and the very real weight of consequences. I also didn't think I was going to like our main protagonist Rags at first -- with all his quippy dialogue and snarky attitude. There's no faster way to turn me off from a character than constant snark. But about halfway through he cemented himself as my favorite POV with Somhairle as a close 2nd. I absolutely tore through the 2nd half and I can't wait for the next book to come out. I care about these characters. I am fascinated by the fae. And I want badly to return to this fucked up world.
But I have to say I really hope this author duo will return to writing adult fiction someday, if they have any interest in doing so. Even if they don't I'm committed to their works, I love their stories and the way they characterize their casts, and can't wait to read whatever else they'll offer to the world. But I can't help my disdain for what YA is doing to skilled queer authors who started out writing really good queer adult fiction.
[12/23/2022]
Amberlough ★★★★☆ by Lara Elena Donnelly - M/M Historical Fantasy Mystery Thriller
A double-agent sacrifices all his ideals in order to save his smuggler lover before a government coup takes over their decadent city. As the twinkling lights of nightclub marquees yield to the rising flames of a fascist revolution, three players in a dangerous political game will struggle to survive using whatever means—and people—necessary. Including each other.
This book has some of the most catered-to-me characters I’ve ever seen, they constantly felt too good to be real. The world is absolutely rich with color and glamor and grit and not everything is handed to you on a silver platter. You have to do a bit of your own work to understand the finer details and I love when a book does that, even if the politics were a little confusing at first. It’s immersive, it’s high stakes, its so unbelievably sexy. The drama and tension between Cyril and Aristide never let go of my attention, I loved every possible facet of their relationship. Their story is absolutely solid. The whole thing felt like a dream, like the quality was way too good to feature this much attention on messy, hopeless, viscous gay people. I haven’t read the rest of the series yet but I do want to.
(I am, however, a blond Cyril denier. That man has dark hair and you can’t convince me otherwise.)
Amberlough ★★★★☆ by Lara Elena Donnelly - M/M Historical Fantasy Mystery Thriller
A double-agent sacrifices all his ideals in order to save his smuggler lover before a government coup takes over their decadent city. As the twinkling lights of nightclub marquees yield to the rising flames of a fascist revolution, three players in a dangerous political game will struggle to survive using whatever means—and people—necessary. Including each other.
This book has some of the most catered-to-me characters I’ve ever seen, they constantly felt too good to be real. The world is absolutely rich with color and glamor and grit and not everything is handed to you on a silver platter. You have to do a bit of your own work to understand the finer details and I love when a book does that, even if the politics were a little confusing at first. It’s immersive, it’s high stakes, its so unbelievably sexy. The drama and tension between Cyril and Aristide never let go of my attention, I loved every possible facet of their relationship. Their story is absolutely solid. The whole thing felt like a dream, like the quality was way too good to feature this much attention on messy, hopeless, viscous gay people. I haven’t read the rest of the series yet but I do want to.
(I am, however, a blond Cyril denier. That man has dark hair and you can’t convince me otherwise.)
[12/16/2022]
The Sorcerer of the Wildeeps ★★★★☆ by Kai Ashante Wilson - M/M Fantasy
Since leaving his homeland, the earthbound demigod Demane has been labeled a sorcerer. With his ancestors' artifacts in hand, the Sorcerer follows the Captain, a beautiful man with song for a voice and hair that drinks the sunlight. The two of them are the descendants of the gods who abandoned the Earth for Heaven, and they will need all the gifts those divine ancestors left to them to keep their caravan brothers alive.
Wholly unique, a sensory delight. I was intimidated at first by the quality and depth of writing - this was a clear and honest challenge. Was I up for it? Did I have what it takes to understand this fantastic story? But it didn't matter, because by some magic possesed within the pages I ate word after word, drinking as if from a crystalline waterfall, at times bitter with viscera, sweet with ichor. Occasionally I had to slow or stop to reread certain passages and phrases to parse their meaning, but more often than not the fluid pacing kept pulling me forward, urging me to trust the structure of the work like guiding me over riverslick rocks by my hand. And by that twisted sorcery, the veil pulled from my eyes, I understood.
Masterful work.
Absolute treasure of storytelling.
The Sorcerer of the Wildeeps ★★★★☆ by Kai Ashante Wilson - M/M Fantasy
Since leaving his homeland, the earthbound demigod Demane has been labeled a sorcerer. With his ancestors' artifacts in hand, the Sorcerer follows the Captain, a beautiful man with song for a voice and hair that drinks the sunlight. The two of them are the descendants of the gods who abandoned the Earth for Heaven, and they will need all the gifts those divine ancestors left to them to keep their caravan brothers alive.
Wholly unique, a sensory delight. I was intimidated at first by the quality and depth of writing - this was a clear and honest challenge. Was I up for it? Did I have what it takes to understand this fantastic story? But it didn't matter, because by some magic possesed within the pages I ate word after word, drinking as if from a crystalline waterfall, at times bitter with viscera, sweet with ichor. Occasionally I had to slow or stop to reread certain passages and phrases to parse their meaning, but more often than not the fluid pacing kept pulling me forward, urging me to trust the structure of the work like guiding me over riverslick rocks by my hand. And by that twisted sorcery, the veil pulled from my eyes, I understood.
Masterful work.
Absolute treasure of storytelling.
[11/18/2022]
A Taste of Gold and Iron ★★★☆☆ by Alexandra Rowland - M/M Fantasy Romance
Kadou, the shy prince of Arasht, finds himself at odds with one of the most powerful ambassadors at court in an altercation which results in his humiliation. To prove his loyalty to the queen, Kadou takes responsibility for the investigation of a break-in at one of their guilds, with the help of his newly appointed bodyguard, the coldly handsome Evemer.
This is an okay read. Not bad enough to give 2 stars, but not entirely gripping and here's why:
My biggest issue was the POV switches that frequently occured mid-scene, which always stopped the flow cold in its tracks and made it difficult to stay invested in what was going on. Not that there was much to keep track of, the plot is very secondary to the romance, which is not something I personally tend to enjoy. But in this case the romance was fine, and the MCs were interesting enough (especially Evemer. Hello big man who struggles to express himself, I have a soft spot for you). But there were definitely a few moments that felt like, 'yeah, ok, I'm reading a romance right now' in that I was being told about their feelings more than I was experiencing their impact.
Another thing I didn't really like was the dialogue. At times it was great, but other times it sounded like a bad netflix adaptation - disgustingly modern and trife. The dissonance was upsetting and made it difficult to continue to like certain characters. I like my fantasy to feel fantasy. The dialogue kept taking me out of the fantasy and kicking screaming into contemporary.
The world building also felt promising but was frequently sidelined for the sake of lengthy internal monologues about how the characters don't understand their feelings and how that's so so hard on them </3 The whole concept about touch-tasting felt very strange and underexplored. Every time it was brought up I had already forgotten that it was a part of the story. (And what's up with the sea serpents?)
Overall I don't think this book needed to be as long as it was. Its length was to its detriment with how anticlimactic the ending was. But it had its fun moments, especially in the first 60~70% or so. Not a bad book for a casual romance read, but not one that will likely stick with me for long.
A Taste of Gold and Iron ★★★☆☆ by Alexandra Rowland - M/M Fantasy Romance
Kadou, the shy prince of Arasht, finds himself at odds with one of the most powerful ambassadors at court in an altercation which results in his humiliation. To prove his loyalty to the queen, Kadou takes responsibility for the investigation of a break-in at one of their guilds, with the help of his newly appointed bodyguard, the coldly handsome Evemer.
This is an okay read. Not bad enough to give 2 stars, but not entirely gripping and here's why:
My biggest issue was the POV switches that frequently occured mid-scene, which always stopped the flow cold in its tracks and made it difficult to stay invested in what was going on. Not that there was much to keep track of, the plot is very secondary to the romance, which is not something I personally tend to enjoy. But in this case the romance was fine, and the MCs were interesting enough (especially Evemer. Hello big man who struggles to express himself, I have a soft spot for you). But there were definitely a few moments that felt like, 'yeah, ok, I'm reading a romance right now' in that I was being told about their feelings more than I was experiencing their impact.
Another thing I didn't really like was the dialogue. At times it was great, but other times it sounded like a bad netflix adaptation - disgustingly modern and trife. The dissonance was upsetting and made it difficult to continue to like certain characters. I like my fantasy to feel fantasy. The dialogue kept taking me out of the fantasy and kicking screaming into contemporary.
The world building also felt promising but was frequently sidelined for the sake of lengthy internal monologues about how the characters don't understand their feelings and how that's so so hard on them </3 The whole concept about touch-tasting felt very strange and underexplored. Every time it was brought up I had already forgotten that it was a part of the story. (And what's up with the sea serpents?)
Overall I don't think this book needed to be as long as it was. Its length was to its detriment with how anticlimactic the ending was. But it had its fun moments, especially in the first 60~70% or so. Not a bad book for a casual romance read, but not one that will likely stick with me for long.
[11/08/2022]
The Ophiuchi Hotline ★★★★☆ by John Varley - Scifi with casual Bisexuality + Sex changes
After the effortless capture of Earth by vastly superior aliens, humanity is forced to fight for existence on the Moon and other lumps of airless rock. The invention of the Hotline — a constant stream of data from a star in the constellation Ophiuchus — facilitates survival and enables the development of amazing new technologies. Then, after 400 years, humanity's unknown helpers send a bill for their services...and suddenly everything is threatened once again.
Very weird (affectionate) little book from 1977 that reads surprisingly modern in its style and subject. It has a very interesting female MC (something still lacking in sci-fi) and I really enjoyed all the ways casual bisexuality and transgenderism were portrayed. When I heard this series featured casual/normalized sex changes I didn't know what to expect, but ended up really enjoying the role it played and the different ways it was explored. Surprisingly forward and weird, in a good way. Though none of the characters are explicitly stated as trans it's easy to see how trans people can seamlessly exist in this world and do very cool and morally ambiguous things with their epic bodies.
The story itself was interesting and full of strange scifi concepts I really enjoyed. Very cool read, definitely interested in reading more in the series.
The Ophiuchi Hotline ★★★★☆ by John Varley - Scifi with casual Bisexuality + Sex changes
After the effortless capture of Earth by vastly superior aliens, humanity is forced to fight for existence on the Moon and other lumps of airless rock. The invention of the Hotline — a constant stream of data from a star in the constellation Ophiuchus — facilitates survival and enables the development of amazing new technologies. Then, after 400 years, humanity's unknown helpers send a bill for their services...and suddenly everything is threatened once again.
Very weird (affectionate) little book from 1977 that reads surprisingly modern in its style and subject. It has a very interesting female MC (something still lacking in sci-fi) and I really enjoyed all the ways casual bisexuality and transgenderism were portrayed. When I heard this series featured casual/normalized sex changes I didn't know what to expect, but ended up really enjoying the role it played and the different ways it was explored. Surprisingly forward and weird, in a good way. Though none of the characters are explicitly stated as trans it's easy to see how trans people can seamlessly exist in this world and do very cool and morally ambiguous things with their epic bodies.
The story itself was interesting and full of strange scifi concepts I really enjoyed. Very cool read, definitely interested in reading more in the series.
[10/14/2022]
The Ragged Blade ★★★★☆ by Christopher Ruz - M/M Dark Fantasy
As a young mercenary, Richard followed a mysterious Magician on a quest to steal a treasure from a demon and overthrow a king. The two men started their journey as strangers, became lovers along the way, and ended as master and loyal soldier. Twenty years later, that kingdom is steadily falling into ruin and Richard has realized that time and power have twisted the Magician into more monster than man...
This is the story of a tragic, violent man fleeing across the desert with his feral daughter to get away from a murderous magician man he loved, once. How belief in something true can transform it from a concept into something real and malleable. How there is no such thing as a broken person in need of being fixed. No wrong or right way to be. How every moment spent with those we love is a gift.
This is a truly special book. It took me a while to get through it because of how tense and heavy the tone is - the MC spends pretty much the whole book in a state of dread and hyper vigilance, so at some points I could only read a little at a time. But it's done very well, to have such an impact on me.
My favorite thing 100% hands down was the twisted m/m relationship. Not only is it rare to see a complex dynamic like this between two male characters, I found there was a lot of depth to it and I was super invested in their history and how it developed into their present states. It's not healthy, it's not happy, but it makes for such a unique story that's crafted with utmost quality and attention. To top it all off with Richard's touching yet troubled relationship with his feral daughter.... chefs kiss to the very end.
The only unfortunate side to this book is that the rest of the series will not likely be published any time soon due to the shutdown of Parvus Press. I emailed the author about the matter and he let me know there's still hope it might hit shelves with his new agent, but that's years down the line and depends on a number of factors. A huge shame, because there's so much potential here. I'm eager to see whatever else he might get to publish though, and will surely keep an eye out for his name.
The Ragged Blade ★★★★☆ by Christopher Ruz - M/M Dark Fantasy
As a young mercenary, Richard followed a mysterious Magician on a quest to steal a treasure from a demon and overthrow a king. The two men started their journey as strangers, became lovers along the way, and ended as master and loyal soldier. Twenty years later, that kingdom is steadily falling into ruin and Richard has realized that time and power have twisted the Magician into more monster than man...
This is the story of a tragic, violent man fleeing across the desert with his feral daughter to get away from a murderous magician man he loved, once. How belief in something true can transform it from a concept into something real and malleable. How there is no such thing as a broken person in need of being fixed. No wrong or right way to be. How every moment spent with those we love is a gift.
This is a truly special book. It took me a while to get through it because of how tense and heavy the tone is - the MC spends pretty much the whole book in a state of dread and hyper vigilance, so at some points I could only read a little at a time. But it's done very well, to have such an impact on me.
My favorite thing 100% hands down was the twisted m/m relationship. Not only is it rare to see a complex dynamic like this between two male characters, I found there was a lot of depth to it and I was super invested in their history and how it developed into their present states. It's not healthy, it's not happy, but it makes for such a unique story that's crafted with utmost quality and attention. To top it all off with Richard's touching yet troubled relationship with his feral daughter.... chefs kiss to the very end.
The only unfortunate side to this book is that the rest of the series will not likely be published any time soon due to the shutdown of Parvus Press. I emailed the author about the matter and he let me know there's still hope it might hit shelves with his new agent, but that's years down the line and depends on a number of factors. A huge shame, because there's so much potential here. I'm eager to see whatever else he might get to publish though, and will surely keep an eye out for his name.
[09/29/2022]
Stalking Tender Prey ★★☆☆☆ by Storm Constantine - M/M Fantasy Horror
The Grigori are an ancient race. Powerful people, possessing abilities and senses humans do not have. They live among us, their presence clear to those who have eyes to see... When Peverel Othman arrives in the quiet hamlet of Little Moor following a strange calling, the lives of twins Lily and Owen are forever changed.
This one is hard to rate. Having read Wraeththu a few years back, this was not my first rodeo with Storm Constantine. I had some expectations going in that this would probably be an uncomfortable and disturbing read. And it was, don't get me wrong. I tried reading it with two friends and they both DNF'd it about halfway through. But despite it all, there's still something that intrigues me about Constantine's storytelling.
First off, the mythological worldbuiling here isn't super unique. Angel-human hybrids known as Nephilim, Giborim, or giants appear in multiple religious texts and Constantine doesn't really bring anything new to the table in that regard. The rest of the characters are fairly regular people, or as regular as they can be when everything starts going to shit.
I would describe Stalking Tender Prey as a sexual horror. Having said that, my main issue doesn't even align with the book itself, but rather the reviews that described this book as 'sexy' when it couldn't be further from that word in my mind. I don't mean to shame anyone for their interests, I enjoy a good mix of sex and horror myself, but this book is repulsive. It's really good at setting an oppressive tone of despair and helplessness, and I really don't know if the author intended any of the horrors in this book to be sexy. Everyone is at some point a victim of unimaginable, and often sexual, trauma.
But while at times it came off as a work of torture porn, the thing that kept my interest and made me want to finish it was the little tiny sparks of resilience and hope alive in the characters present from time to time. These sparks are far and few between, which definitely made it hard to read, but they are there and for some reason I can't bring myself to hate this book. I wish it wasn't so terribly slow and boring at times, hence the rating I settled with. But there's still something here that pulls at me. Like being unable to look away from a car wreck. I want to see these character prevail through even the worst of horrors. Even if they are altered beyond recognition, even if the journey is really rather repulsive, their resillience is the true story, to me.
This likely won't be my last attempt reading Storm Constantine either.
Stalking Tender Prey ★★☆☆☆ by Storm Constantine - M/M Fantasy Horror
The Grigori are an ancient race. Powerful people, possessing abilities and senses humans do not have. They live among us, their presence clear to those who have eyes to see... When Peverel Othman arrives in the quiet hamlet of Little Moor following a strange calling, the lives of twins Lily and Owen are forever changed.
This one is hard to rate. Having read Wraeththu a few years back, this was not my first rodeo with Storm Constantine. I had some expectations going in that this would probably be an uncomfortable and disturbing read. And it was, don't get me wrong. I tried reading it with two friends and they both DNF'd it about halfway through. But despite it all, there's still something that intrigues me about Constantine's storytelling.
First off, the mythological worldbuiling here isn't super unique. Angel-human hybrids known as Nephilim, Giborim, or giants appear in multiple religious texts and Constantine doesn't really bring anything new to the table in that regard. The rest of the characters are fairly regular people, or as regular as they can be when everything starts going to shit.
I would describe Stalking Tender Prey as a sexual horror. Having said that, my main issue doesn't even align with the book itself, but rather the reviews that described this book as 'sexy' when it couldn't be further from that word in my mind. I don't mean to shame anyone for their interests, I enjoy a good mix of sex and horror myself, but this book is repulsive. It's really good at setting an oppressive tone of despair and helplessness, and I really don't know if the author intended any of the horrors in this book to be sexy. Everyone is at some point a victim of unimaginable, and often sexual, trauma.
But while at times it came off as a work of torture porn, the thing that kept my interest and made me want to finish it was the little tiny sparks of resilience and hope alive in the characters present from time to time. These sparks are far and few between, which definitely made it hard to read, but they are there and for some reason I can't bring myself to hate this book. I wish it wasn't so terribly slow and boring at times, hence the rating I settled with. But there's still something here that pulls at me. Like being unable to look away from a car wreck. I want to see these character prevail through even the worst of horrors. Even if they are altered beyond recognition, even if the journey is really rather repulsive, their resillience is the true story, to me.
This likely won't be my last attempt reading Storm Constantine either.
[09/03/2022]
A Royal Affair ★★★★☆ by John Wiltshire - M/M Historical Romance
A Royal Affair ★★★★☆ by John Wiltshire - M/M Historical Romance
content warning(s):
past SA, PTSD, Christian homophobia
Doctor Nikolai Hartmann represents himself as a learned man of science who believes wholly in the rational and scientific above all else. In reality, he is a man haunted by an unusual past and running from his own nature. While traveling to a dying king’s bedside to offer his medical expertise, Nikolai is set upon by a bandit. But when he reaches the king’s ancient stronghold, he discovers his mysterious brigand is the beautiful, arrogant Prince Aleksey. Aleksey is everything Nikolai is not: unguarded, passionate and willful. Despite their differences, Nikolai feels an irresistible desire for the young royal that keeps him in Aleksey’s thrall.
I had zero expectations for this one. I've had poor experiences with anything published by Dreamspinner press in the past, and I told myself I would never touch another one of their soggy books again. I very nearly had no choice but to follow through with that promise, with how impossible it is to acquire this book through any official means. But acquire it I did, and wow -- To call it a gem among the rough would be an understatement.
I was in love from the very beginning. The setup -- Nikolai writing in no uncertain terms that he would relive the events he is about to document exactly as they were if he had the option to go back, the foreboding sense of dread this instilled from the get-go, the intense curiosity to know why he felt this way, the excitement sparked by Aleksey's very first appearance -- I was hooked. I was bewitched. I haven't highlighted this many quotes from a single book since... ever. The writing is superb. But my favorite part, other than the style of narrative, is how stubbornly joyous it remains. The events are dark, and had this been written by anyone else I would call it a dark fantasy. But there's just too much joy, too much hope, too much love, to say any part of this was miserable. There's angst, sure, and by the end I felt thoroughly bruised and shaken. But a large part of that ache was from the sheer gentleness of it all.
I loved the dismantling of Christianity. I loved the jokes. I loved Aleksey's demeanor, his actions, his way of flirting. I loved Nikolai's mind, the way he would chose to describe certain scenes and feelings and I loved them every moment they were near each other. The progression of their relationship had me torn asunder at every step of the way.
It wasn't all perfect. I didn't like the major focus on sex near the end, only because it seemed to replace everything else, and a major point of trauma seemed too quickly fixed. I missed reading their conversations and casual interactions, and overall that section felt the weakest compared to everything else. I also wish Faelan played a bigger role... in any capacity, because I frequently forgot he even existed. He seemed important in the very beginning and then he just wasn't really there for 99% of the book, which was a grand waste.
But other than that, this was a delight to read, and I badly want to get my hands on a physical copy so I can lovingly reread it and force it upon all my friends.
I had zero expectations for this one. I've had poor experiences with anything published by Dreamspinner press in the past, and I told myself I would never touch another one of their soggy books again. I very nearly had no choice but to follow through with that promise, with how impossible it is to acquire this book through any official means. But acquire it I did, and wow -- To call it a gem among the rough would be an understatement.
I was in love from the very beginning. The setup -- Nikolai writing in no uncertain terms that he would relive the events he is about to document exactly as they were if he had the option to go back, the foreboding sense of dread this instilled from the get-go, the intense curiosity to know why he felt this way, the excitement sparked by Aleksey's very first appearance -- I was hooked. I was bewitched. I haven't highlighted this many quotes from a single book since... ever. The writing is superb. But my favorite part, other than the style of narrative, is how stubbornly joyous it remains. The events are dark, and had this been written by anyone else I would call it a dark fantasy. But there's just too much joy, too much hope, too much love, to say any part of this was miserable. There's angst, sure, and by the end I felt thoroughly bruised and shaken. But a large part of that ache was from the sheer gentleness of it all.
I loved the dismantling of Christianity. I loved the jokes. I loved Aleksey's demeanor, his actions, his way of flirting. I loved Nikolai's mind, the way he would chose to describe certain scenes and feelings and I loved them every moment they were near each other. The progression of their relationship had me torn asunder at every step of the way.
It wasn't all perfect. I didn't like the major focus on sex near the end, only because it seemed to replace everything else, and a major point of trauma seemed too quickly fixed. I missed reading their conversations and casual interactions, and overall that section felt the weakest compared to everything else. I also wish Faelan played a bigger role... in any capacity, because I frequently forgot he even existed. He seemed important in the very beginning and then he just wasn't really there for 99% of the book, which was a grand waste.
But other than that, this was a delight to read, and I badly want to get my hands on a physical copy so I can lovingly reread it and force it upon all my friends.
[02/16/2023]
Aleksey's Kingdom ★★★★☆
The sequel to A Royal Affair takes us to the wilderness of the Americas to discover why a distant outpost has been mysteriously abandoned. While traveling through the wilderness with their new companions, Nikolai and Aleksey begin to realize that their rescue operation is part of a far more sinister conspiracy.
I was wary of reading this right after completing the 1st book because the description made it seem so different. And it is different, but I found it refreshing to come back to these characters after time away to check in on how they're doing - to watch them iron out some leftover kinks, and to know that they're going to be okay. I also loved the unexpected horror element added to the story. I thought the build up was executed very well and it was beyond fascinating to watch these characters navigate their relationship and the difficult world around them long after getting together. The early stages of romance and courtship are always fun to read but I loooove getting to see couples who have stuck with each other and grown together.
This sequel was equal parts fun and emotional and disturbing (in a good way). Niko and Aleksey both feel so unique and alive and I loved experiencing their realistic arguments and conversations again. It gave me more than I could have wanted and I'm just sad that means there won’t be a 3rd book. Don't feel put off by the different tone and story like I was initially, this sequel is a very worthwhile conclusion.
Aleksey's Kingdom ★★★★☆
The sequel to A Royal Affair takes us to the wilderness of the Americas to discover why a distant outpost has been mysteriously abandoned. While traveling through the wilderness with their new companions, Nikolai and Aleksey begin to realize that their rescue operation is part of a far more sinister conspiracy.
I was wary of reading this right after completing the 1st book because the description made it seem so different. And it is different, but I found it refreshing to come back to these characters after time away to check in on how they're doing - to watch them iron out some leftover kinks, and to know that they're going to be okay. I also loved the unexpected horror element added to the story. I thought the build up was executed very well and it was beyond fascinating to watch these characters navigate their relationship and the difficult world around them long after getting together. The early stages of romance and courtship are always fun to read but I loooove getting to see couples who have stuck with each other and grown together.
This sequel was equal parts fun and emotional and disturbing (in a good way). Niko and Aleksey both feel so unique and alive and I loved experiencing their realistic arguments and conversations again. It gave me more than I could have wanted and I'm just sad that means there won’t be a 3rd book. Don't feel put off by the different tone and story like I was initially, this sequel is a very worthwhile conclusion.
Drake Chronicles by Lauren Gilley - M/M M/F Fantasy Romance
content warning(s):
chronic illness
After the untimely deaths of all his male relatives, bastard Oliver Meacham is sent to accompany his cousin Tessa to the kingdom of Aeretoll, with a hope that she might wed the fearsome warrior king who rules there in order to form an alliance to protect her people. But the stern, forbidding King Erik refuses to marry. He offers his nephew’s hand to Tessa instead. And to Oliver he offers insult, challenge – and the sorts of loaded glances that leave Oliver as flustered as he is furious.
The Drake Chronicles is a slow-burn fantasy series, full of court intrigue, adventure, drama, dragons, and passionate romance. Heavily influenced by Viking history and mythology, the series follows the intertwining stories of multiple couples as they fall in love, and fight to save their families, and their kingdoms.
[08/16/2022]
Heart of Winter ★★★☆☆
This is an easy to digest romance. Typically this kind of format fails to draw my interest. I like my romance to have a bit more substance and plot. I like having to work for my payoff, I like seeing it nestled fluidly within a story. But I gave this one a try on a whim, and I'm very glad I did, because I enjoyed this a lot more than I expected to.
The quality of writing here is nothing remarkable or even particularly memorable, and I can't say what it is exactly that gripped me so. Maybe it was the cold setting (which I am a sucker for), the size difference, the mutual repressed pining, or even the promise that dragons exist in this world. Most likely it was a combination of all of this, and of course, the romance. I was very endeared by Oliver's emotional journey into the Kingdom of Aeretoll, that eventually leads into the arms of the King himself, who is perhaps even more compelling in his utter besottement with Oliver. Their dynamic of two repressed, mature gays slowly orbiting around one another until their eventual collision was satisfying. I liked their personalities and chemistry, their interactions kept me up reading late into the night, and I don't really have anything bad to say about it. I even enjoyed some of the M/F stuff that happens in the sidelines. This books isn't perfect, but for what it is, I liked it a lot more than I thought I would.
[08/25/2022]
Edge of the Wild ★★☆☆☆
With how much I enjoyed the first book, I expected a little more from the sequel. Unfortunately, the pacing of this book was bogged down tremendously with the introduction of several new POVs, some of which severely hindered the momentum of the more interesting plot points, especially towards the end. Because there's actual plot in this series now! And at first I was excited, I couldn't wait to finally read about the dragons that were only briefly mentioned in the first book.
But it quickly became apparent that while Lauren Gailey writes decent romance -- my favorite parts of the book were the interactions between various love interests -- everything else could use a little work. Several times I considered DNF'ing because the structure of the story in this book is entirely unremarkable, the quality of writing is downright boring during some important plot elements, and the romance elements this time were pretty lackluster for the most part.
I also didn't understand the emergence of Oliver's somewhat haughty demeanor, at times acting as if he were raised his entire life to live his new role, instead of his bastard reality. It clashed with his apparent 'struggle' at accepting his new role and responsibilities, and seemed to me that he felt a lot more comfortable in it than he gave the impression of. It just felt too sudden a leap from the previous book. The romance also hit a particular pet peeve of mine where a large conflict in the main relationship was over one of them not saying "I love you" soon enough. It just felt lazy.
But despite all my complaining I do think there's an interesting tale here, if you squint, and I think it could really have shined with more intense editing. It was still mildly enjoyable over all, I just so badly wish I had reason to enjoy it more, because the potential is golden.
The Drake Chronicles is a slow-burn fantasy series, full of court intrigue, adventure, drama, dragons, and passionate romance. Heavily influenced by Viking history and mythology, the series follows the intertwining stories of multiple couples as they fall in love, and fight to save their families, and their kingdoms.
[08/16/2022]
Heart of Winter ★★★☆☆
This is an easy to digest romance. Typically this kind of format fails to draw my interest. I like my romance to have a bit more substance and plot. I like having to work for my payoff, I like seeing it nestled fluidly within a story. But I gave this one a try on a whim, and I'm very glad I did, because I enjoyed this a lot more than I expected to.
The quality of writing here is nothing remarkable or even particularly memorable, and I can't say what it is exactly that gripped me so. Maybe it was the cold setting (which I am a sucker for), the size difference, the mutual repressed pining, or even the promise that dragons exist in this world. Most likely it was a combination of all of this, and of course, the romance. I was very endeared by Oliver's emotional journey into the Kingdom of Aeretoll, that eventually leads into the arms of the King himself, who is perhaps even more compelling in his utter besottement with Oliver. Their dynamic of two repressed, mature gays slowly orbiting around one another until their eventual collision was satisfying. I liked their personalities and chemistry, their interactions kept me up reading late into the night, and I don't really have anything bad to say about it. I even enjoyed some of the M/F stuff that happens in the sidelines. This books isn't perfect, but for what it is, I liked it a lot more than I thought I would.
[08/25/2022]
Edge of the Wild ★★☆☆☆
With how much I enjoyed the first book, I expected a little more from the sequel. Unfortunately, the pacing of this book was bogged down tremendously with the introduction of several new POVs, some of which severely hindered the momentum of the more interesting plot points, especially towards the end. Because there's actual plot in this series now! And at first I was excited, I couldn't wait to finally read about the dragons that were only briefly mentioned in the first book.
But it quickly became apparent that while Lauren Gailey writes decent romance -- my favorite parts of the book were the interactions between various love interests -- everything else could use a little work. Several times I considered DNF'ing because the structure of the story in this book is entirely unremarkable, the quality of writing is downright boring during some important plot elements, and the romance elements this time were pretty lackluster for the most part.
I also didn't understand the emergence of Oliver's somewhat haughty demeanor, at times acting as if he were raised his entire life to live his new role, instead of his bastard reality. It clashed with his apparent 'struggle' at accepting his new role and responsibilities, and seemed to me that he felt a lot more comfortable in it than he gave the impression of. It just felt too sudden a leap from the previous book. The romance also hit a particular pet peeve of mine where a large conflict in the main relationship was over one of them not saying "I love you" soon enough. It just felt lazy.
But despite all my complaining I do think there's an interesting tale here, if you squint, and I think it could really have shined with more intense editing. It was still mildly enjoyable over all, I just so badly wish I had reason to enjoy it more, because the potential is golden.
[07/25/2022]
The Half Life of Valery K ★★★★☆ by Natasha Pulley - M/M Historical Fiction
The Half Life of Valery K ★★★★☆ by Natasha Pulley - M/M Historical Fiction
content warning(s):
PTSD, panic attacks, cancer, dog death, adultery, medical malpractice, nazis, medical experimentation on the jewish, mentions of r*pe, internalized homophobia, general soviet era despair
In 1963, Siberian Gulag prisoner Valery Kolkhanov is swept away to a mysterious town hidden in a forest so damaged it looks like the trees have rusted from within. His task is to serve out his remaining sentence as a scientist studying the effect of radiation on local animals. But questions begin to emerge around every corner, and if Valery keeps looking for answers, will he live to serve out his sentence?
This book was so close to a five star but Pulley's frequent use of british-specific terms in a soviet setting pissed me off so much I had to drop a full star. I shouldn't need to google the meaning of british words that russian-speaking characters are saying to each other. It's jarring, wildly out of place, and entirely aggravating especially since Pulley uses Russian terms a lot more sparingly. If you're going to introduce russian words to begin with, why not go all the way? It's half-assed. Secondly, it's never explained why an important character pronounces Valery's name in the english way, when this character doesn't know a word of english. This just wouldn't happen, especially not in a time when anyone could be accused of being an American spy for the smallest thing and sent off. There would have to be a reason for it, but one is never given. It comes off as lazy or insensitive.
Beside the language stuff, there were a few other seemingly important points that were never explained properly or expanded upon, and I had some gripes with the ending. Mostly: (spoilers!) Why did Anna, who never cared for her children in a motherly way, not send her kids with Kostya? Especially to somewhere they could get the medical care they needed? Also, Valery's gender?????¿¿¿ What's going on there, why didn't we learn more about that, I would kill to know more, etc. Pulley also attempts at times to express political commentary, especially at the end, that churned my stomach. It all felt very ham-fisted and an overstep on her part as a British author.
But, I still loved this book. This is a canonical M/M romance between two older russian guys, within the workings of a dangerous, secret nuclear radiated town, surrounded by a cruel and stifling government, and I really enjoyed it. I want to reread it already. it exceeded my expectations, where I had none. With some exceptions, the cadence of the writing felt very good. The progression of the romance was very believable for the time and place and it left me aching in the sweetest ways, reverently retracing favorite passages to reassure myself that yes, they really said or did that to each other, no, I'm not dreaming or wishfully thinking. Despite the bleakness of their lives I found myself smiling frequently and uncontrollably. To see their tenderness, their нежность prevail even in a stifling hostile environment, was indescribable.
Ultimately, I can't give an unbiased review, as a Russian reader. This hits something incredibly close to me, and will remain extremely special in my heart, but I think anyone with even a fleeting interest in radiation / nuclear disasters will enjoy this. The science was fascinating and exciting, and easy to follow. It also does a great job of painting the political climate of the KGB-era, and how some things still haven't changed in Russia as much as some might want to believe - how even today the only way to live a hopeful and fulfilling and honest life for many russians is to do what Valery does in the end. And while that fact left me pretty depressed, by no intention of the author no doubt, I'm still incredibly glad this book exists and I want to absorb into my very body so I can read it with every single fibre, cell, and neutron a hundred million times over.
Beside the language stuff, there were a few other seemingly important points that were never explained properly or expanded upon, and I had some gripes with the ending. Mostly: (spoilers!) Why did Anna, who never cared for her children in a motherly way, not send her kids with Kostya? Especially to somewhere they could get the medical care they needed? Also, Valery's gender?????¿¿¿ What's going on there, why didn't we learn more about that, I would kill to know more, etc. Pulley also attempts at times to express political commentary, especially at the end, that churned my stomach. It all felt very ham-fisted and an overstep on her part as a British author.
But, I still loved this book. This is a canonical M/M romance between two older russian guys, within the workings of a dangerous, secret nuclear radiated town, surrounded by a cruel and stifling government, and I really enjoyed it. I want to reread it already. it exceeded my expectations, where I had none. With some exceptions, the cadence of the writing felt very good. The progression of the romance was very believable for the time and place and it left me aching in the sweetest ways, reverently retracing favorite passages to reassure myself that yes, they really said or did that to each other, no, I'm not dreaming or wishfully thinking. Despite the bleakness of their lives I found myself smiling frequently and uncontrollably. To see their tenderness, their нежность prevail even in a stifling hostile environment, was indescribable.
Ultimately, I can't give an unbiased review, as a Russian reader. This hits something incredibly close to me, and will remain extremely special in my heart, but I think anyone with even a fleeting interest in radiation / nuclear disasters will enjoy this. The science was fascinating and exciting, and easy to follow. It also does a great job of painting the political climate of the KGB-era, and how some things still haven't changed in Russia as much as some might want to believe - how even today the only way to live a hopeful and fulfilling and honest life for many russians is to do what Valery does in the end. And while that fact left me pretty depressed, by no intention of the author no doubt, I'm still incredibly glad this book exists and I want to absorb into my very body so I can read it with every single fibre, cell, and neutron a hundred million times over.
[07/16/2022]
This Is How You Lose the Time War ★★★★☆ by Max Gladstone, Amal El-Mohta - F/F Time Travel Romance
Among the ashes of a dying world, an agent of the Commandant finds a letter. It reads: Burn before reading. Thus begins an unlikely correspondence between two rival agents hellbent on securing the best possible future for their warring factions. Now, what began as a taunt, a battlefield boast, grows into something more. Something epic. Something romantic. Something that could change the past and the future.
I haven't read a lot of F/F fiction but this easily takes the cake as my favorite. This novella is a quick read, but meaty with poetic, visceral expressions of love and desire. This is a riveting piece of work that had me thinking, wondering at the unraveling time-tangled plot, and hungrily drinking the text from each and every page. A work best experienced for yourself.
This Is How You Lose the Time War ★★★★☆ by Max Gladstone, Amal El-Mohta - F/F Time Travel Romance
Among the ashes of a dying world, an agent of the Commandant finds a letter. It reads: Burn before reading. Thus begins an unlikely correspondence between two rival agents hellbent on securing the best possible future for their warring factions. Now, what began as a taunt, a battlefield boast, grows into something more. Something epic. Something romantic. Something that could change the past and the future.
I haven't read a lot of F/F fiction but this easily takes the cake as my favorite. This novella is a quick read, but meaty with poetic, visceral expressions of love and desire. This is a riveting piece of work that had me thinking, wondering at the unraveling time-tangled plot, and hungrily drinking the text from each and every page. A work best experienced for yourself.
The Last Rune by Mark Anthony - Epic Fantasy + Urban Fantasy w/ slowburn M/M, Bi Male MC
content warning(s):
past suicide of a loved one, past CSA, past child prostitution, brief mention of fetal abortion, plague death and disease, attempted SA
Reality is unraveling in the dusty Colorado town of Castle City, drawing saloonkepper Travis Wilder and ER Doctor Grace Beckett into a shared destiny that finds them escaping for their lives into the otherworld of Eldh... a land of gods and monsters, myths and runecraft, conspiracy and blood. Travis and Grace must now save this strange land in order to safeguard their own world from an encroaching evil.
[06/22/2022]
Beyond the Pale ★★★★★
This book. This book. The words, the imagery, the characters, the mystery. There is so much life in this book -- everything from the weight and color of word choice, to the three-dimensional characters that feel as if at any moment they could walk off the page, and the careful, deliberate setup of a romance that took even me by surprise. I love this book. I love its handling of m/f friendships, its portrayal of complex relationships to the idea of being in a relationship, the emotional growth of the characters, the characters themselves -- all their little quirks and desires and faults, the way they mesh together and step up where another might falter, essentially creating an unlikely found family that teaches each other about love and warmth even while surrounded by dangerous life-threatening monsters and dark magic.
Above all I wasn't expecting its gentle messages of hope, of willfully choosing life, even when it's hard, even when it hurts. It's definitely a slower read, but I'm glad for the time it grants its characters to experience their lives fully, with all the love and pain that entails, and still see them come out victorious, even if that means they will never be the same again. Beyond The Pale hit pretty much every element I like to see in a book and still somehow kept surprising me in the best ways. Even the female characters have depth, and are some of my favorites in the fantasy genre as a whole. If you want a long, slowburn fantasy with an emphasis on character progression, and a heartwrenching m/m romance with a bi male lead, start here!
[06/28/2022]
The Keep of Fire ★★★★☆
One thing I really love about this series is how Travis and Grace are both two people in their 30s who have never been in a relationship. It's something I rarely see in fiction, and here we get two whole characters with intimacy issues and trauma! Their growing platonic friendship remains as one of my favorite elements in these books and I can't wait to see how it further develops. These books are increasingly about the Power of Friendship among traumatized adults and I am entirely here for it.
I also love how we got to find out more about homosexuality in Eldh this time, and to even see some good-natured jokes about it. Travis' developing romance continues to have my entire attention, as we follow him on his journey to opening his heart to the possibility of love. Travis, in general, is by far my favorite character. His quiet strength, his pain, the intense changes he continues to go through for the sake of the world(s), I can't wait to see how else he'll change and if he'll still be recognizable in the end. If he will still have the heart and means to chose peace.
Plot-wise, I really liked the light horror undertones going on this time, and the oppressive feeling and inescapable heat of the Burning Plague. The pacing was a bit slow at the start, but once it got going, it really kicked off. And the ending had me crawling up the wall in excitement for what was to come.
[07/09/2022]
The Dark Remains ★★★★☆
Beltan my dearly beloved. Every time a new character is introduced I think there's no way Mr. Anthony will make me care about them too. Or those background characters that showed up for .5 seconds two books ago. Right? Right? Wrong.
[11/28/2022] Blood of Mystery | [12/12/2022] The Gates of Winter | [01/10/2023] The First Stone
So, I stopped keeping track of notes and ratings for the rest of the series because I consumed it on such a personal and mind-melded level, but I loved it. Admittedly some of the later books aren't as strong as the first few in terms of pacing but I loved everything this series had to offer. I got so worked up at one point explaining to a friend about how much I loved Travis and Beltan that I may or may not have thrown up a little, and that's just one example of how these books affected me.
Handsdown one of my favorite series of all time even with its occasional dips in quality. It's not perfect, but there's so much heart here - so much personality and meaningful friendships and love. And there will always be a special place in my heart reserved for these books.
[06/22/2022]
Beyond the Pale ★★★★★
This book. This book. The words, the imagery, the characters, the mystery. There is so much life in this book -- everything from the weight and color of word choice, to the three-dimensional characters that feel as if at any moment they could walk off the page, and the careful, deliberate setup of a romance that took even me by surprise. I love this book. I love its handling of m/f friendships, its portrayal of complex relationships to the idea of being in a relationship, the emotional growth of the characters, the characters themselves -- all their little quirks and desires and faults, the way they mesh together and step up where another might falter, essentially creating an unlikely found family that teaches each other about love and warmth even while surrounded by dangerous life-threatening monsters and dark magic.
Above all I wasn't expecting its gentle messages of hope, of willfully choosing life, even when it's hard, even when it hurts. It's definitely a slower read, but I'm glad for the time it grants its characters to experience their lives fully, with all the love and pain that entails, and still see them come out victorious, even if that means they will never be the same again. Beyond The Pale hit pretty much every element I like to see in a book and still somehow kept surprising me in the best ways. Even the female characters have depth, and are some of my favorites in the fantasy genre as a whole. If you want a long, slowburn fantasy with an emphasis on character progression, and a heartwrenching m/m romance with a bi male lead, start here!
[06/28/2022]
The Keep of Fire ★★★★☆
One thing I really love about this series is how Travis and Grace are both two people in their 30s who have never been in a relationship. It's something I rarely see in fiction, and here we get two whole characters with intimacy issues and trauma! Their growing platonic friendship remains as one of my favorite elements in these books and I can't wait to see how it further develops. These books are increasingly about the Power of Friendship among traumatized adults and I am entirely here for it.
I also love how we got to find out more about homosexuality in Eldh this time, and to even see some good-natured jokes about it. Travis' developing romance continues to have my entire attention, as we follow him on his journey to opening his heart to the possibility of love. Travis, in general, is by far my favorite character. His quiet strength, his pain, the intense changes he continues to go through for the sake of the world(s), I can't wait to see how else he'll change and if he'll still be recognizable in the end. If he will still have the heart and means to chose peace.
Plot-wise, I really liked the light horror undertones going on this time, and the oppressive feeling and inescapable heat of the Burning Plague. The pacing was a bit slow at the start, but once it got going, it really kicked off. And the ending had me crawling up the wall in excitement for what was to come.
[07/09/2022]
The Dark Remains ★★★★☆
Beltan my dearly beloved. Every time a new character is introduced I think there's no way Mr. Anthony will make me care about them too. Or those background characters that showed up for .5 seconds two books ago. Right? Right? Wrong.
[11/28/2022] Blood of Mystery | [12/12/2022] The Gates of Winter | [01/10/2023] The First Stone
So, I stopped keeping track of notes and ratings for the rest of the series because I consumed it on such a personal and mind-melded level, but I loved it. Admittedly some of the later books aren't as strong as the first few in terms of pacing but I loved everything this series had to offer. I got so worked up at one point explaining to a friend about how much I loved Travis and Beltan that I may or may not have thrown up a little, and that's just one example of how these books affected me.
Handsdown one of my favorite series of all time even with its occasional dips in quality. It's not perfect, but there's so much heart here - so much personality and meaningful friendships and love. And there will always be a special place in my heart reserved for these books.
[06/22/2022]
Blackfish City ★☆☆☆☆ by Sam J. Miller - Dystopian Sci-fi with nb and gay MCs.
Blackfish City ★☆☆☆☆ by Sam J. Miller - Dystopian Sci-fi with nb and gay MCs.
content warning(s):
suicide ideation, not disclosing an STD before sex
After the climate wars, a floating city is constructed in the Arctic Circle. But lately the city is fraying along the edges--crime and corruption, incredible wealth alongside direst poverty, and a new disease called "the breaks" are all ravaging the population. When a strange new visitor arrives--a woman riding an orca, with a polar bear at her side--the city is entranced. This "orcamancer" will bring together four people--each living on the periphery--to stage unprecedented acts of resistance.
At first this book seemed promising - A floating city in the arctic with a mysterious outbreak illness? What in the world is an ocramancer? There's an honest-to-god nonbinary MC?
But this was one of the most painful drags of bad storytelling, awful plot, worse character development (devolvement? I hated every character by the end and not in a fun way) I have ever read. It had promising moments, sure, and a world I wanted to know more about. The setting is awesome, one that I think would do really well in a video game structure. But the story... I couldn't wait for it to be over. I was genuinely mad about how disappointing this ended up being. It also pissed me off how it dealt with suicidalness and disability in the most bleak way possible while touting itself as a 'very hopeful' book. Shut the hell up with that.
At first this book seemed promising - A floating city in the arctic with a mysterious outbreak illness? What in the world is an ocramancer? There's an honest-to-god nonbinary MC?
But this was one of the most painful drags of bad storytelling, awful plot, worse character development (devolvement? I hated every character by the end and not in a fun way) I have ever read. It had promising moments, sure, and a world I wanted to know more about. The setting is awesome, one that I think would do really well in a video game structure. But the story... I couldn't wait for it to be over. I was genuinely mad about how disappointing this ended up being. It also pissed me off how it dealt with suicidalness and disability in the most bleak way possible while touting itself as a 'very hopeful' book. Shut the hell up with that.
Smoke Trilogy by Tanya Huff - M/M Paranormal Urban Fantasy
content warning(s):
mentions of past homelessness and sex work, homophobia, suicide in book 2, graphic violence, cop characters
Tony Foster sees the world as it is. Which is why when a death occurs at the TV company he works at, he knows there is something a lot more sinister than natural causes behind the actor's untimely death. Something to do with shadows moving as they shouldn't - shadows that seem to have laid their claim on his unrequited crush, the show's handsome co-star Lee Nicholas.
[05/23/2022 - 06/10/2022]
Smoke and Shadows ★★☆☆☆ | Smoke and Mirrors ★★★☆☆ | Smoke and Ashes ★★★☆☆
The Smoke Trilogy is an urban fantasy set in Vancouver featuring paranormal horror, mystery, and dark humor - everything from killer shadows, ghosts, demons, and an ex-boyfriend who just so happens to be a vampire. At times cheesy and eye-roll worthy, there's enough blood and violence and possessive vampire behavior to balance it all out in a way that feels like a TV show that's so bad its good. After getting past my hiccup with the 1st book (bad pacing, bad jokes, way too much focus on boring TV details) I had a lot of fun with this series. I loved the relationship dynamics between all the characters, the slowburn romance subplot, character progression, and the way bi characters stayed bi no matter who they were with. Plus, the level of violence was a really fun counterpoint to the overall tone.
Are these books good? I'm not sure. But they are fun and they focus primarily on an openly gay character saving the world as gayly as possible, so for that it has my heart.
[05/23/2022 - 06/10/2022]
Smoke and Shadows ★★☆☆☆ | Smoke and Mirrors ★★★☆☆ | Smoke and Ashes ★★★☆☆
The Smoke Trilogy is an urban fantasy set in Vancouver featuring paranormal horror, mystery, and dark humor - everything from killer shadows, ghosts, demons, and an ex-boyfriend who just so happens to be a vampire. At times cheesy and eye-roll worthy, there's enough blood and violence and possessive vampire behavior to balance it all out in a way that feels like a TV show that's so bad its good. After getting past my hiccup with the 1st book (bad pacing, bad jokes, way too much focus on boring TV details) I had a lot of fun with this series. I loved the relationship dynamics between all the characters, the slowburn romance subplot, character progression, and the way bi characters stayed bi no matter who they were with. Plus, the level of violence was a really fun counterpoint to the overall tone.
Are these books good? I'm not sure. But they are fun and they focus primarily on an openly gay character saving the world as gayly as possible, so for that it has my heart.
[05/08/2022]
The Scottish Boy ★☆☆☆☆ by Alex de Campi - M/M Fantasy Erotica(?)
1333. Edward III is at war with Scotland. 19-year-old knight Sir Harry de Lyon yearns to prove himself in the war, and so jumps at the chance when a powerful baron invites him on a secret mission. They ride north, capturing the feral, half-starved boy within a crumbling keep and putting the other inhabitants to the sword. The goal of the mission is kept secret from Harry, even when the boy is given to him as a squire, with only two rules: don't let him escape, and convert him to the English cause. The price of failure? Forfeiting his small, heavily indebted estate to the Baron.
I'm giving this a 1 star because I think there's some entertainment value to be had in how bad it is. Also, the illustrations at the start of every chapter are really, really good. I don't regret buying a physical copy for the art alone, and the sheer insane experience of having read whatever the hell this is.
Apparently this is a repackage of a Stucky fanfic, which I only found out about after the fact. Had I known this beforehand I would not have even attempted to read this. My expectations thus were for a romantic fantasy with maybe some dark or violent elements. I expected Scottish themes, angst, politics. Fantastic landscapes and gruesome battles. Instead I got 80% bad sex, 10% wondering why this was titled the Scottish Boy when there is in fact no Scottish Boy to speak of, and 10% cheering whenever the two main characters hated each other too much to have sex.
I only recommend this to those who want a good laugh, a hearty cringe, and an absolutely absurd experience to tell your friends about.
The Scottish Boy ★☆☆☆☆ by Alex de Campi - M/M Fantasy Erotica(?)
1333. Edward III is at war with Scotland. 19-year-old knight Sir Harry de Lyon yearns to prove himself in the war, and so jumps at the chance when a powerful baron invites him on a secret mission. They ride north, capturing the feral, half-starved boy within a crumbling keep and putting the other inhabitants to the sword. The goal of the mission is kept secret from Harry, even when the boy is given to him as a squire, with only two rules: don't let him escape, and convert him to the English cause. The price of failure? Forfeiting his small, heavily indebted estate to the Baron.
I'm giving this a 1 star because I think there's some entertainment value to be had in how bad it is. Also, the illustrations at the start of every chapter are really, really good. I don't regret buying a physical copy for the art alone, and the sheer insane experience of having read whatever the hell this is.
Apparently this is a repackage of a Stucky fanfic, which I only found out about after the fact. Had I known this beforehand I would not have even attempted to read this. My expectations thus were for a romantic fantasy with maybe some dark or violent elements. I expected Scottish themes, angst, politics. Fantastic landscapes and gruesome battles. Instead I got 80% bad sex, 10% wondering why this was titled the Scottish Boy when there is in fact no Scottish Boy to speak of, and 10% cheering whenever the two main characters hated each other too much to have sex.
I only recommend this to those who want a good laugh, a hearty cringe, and an absolutely absurd experience to tell your friends about.
[05/03/2022]
The House in the Cerulean Sea ★★★★★ by TJ Klune - M/M Fantasy
A magical island. A dangerous task. A burning secret. Forty year old Linus Baker leads a quiet, solitary life. As a Case Worker at the Department in Charge Of Magical Youth, he spends his days overseeing the well-being of children in government-sanctioned orphanages. When Linus is unexpectedly given a highly classified assignment--travel to Marsyas Island Orphanage, where six dangerous children reside, Linus learns that the children aren’t the only secret the island keeps. Their caretaker is the charming Arthur Parnassus, who will do anything to keep his wards safe. As Arthur and Linus grow closer, long-held secrets are exposed, and Linus must make a choice: destroy a home or watch the world burn.
Heartlifting, comforting, emotional, refreshing, this book is a treasure. I was unsure at first, as a reader who typically gravitates to darker fiction, when the tone of this book resembled a pixar movie. But despite my hesitation I was enchanted. This is just such an enjoyable experience from start to finish, everything from Linus to the story to the handling of serious themes, the romance dynamic, the found family, the personalities of the children, I loved every element.
The House in the Cerulean Sea ★★★★★ by TJ Klune - M/M Fantasy
A magical island. A dangerous task. A burning secret. Forty year old Linus Baker leads a quiet, solitary life. As a Case Worker at the Department in Charge Of Magical Youth, he spends his days overseeing the well-being of children in government-sanctioned orphanages. When Linus is unexpectedly given a highly classified assignment--travel to Marsyas Island Orphanage, where six dangerous children reside, Linus learns that the children aren’t the only secret the island keeps. Their caretaker is the charming Arthur Parnassus, who will do anything to keep his wards safe. As Arthur and Linus grow closer, long-held secrets are exposed, and Linus must make a choice: destroy a home or watch the world burn.
Heartlifting, comforting, emotional, refreshing, this book is a treasure. I was unsure at first, as a reader who typically gravitates to darker fiction, when the tone of this book resembled a pixar movie. But despite my hesitation I was enchanted. This is just such an enjoyable experience from start to finish, everything from Linus to the story to the handling of serious themes, the romance dynamic, the found family, the personalities of the children, I loved every element.
[04/07/2022]
The Door Into Fire ★★★★☆ by Diane Duane - M/M M/F M/Other Polyam High Fantasy Romance
The Door Into Fire ★★★★☆ by Diane Duane - M/M M/F M/Other Polyam High Fantasy Romance
content warning(s):
grief, cheating, suicide attempt
Herewiss is the only man in centuries to possess the Power of the blue Flame, but he can't use or control it -- not even to help his dearest friend, Freelorn, exiled prince of Arlen. After endless failed attempts at unlocking his Power, his time is running short, and he must embark on his own quest to the forbidding ancient castle that may finally make him whole...
Any book that can be summed up as "it's about love, actually" is going to be a good read for me. My favorite thing about this book was the presence of an established relationship between Herewiss and Freelorn. It's not something I get to see often in fiction and for a while it had me wondering if their relationship would be relegated to minor flavor text, a small detail that wouldn't play a big part either way. How glad I was to be wrong about that. Not only is their relationship emotional and tender and withstands the test of time, it's frequently pulled to the very forefront. We linger on their feelings for each other, their love and fears and struggles. They're also both bi and there are obvious polyam elements that I enjoyed. As if that wasn't enough, there's also a cool genderfluid elemental who is also sometimes a horse.
I did find this to be a slow read at times, as meandering and languid as retro fantasy tends to be. There's a ton of worldbuilding and lore given to you at all times but by the end of it I really enjoyed my time here. As someone who enjoys pre-2000s fantasy it was really nice to see a complex m/m relationship in tandem with all the swords and sorcery, and the ending left me feeling really, really good.
Any book that can be summed up as "it's about love, actually" is going to be a good read for me. My favorite thing about this book was the presence of an established relationship between Herewiss and Freelorn. It's not something I get to see often in fiction and for a while it had me wondering if their relationship would be relegated to minor flavor text, a small detail that wouldn't play a big part either way. How glad I was to be wrong about that. Not only is their relationship emotional and tender and withstands the test of time, it's frequently pulled to the very forefront. We linger on their feelings for each other, their love and fears and struggles. They're also both bi and there are obvious polyam elements that I enjoyed. As if that wasn't enough, there's also a cool genderfluid elemental who is also sometimes a horse.
I did find this to be a slow read at times, as meandering and languid as retro fantasy tends to be. There's a ton of worldbuilding and lore given to you at all times but by the end of it I really enjoyed my time here. As someone who enjoys pre-2000s fantasy it was really nice to see a complex m/m relationship in tandem with all the swords and sorcery, and the ending left me feeling really, really good.
Sasha Masha ★★★☆☆ by Agnes Borinsky - Transfemme MC / Contemporary YA
Alex feels like he isn't a real person. Then comes along Tracy, who finally makes him feel like a Real Boy. But it is not enough. Something is missing. As Alex grapples with his identity, he finds himself trying on dresses and swiping on lipstick in the quiet of his bedroom. He meets Andre, a gay boy who is beautiful and unafraid to be who he is. Slowly, Alex begins to realize: maybe his name isn't Alex at all. Maybe it's Sasha Masha.
What I liked about this book is that our MC, our beloved Sasha Masha is still figuring out the whole gender thing. He's transfemme but still uses he/him pronouns and I really liked seeing the beginning stages of transness in a character that wasn't full of misery. This book definitely dips into the sad category at times but it isn't a sad book, and it also doesn't feel catered to cis readers. This is a book written by a trans woman and it very much feels like it was written for young questioning trans people as a source of comfort, of honesty, of patience, of encouragement, of the importance of having other queer and trans friends, and remembering that you aren't the first trans person to have existed. It's a book about community, about self discovery and the messy but necessary steps we take to be who we really are. And I enjoyed that leagues more than most of the other trans coming out fiction I've read.
What I liked about this book is that our MC, our beloved Sasha Masha is still figuring out the whole gender thing. He's transfemme but still uses he/him pronouns and I really liked seeing the beginning stages of transness in a character that wasn't full of misery. This book definitely dips into the sad category at times but it isn't a sad book, and it also doesn't feel catered to cis readers. This is a book written by a trans woman and it very much feels like it was written for young questioning trans people as a source of comfort, of honesty, of patience, of encouragement, of the importance of having other queer and trans friends, and remembering that you aren't the first trans person to have existed. It's a book about community, about self discovery and the messy but necessary steps we take to be who we really are. And I enjoyed that leagues more than most of the other trans coming out fiction I've read.
[03/03/2022]
The Still ★★★★★ by David Feintuch - M/M Medieval Political/Military Fantasy
The Still ★★★★★ by David Feintuch - M/M Medieval Political/Military Fantasy
content warning(s):
misogyny, attempted r*pe, offscreen r*pe, attempted suicide
Prince Rodrigo was born to rule--or was he? The spoiled young heir of Caldeon has paid scant heed to duty, compassion, or the power he must weild...and the Queen's death leaves him a hunted outlaw. To claim his throne, Roddy needs allies. To win them, he must learn to rule. To rule, he must command The Still, the ancient Power of Caledon. But first he must rule himself. For to become a King, Rodrigo must first become a man...
It's very impressive when an author gives us a very unlikable character and still manages to make me care for him deeply. Prince Roddy is as bratty as they come. He's a spoiled prince with anger issues and no value for the lives and feelings of those he deems beneath him -- which is just about everyone. And yet. In the prologue we see him weep with joy over a horse gifted to him by his dear friend Rustin, and from that moment on I believed in him. I loved him, and wanted to see him grow into a mature, honest King. No matter how excruciating the journey would be.
The writing in this book is superb. Never was there a dull moment. The language and dialogue is incredibly immersive for a medieval story and delightful to read. I loved the politics, the world, the magic. But above all the most precious thing about this book is Rustin, Roddy's dearest friend. He is without parallel my favorite character and the complex, multi-layered relationship he builds with Prince Roddy was some of the most interesting, riveting stuff I've read. Now, I wouldn't recommend this to anyone looking for a traditional romance. But for what it is, I loved the complexity presented here. Their relationship is messy and rocky and deep as the ocean. They are the sun and moon to each other, but their road together is one full of pain. And as badly as I wanted to see them kiss, I enjoyed how different their relationship is. It's unique to them. It's breathtaking. I couldn't tear my eyes away. It filled me with anguish and joy, smiles and despair, never knowing what would happen next. And perhaps most importantly it left me thinking, which is one of the greatest gifts a book can give.
It's very impressive when an author gives us a very unlikable character and still manages to make me care for him deeply. Prince Roddy is as bratty as they come. He's a spoiled prince with anger issues and no value for the lives and feelings of those he deems beneath him -- which is just about everyone. And yet. In the prologue we see him weep with joy over a horse gifted to him by his dear friend Rustin, and from that moment on I believed in him. I loved him, and wanted to see him grow into a mature, honest King. No matter how excruciating the journey would be.
The writing in this book is superb. Never was there a dull moment. The language and dialogue is incredibly immersive for a medieval story and delightful to read. I loved the politics, the world, the magic. But above all the most precious thing about this book is Rustin, Roddy's dearest friend. He is without parallel my favorite character and the complex, multi-layered relationship he builds with Prince Roddy was some of the most interesting, riveting stuff I've read. Now, I wouldn't recommend this to anyone looking for a traditional romance. But for what it is, I loved the complexity presented here. Their relationship is messy and rocky and deep as the ocean. They are the sun and moon to each other, but their road together is one full of pain. And as badly as I wanted to see them kiss, I enjoyed how different their relationship is. It's unique to them. It's breathtaking. I couldn't tear my eyes away. It filled me with anguish and joy, smiles and despair, never knowing what would happen next. And perhaps most importantly it left me thinking, which is one of the greatest gifts a book can give.
The King ★★★★★
content warning(s):
grief, character death, child prostitution
Ooooh Rustin. Oh Rodrigo. This one hurt. This one had me sweating and crying and frantically sending photos of pages to my dear friend realtime because I couldn't go through this alone. There's so much. So very much to pick apart and examine and consider. Sure, there's a lot more battles in this book. There's bloodshed and politics and Rodrigo painstakingly coming into his role of King. But it's also about Rodrigo's love for Rustin, as he finds himself unable to shy away from it any longer. To make excuses for it. To suppress it.
Roddy's character development is so satisfying to read on multiple accounts--the relationships he builds, the decisions he makes, the maturity he earns, all of it is very riveting. But what struck me the most was the depth to which he finally understood his feelings, and what it took to get there. This is a love story about two young men who each love the other more than anyone, in his own unique way, and one no less than the other for it. My one and only complaint lies in the fact that there isn't a third book, but there's enough here to occupy my heart and mind for a long time to come, and I am so grateful for this experience. This series touched me, and opened my eyes to a whole new level of enjoyment I thought too good to be true.
Roddy's character development is so satisfying to read on multiple accounts--the relationships he builds, the decisions he makes, the maturity he earns, all of it is very riveting. But what struck me the most was the depth to which he finally understood his feelings, and what it took to get there. This is a love story about two young men who each love the other more than anyone, in his own unique way, and one no less than the other for it. My one and only complaint lies in the fact that there isn't a third book, but there's enough here to occupy my heart and mind for a long time to come, and I am so grateful for this experience. This series touched me, and opened my eyes to a whole new level of enjoyment I thought too good to be true.
[02/25/2022]
Strange Fortune ★★★☆☆ by Josh Lanyon - M/M Historical Fantasy Romance
Valentine Strange needs money. When he receives a job from the Holy Orders to retrieve a Goddess' diadem from an ancient temple deep in the mountainous jungle—the pay is too good for Strange to refuse. But when Master Aleister Grimshaw, a dangerous witch from a traitorous lineage, joins the expedition, Strange begins to suspect that more is at stake than the retrieval of a mere relic.
Mutual dislike and forced companionship to loyal friends to lovers -- that's what we get in this adventure story full of jungle temples, a sacred artifact, and an ancient evil.
Looking beyond the myriad of typos and proofreading errors, this was an enjoyable read. I liked the setting, the characters, the pacing, and I went through it much faster than I thought I would. My qualms are minor; some of the politics were confusing, and there were several interesting concepts that didn't get enough elaboration, or weren't mentioned at all until the very end. The magic scenes in particular weren't very detailed compared to other fantasies, but having said all that I still really liked this one. It's a fun adventure with a cute romance, and I especially liked having an older protagonist. Overall a solid, good book.
Strange Fortune ★★★☆☆ by Josh Lanyon - M/M Historical Fantasy Romance
Valentine Strange needs money. When he receives a job from the Holy Orders to retrieve a Goddess' diadem from an ancient temple deep in the mountainous jungle—the pay is too good for Strange to refuse. But when Master Aleister Grimshaw, a dangerous witch from a traitorous lineage, joins the expedition, Strange begins to suspect that more is at stake than the retrieval of a mere relic.
Mutual dislike and forced companionship to loyal friends to lovers -- that's what we get in this adventure story full of jungle temples, a sacred artifact, and an ancient evil.
Looking beyond the myriad of typos and proofreading errors, this was an enjoyable read. I liked the setting, the characters, the pacing, and I went through it much faster than I thought I would. My qualms are minor; some of the politics were confusing, and there were several interesting concepts that didn't get enough elaboration, or weren't mentioned at all until the very end. The magic scenes in particular weren't very detailed compared to other fantasies, but having said all that I still really liked this one. It's a fun adventure with a cute romance, and I especially liked having an older protagonist. Overall a solid, good book.
[02/21/2022]
River of Teeth ★☆☆☆☆ by Sarah Gailey - M/NB Alt History Fiction
Contained within this volume is an 1890s America that might have been: a bayou overrun by feral hippos and mercenary hippo wranglers from around the globe. It is the story of Winslow Houndstooth and his crew. It is the story of their fortunes. It is the story of his revenge.
I liked this book at first. I like the premise, I liked the setup, I liked the introduction of each of the characters. But once they all converged it somehow turned into a sloppy diversity soup that could not hold a compelling plot and could not keep my interest in any of it. This book includes a somewhat diverse cast, which is great, sure, and I would have loved to read a southern historical fiction about this exact set of theoretical characters and concept.... if it had been good.
I struggle to find traits to describe the characters outside of their diversity checkmarks, and the complete lack of pushback for any of their identities completely took me out of the immersion. Sure, I'm reading about an alternate history where America went through with its plan to introduce hippos into its Southern swamplands. But the most unrealistic part by far was the way every single character in this book somehow innately understood to use neutral pronouns for the nb/genderless character Hero, even when they'd literally never met Hero before. This would not happen in modern day America, much less in the 1890s. And the worst part is that Hero never got to clearly say any words about their gender at any time. Everyone just automatically, preemptively gets it somehow? Even as a reader I don't know the right language to describe them. Are they nb, genderless, or something else entirely? I want to know, I want to know the deep depths of this character and core individuality that makes them tick. But I guess that's not important enough to dive into, even in a book that means to tout diversity front and center. I also have a problem with how Hero never gets any physical descriptions beyond their dark skin. How old are they? What kind of clothes do they wear? What does their smile look like? Their hair at the very least? We get nothing. I've never seen such a severe lack of physical descriptors for a love interest in my life!
And that's not the only place we get nothing. The 'romance' between Hero and Houndstooth starts out sweet and tentative and I was really looking forward to seeing where it would go. But when they finally 'get together' it happens entirely behind closed doors. There's no fade to black scene, there's no conversation about feelings, there's literally nothing. And I'm supposed to believe Houndstooth was profoundly changed by his feelings for Hero? When we never get to see any of it? It drove me wild. I ended up speed-reading through the end, feeling not very invested anymore.
It's a good, interesting, unique concept that fails to deliver on almost every front. It had some good scenes, and I did like the first part of the book at times. But when your main antagonist (who is written to be unlikable!) ends up being the most interesting, consistent and entertaining character of them all... I'm left feeling lost and disappointed.
River of Teeth ★☆☆☆☆ by Sarah Gailey - M/NB Alt History Fiction
Contained within this volume is an 1890s America that might have been: a bayou overrun by feral hippos and mercenary hippo wranglers from around the globe. It is the story of Winslow Houndstooth and his crew. It is the story of their fortunes. It is the story of his revenge.
I liked this book at first. I like the premise, I liked the setup, I liked the introduction of each of the characters. But once they all converged it somehow turned into a sloppy diversity soup that could not hold a compelling plot and could not keep my interest in any of it. This book includes a somewhat diverse cast, which is great, sure, and I would have loved to read a southern historical fiction about this exact set of theoretical characters and concept.... if it had been good.
I struggle to find traits to describe the characters outside of their diversity checkmarks, and the complete lack of pushback for any of their identities completely took me out of the immersion. Sure, I'm reading about an alternate history where America went through with its plan to introduce hippos into its Southern swamplands. But the most unrealistic part by far was the way every single character in this book somehow innately understood to use neutral pronouns for the nb/genderless character Hero, even when they'd literally never met Hero before. This would not happen in modern day America, much less in the 1890s. And the worst part is that Hero never got to clearly say any words about their gender at any time. Everyone just automatically, preemptively gets it somehow? Even as a reader I don't know the right language to describe them. Are they nb, genderless, or something else entirely? I want to know, I want to know the deep depths of this character and core individuality that makes them tick. But I guess that's not important enough to dive into, even in a book that means to tout diversity front and center. I also have a problem with how Hero never gets any physical descriptions beyond their dark skin. How old are they? What kind of clothes do they wear? What does their smile look like? Their hair at the very least? We get nothing. I've never seen such a severe lack of physical descriptors for a love interest in my life!
And that's not the only place we get nothing. The 'romance' between Hero and Houndstooth starts out sweet and tentative and I was really looking forward to seeing where it would go. But when they finally 'get together' it happens entirely behind closed doors. There's no fade to black scene, there's no conversation about feelings, there's literally nothing. And I'm supposed to believe Houndstooth was profoundly changed by his feelings for Hero? When we never get to see any of it? It drove me wild. I ended up speed-reading through the end, feeling not very invested anymore.
It's a good, interesting, unique concept that fails to deliver on almost every front. It had some good scenes, and I did like the first part of the book at times. But when your main antagonist (who is written to be unlikable!) ends up being the most interesting, consistent and entertaining character of them all... I'm left feeling lost and disappointed.
[02/13/2022]
The Rifter ★★★★☆ by Ginn Hale - M/M Fantasy Romance
The Rifter ★★★★☆ by Ginn Hale - M/M Fantasy Romance
content warning(s):
character death, near suicide attempt, violence, animal death, offscreen r*pe, homophobia
When John opens a letter addressed to his missing roommate, Kyle, he expects to find a house key, but instead he is swept into a strange realm of magic, mysticism, revolutionaries and assassins. Though he struggles to escape, John is drawn steadily closer to a fate he shares with Kyle—to wake the destroyer god, the Rifter, and shatter a world.
At first I wasn't sure if I was going to like this series. "Modern day average guy gets transported to a magical fantasy realm" isn't a concept that typically holds my attention. But almost immediately it becomes apparent that there is so much more beneath the surface of this story, something that unfurls itself in the most vicious, heartbreaking way. This story gets dark. It tore at my emotions and kept me up late at night staring at my ceiling. It filled me with adrenaline and took my breath away. And despite all the pain and agony, I enjoyed myself at every turn of the page and twist of the knife. Ginn Hale has created an enjoyable, expansive story full of depth, loss, and love. The carefully crafted structure hooked me in beyond my belief and dragged me through brambles and honey alike and I loved every second of it. It's horrifying. It's shockingly romantic. I never wanted it to end. And despite the length of this impressive 10-part series I'm already greatly looking forward to an inevitable reread.
Now, I wouldn't say this series is perfect. It has its moments where I had to shake my head at the dialogue and sections where it seems to lose its pacing. But none of that takes away from the overall enjoyment of this journey of a read. The care and detail that went into this is a rarity in the realm of gay fiction, and it is truly a joy to witness. This will definitely go down as one of my favorite gay series of all time.
At first I wasn't sure if I was going to like this series. "Modern day average guy gets transported to a magical fantasy realm" isn't a concept that typically holds my attention. But almost immediately it becomes apparent that there is so much more beneath the surface of this story, something that unfurls itself in the most vicious, heartbreaking way. This story gets dark. It tore at my emotions and kept me up late at night staring at my ceiling. It filled me with adrenaline and took my breath away. And despite all the pain and agony, I enjoyed myself at every turn of the page and twist of the knife. Ginn Hale has created an enjoyable, expansive story full of depth, loss, and love. The carefully crafted structure hooked me in beyond my belief and dragged me through brambles and honey alike and I loved every second of it. It's horrifying. It's shockingly romantic. I never wanted it to end. And despite the length of this impressive 10-part series I'm already greatly looking forward to an inevitable reread.
Now, I wouldn't say this series is perfect. It has its moments where I had to shake my head at the dialogue and sections where it seems to lose its pacing. But none of that takes away from the overall enjoyment of this journey of a read. The care and detail that went into this is a rarity in the realm of gay fiction, and it is truly a joy to witness. This will definitely go down as one of my favorite gay series of all time.
[01/27/2022]
The Blade Between ★★★★☆ by Sam J. Miller - Supernatural Thriller with a Gay MC
The Blade Between ★★★★☆ by Sam J. Miller - Supernatural Thriller with a Gay MC
content warning(s):
violence, suicide, substance abuse and addiction, brief depiction of pedophilia and rape.
A frightening and uncanny ghost story about a rapidly changing city in upstate New York and the mysterious forces that threaten it. When Ronan returns to his hometown of Hudson he reconnects with Dom, his first love, and Dom's wife, Attalah. But the spirits entwined with this once-thriving industrial town are enraged, hate and violence are bubbling out of its residents, and everything is spiraling out of control. Ronan must do everything he can to save the city he once loathed.
This is a story about ghosts and whales and the anger embedded deep in the flesh of a gay man. It's also about landlords and history and a town where time moves strangely. I really, really liked the execution of this story. The prose was engaging, the flow was great, I never knew what was going to happen next and I really enjoyed this unique telling of a thriller that felt entirely original. The imagery was vivid and the characters were compelling and complexly human. The only thing I didn't like about this book was the prevalence of social media, I don't like to be reminded of twitter's existence when I'm reading a book, but that's just personal taste. As the story unfolds its presence makes a lot of sense and I didn't mind it so much.
This is definitely a heavier read, I had to take a few breaks here and there to disengage, but I always came back for the intriguing story and magical mystery. I also really appreciated the presence of older protagonists and class conflict. Overall an interesting read full of miserable characters trying to do what they think is 'right', in a strange, mysterious town with a blood-soaked history. I'm very excited to read more from this author.
This is a story about ghosts and whales and the anger embedded deep in the flesh of a gay man. It's also about landlords and history and a town where time moves strangely. I really, really liked the execution of this story. The prose was engaging, the flow was great, I never knew what was going to happen next and I really enjoyed this unique telling of a thriller that felt entirely original. The imagery was vivid and the characters were compelling and complexly human. The only thing I didn't like about this book was the prevalence of social media, I don't like to be reminded of twitter's existence when I'm reading a book, but that's just personal taste. As the story unfolds its presence makes a lot of sense and I didn't mind it so much.
This is definitely a heavier read, I had to take a few breaks here and there to disengage, but I always came back for the intriguing story and magical mystery. I also really appreciated the presence of older protagonists and class conflict. Overall an interesting read full of miserable characters trying to do what they think is 'right', in a strange, mysterious town with a blood-soaked history. I'm very excited to read more from this author.
[01/21/2022]
Green Labyrinth ★★☆☆☆ by Alex Foure - M/M Fantasy
Green Labyrinth ★★☆☆☆ by Alex Foure - M/M Fantasy
content warning(s):
A lot of Dubcon
Darius Lucilius, war hero and military commander, is sent to the island of Hibernia to add it to the Roman Empire's territories. But after Darius' fort is destroyed by an enemy tribe his life is saved by Fionn, a mysterious Celtic warrior hiding more than one secret. He finds himself drawn to Fionn even as Rome's fortunes in Hibernia grow increasingly dire.
Full disclosure, I only read 2 out of the 3 books and have no plans to read the third book.
I was very close to giving this a one star. But I did like some of the concepts presented and I think this could have been an interesting story had it been presented differently. There are good ideas here, but the storytelling itself struggles to shine. It reads like mid-level fanfiction at best and a classic case of stockholm syndrome at worst. The inhuman morally corrupt white-haired love interest was the most interesting part of these books but he alone could not make up for a story that rarely utilized the interesting setting it set up. I didn't like the structure or the romance or the weird dubcon orgy in the very intro. Or the depiction of Celtics as violently homophobic. Just, no thank you.
Full disclosure, I only read 2 out of the 3 books and have no plans to read the third book.
I was very close to giving this a one star. But I did like some of the concepts presented and I think this could have been an interesting story had it been presented differently. There are good ideas here, but the storytelling itself struggles to shine. It reads like mid-level fanfiction at best and a classic case of stockholm syndrome at worst. The inhuman morally corrupt white-haired love interest was the most interesting part of these books but he alone could not make up for a story that rarely utilized the interesting setting it set up. I didn't like the structure or the romance or the weird dubcon orgy in the very intro. Or the depiction of Celtics as violently homophobic. Just, no thank you.
[11/09/2021]
The Faerie Hounds of York ★★★★★ by Arden Powell - M/M Historical Fantasy
The Faerie Hounds of York ★★★★★ by Arden Powell - M/M Historical Fantasy
content warning(s):
discussions of homosexuality as sin
England, 1810. William Loxley is cursed. A pale and monstrous creature haunts his dreams, luring him from London to the desolate, gray landscape of his forgotten childhood. His only hope of escaping the creature's grasp lies with John Thorncress, a dark and windswept stranger met on the moors. The longer Loxley stays in Thorncress' company, the harder it becomes to fight his attraction to the man... But Thorncress has his own dark ties to Faerie, ties that may threaten both their souls.
This is a self-published story about fae creatures and dangerous folklore, unexpected romance and devoted promises. It's a very rare thing for me to start and finish a book in a single day, but I was enchanted by The Faerie Hounds of York from the very beginning. The prose is highly visual, but very well-paced, taking you through the gloomy English moors and dream-like fairy worlds with ease. The characters are immediately mysterious and charming, drawing you into their problems and desires until you're sat in bed past midnight and you close the final page with tears streaming down your face.
I loved every bit of this book. It's hard to pick a favorite part out of the many, many beautifully written passages. Halfway through reading I had to stop everything and look up the author to see which of their other books I could get my hands on next. The ending was entirely unexpected, but I can't say I didn't enjoy it. It felt new and interesting and it really sunk its claws in me with one last, great, heart-wrenching effort. It's a captivating ride from start to finish and I know I'm going to be recommending this one for a long time to come.
This is a self-published story about fae creatures and dangerous folklore, unexpected romance and devoted promises. It's a very rare thing for me to start and finish a book in a single day, but I was enchanted by The Faerie Hounds of York from the very beginning. The prose is highly visual, but very well-paced, taking you through the gloomy English moors and dream-like fairy worlds with ease. The characters are immediately mysterious and charming, drawing you into their problems and desires until you're sat in bed past midnight and you close the final page with tears streaming down your face.
I loved every bit of this book. It's hard to pick a favorite part out of the many, many beautifully written passages. Halfway through reading I had to stop everything and look up the author to see which of their other books I could get my hands on next. The ending was entirely unexpected, but I can't say I didn't enjoy it. It felt new and interesting and it really sunk its claws in me with one last, great, heart-wrenching effort. It's a captivating ride from start to finish and I know I'm going to be recommending this one for a long time to come.
[10/29/2021]
Dark Rise ★★★★☆ by C. S. Pacat - M/M (+ M/F) Dark Fantasy YA
The ancient world of magic is no more. Only the Stewards remain to remember the great battles of Light and Dark, sworn to protect humanity if the Dark King ever returns. But as the King's presence begins to stir in London, sixteen-year-old Will learns of his destiny to fight alongside the Stewards in the oncoming war against the Dark.
The return of the queen. It's no secret that the Captive Prince trilogy remains one of my top favorite works of M/M fiction, so of course when I saw Pacat was working on a new series I knew I had to read it as soon as it came out. There was quite a bit of trepidation on my part with this being a YA set in London--two of my least favorite things to read about--but I knew no matter what I had to experience her level of storytelling and romance again, because no one does it quite like Pacat.
Now having read the book I do think it suffers from a few of the pitfalls of YA: stagnant passages that over-explain, jarring moments of childish actions in an otherwise mature world (I'm looking at you Elizabeth), and repitetive worldbuilding exposition. The first half of this book suffered the most for this. While there were a few outstanding scenes, I felt the first half to be a slog, and my interest was not fully captured. I struggled to stay invested. However, that all changed with chapter 20, and especially chapter 21. This is the moment when Dark Rise finally felt like a C. S. Pacat novel. Drama, intrigue, dialogue that grips you and stays with you, characters that feel alive and multi-faceted, plot twists that leave you dizzy--this is where the book fully drove itself into my heart and stayed there to the very last word.
One of my favorite things about this book is how dark it got at times, which is great for a book called Dark Rise, but I was pleasantly surprised with the level of it considering this is a YA. Also, a lot of LGBT books marketed as 'dark' tend to fall into the trope of focusing on sexual assault as a way of making the story 'dark'. Captive Prince obviously did this, as well as many other books on this page. Dark Rise does not, and that really got me excited because dark fantasy is one of my favorite things to read about, but the aforementioned trope makes it really difficult to find books I can fully enjoy and love. Dark Rise manages to be dark without relying on sexual violence, and it does it very, very well.
Without spoiling anything, I love the story Pacat has set up for us here, and I'm dying to know where she'll take us in the next books. The final pages were painfully divine and I struggle to guess what could possibly be in store, but I trust her vision. My only qualm is that I wish I could give this a five-star, but that first half really did not click with me. Here's hoping that the next book gets a release date soon!!
Dark Rise ★★★★☆ by C. S. Pacat - M/M (+ M/F) Dark Fantasy YA
The ancient world of magic is no more. Only the Stewards remain to remember the great battles of Light and Dark, sworn to protect humanity if the Dark King ever returns. But as the King's presence begins to stir in London, sixteen-year-old Will learns of his destiny to fight alongside the Stewards in the oncoming war against the Dark.
The return of the queen. It's no secret that the Captive Prince trilogy remains one of my top favorite works of M/M fiction, so of course when I saw Pacat was working on a new series I knew I had to read it as soon as it came out. There was quite a bit of trepidation on my part with this being a YA set in London--two of my least favorite things to read about--but I knew no matter what I had to experience her level of storytelling and romance again, because no one does it quite like Pacat.
Now having read the book I do think it suffers from a few of the pitfalls of YA: stagnant passages that over-explain, jarring moments of childish actions in an otherwise mature world (I'm looking at you Elizabeth), and repitetive worldbuilding exposition. The first half of this book suffered the most for this. While there were a few outstanding scenes, I felt the first half to be a slog, and my interest was not fully captured. I struggled to stay invested. However, that all changed with chapter 20, and especially chapter 21. This is the moment when Dark Rise finally felt like a C. S. Pacat novel. Drama, intrigue, dialogue that grips you and stays with you, characters that feel alive and multi-faceted, plot twists that leave you dizzy--this is where the book fully drove itself into my heart and stayed there to the very last word.
One of my favorite things about this book is how dark it got at times, which is great for a book called Dark Rise, but I was pleasantly surprised with the level of it considering this is a YA. Also, a lot of LGBT books marketed as 'dark' tend to fall into the trope of focusing on sexual assault as a way of making the story 'dark'. Captive Prince obviously did this, as well as many other books on this page. Dark Rise does not, and that really got me excited because dark fantasy is one of my favorite things to read about, but the aforementioned trope makes it really difficult to find books I can fully enjoy and love. Dark Rise manages to be dark without relying on sexual violence, and it does it very, very well.
Without spoiling anything, I love the story Pacat has set up for us here, and I'm dying to know where she'll take us in the next books. The final pages were painfully divine and I struggle to guess what could possibly be in store, but I trust her vision. My only qualm is that I wish I could give this a five-star, but that first half really did not click with me. Here's hoping that the next book gets a release date soon!!
[10/06/2021]
A Lesson In Thorns ★★★☆☆ by Sierra Simone - M/F/M/F/F/M Polyam Erotica
A Lesson In Thorns ★★★☆☆ by Sierra Simone - M/F/M/F/F/M Polyam Erotica
content warning(s):
off-screen sexual violence that happened in the past, and is recounted briefly in text.
An original fairy tale full of ancient mysteries, lantern-lit rituals, jealousy, money, murder, sacred torment, and obsessions that last for lifetimes... A Lesson in Thorns is the first of four books in the Thornchapel series.
Ok, I don't normally read erotica for its own sake. Certainly not erotica featuring a six-person polycule. But there's more to this book than steamy celtic orgies and everyone being horny on main at all times. First, there's the mystery of the MC's missing mother. Where did she go? Why did she go? No one knows, but our MC is determined to find out. So she goes to the last known place her mother was known to have been - Thornchapel, a massive gothic estate owned by her childhood friend who she ceremoniously got married to when she was ten years old, along with one other boy, with their three mutual friends as witness.
I can't say this was my book of the year. It required copious amounts of suspension of belief on my part, and I can't say I personally get any enjoyment out of BDSM scenes, of which this book has several. But I still liked the story, and most importantly, the characters. Even if some of the tropes present erred on the cusp of frustration, I wanted to see how these six individuals would inevitably connect. And connect they did, in a scene unlike anything I can say to have read before. With that said, I was particuarly pleased with the emphasis on bisexuality present not only in the main character, but also the two men she's in love with, who are also complicatedly attracted to each other. Their love triangle (of sorts) was definitely my favorite part.
I want to read more polyam books. Preferably ones that are a few degrees colder on the horny scale. But this was a decently fun read if you're looking for something casual, and at times, sexy with an air of feverish devotion.
Ok, I don't normally read erotica for its own sake. Certainly not erotica featuring a six-person polycule. But there's more to this book than steamy celtic orgies and everyone being horny on main at all times. First, there's the mystery of the MC's missing mother. Where did she go? Why did she go? No one knows, but our MC is determined to find out. So she goes to the last known place her mother was known to have been - Thornchapel, a massive gothic estate owned by her childhood friend who she ceremoniously got married to when she was ten years old, along with one other boy, with their three mutual friends as witness.
I can't say this was my book of the year. It required copious amounts of suspension of belief on my part, and I can't say I personally get any enjoyment out of BDSM scenes, of which this book has several. But I still liked the story, and most importantly, the characters. Even if some of the tropes present erred on the cusp of frustration, I wanted to see how these six individuals would inevitably connect. And connect they did, in a scene unlike anything I can say to have read before. With that said, I was particuarly pleased with the emphasis on bisexuality present not only in the main character, but also the two men she's in love with, who are also complicatedly attracted to each other. Their love triangle (of sorts) was definitely my favorite part.
I want to read more polyam books. Preferably ones that are a few degrees colder on the horny scale. But this was a decently fun read if you're looking for something casual, and at times, sexy with an air of feverish devotion.
The Lotus Kingdoms by Elizabeth Bear - M/F Adult Fantasy with Trans Characters
content warning(s):
Suicidal Thoughts, Transphobia, Big age gap
The Gage is a brass automaton created around the core of a human being. He is carrying a message from the most powerful sorcerer of Messaline across a dangerous mountain pass to the Rajni of the Lotus Kingdom. With him is The Dead Man, his friend and protector.
This is technically a sequel series to the Eternal Sky trilogy, which I did not read.
This is technically a sequel series to the Eternal Sky trilogy, which I did not read.
[09/09/2021]
the stone in the skull ★★☆☆☆
the stone in the skull ★★☆☆☆
I'd give this more of a 2.5, because I did love the first half. I've been struggling to find the passion to read lately, but I ate up the first half of The Stone in the Skull like it was nothing. I loved the opening scene, the strange world and even stranger characters, and the words Bear uses to weave her beautiful fantasy settings. But somewhere in the middle I found the dialogue taking jarring turns, the characters making strange decisions that hardly made sense, and worst of all I was hit with a devoted and loyal romance that bloomed from... first sight? I felt like everything I had so far learned about the characters was flipped on its head and natural character development and progression didn't matter.
And I have to talk about the trans characters. At first, I was all about it. I loved Sayeh, the trans woman who makes good use of the fantasy setting to have a biological child. I loved the Godmade, whos androgynous presence inspires everyone around them to use neutral pronouns. It was great. I was interested. I was glad that these characters appeared to be more respectful renditions of trans characters compared to the sorry excuse for 'trans men' in The Tempering of Men.
However, the supposed trans man in this story doesn't sit right with me, if he is even intended to be read as trans. But I don't know what else to do with the information that this big magical creature of a man, by his own words, 'used to be a woman'. If the explanation ended there, I would have accepted it. But apparently the only reason this character chose to become a big hulking man-creature was to... defeat a wizard? And there's no discussion of gender at any point, or if this character even identifies as male? It felt messy, and weird, and disrespectful considering the explicitly trans explanation given about Sayeh. A shame and a disappointment considering this character is one of the most interesting parts of the whole book. It feels like a missed opportunity. It feels wrong. It feels like Elizabeth Bear has never spoken to a trans person in her life.
In general I wish this book had focused more on The Dead Man and the Gage, as their chapters were the most engaging to read. The chapters following both Rajni were interesting at first, but severely bogged down the story as it progressed. There are some very interesting ideas at play here, but the execution completely fell apart for reasons I don't understand.
And I have to talk about the trans characters. At first, I was all about it. I loved Sayeh, the trans woman who makes good use of the fantasy setting to have a biological child. I loved the Godmade, whos androgynous presence inspires everyone around them to use neutral pronouns. It was great. I was interested. I was glad that these characters appeared to be more respectful renditions of trans characters compared to the sorry excuse for 'trans men' in The Tempering of Men.
However, the supposed trans man in this story doesn't sit right with me, if he is even intended to be read as trans. But I don't know what else to do with the information that this big magical creature of a man, by his own words, 'used to be a woman'. If the explanation ended there, I would have accepted it. But apparently the only reason this character chose to become a big hulking man-creature was to... defeat a wizard? And there's no discussion of gender at any point, or if this character even identifies as male? It felt messy, and weird, and disrespectful considering the explicitly trans explanation given about Sayeh. A shame and a disappointment considering this character is one of the most interesting parts of the whole book. It feels like a missed opportunity. It feels wrong. It feels like Elizabeth Bear has never spoken to a trans person in her life.
In general I wish this book had focused more on The Dead Man and the Gage, as their chapters were the most engaging to read. The chapters following both Rajni were interesting at first, but severely bogged down the story as it progressed. There are some very interesting ideas at play here, but the execution completely fell apart for reasons I don't understand.
[07/28/2021]
the gods of tango ★★★★★ by carolina de robertis - Adult Historical Fiction with a Transmasc MC
the gods of tango ★★★★★ by carolina de robertis - Adult Historical Fiction with a Transmasc MC
content warning(s):
incest, offscreen csa, offscreen sexual assault, suicide, suicidal thoughts, outing
In Buenos Aires in 1913, 17 year old Leda arrives alone to marry her cousin, only to find out that he's been killed. Alone on the brink of destitution, with no friends or family, and only her cherished violin to give her joy, Leda finds herself seduced by the Tango and disguises herself as a young man to join a troupe of musicians.
First off, for a while I felt unsure labeling Dante/Leda as a trans man, only because it felt too good to be true. This book is too beautiful. Too well-crafted. Too well-intentioned. There's a lot of overlap in Dante's life with butch lesbian experiences, and the author herself is married to a woman. However, I related heavily to Dante's experiences navigating gender, navigating his sexuality, navigating himself. And the final nail on the coffin was reading Billy Tipton's name in the acknowledgements, a jazz musician who lived as a stealth trans man until the day he died. So I will be recommending this book as one with a trans male protagonist, and it is an incredible piece of work for that.
The Gods of Tango is a wild ride. At times heartbreaking, exhilarating, rejuvenating, and at the end of it all, almost unbelievably so, incredibly hopeful. De Robertis crafts a story that gives a voice to those of us lost to history, rewritten, erased. It makes a place for us and fills it with so much music and love and life that I couldn't believe my eyes. When I finished it I sobbed like I haven't in half a decade. This is a respectful work of fiction that navigates the complexities of gender in a way that feels realistic to the time period while still striking true to experiences that are lived to this day.
And while it isn't a quick read, with some paragraphs stretching across several pages, it's a highly enjoyable one. I soaked up every word. I have never touched a violin in my life, but at times I felt like I was right there in Dante's shoes, under the stage lights, bow raised, alive with a desire to live my own life. No matter how difficult it is.
First off, for a while I felt unsure labeling Dante/Leda as a trans man, only because it felt too good to be true. This book is too beautiful. Too well-crafted. Too well-intentioned. There's a lot of overlap in Dante's life with butch lesbian experiences, and the author herself is married to a woman. However, I related heavily to Dante's experiences navigating gender, navigating his sexuality, navigating himself. And the final nail on the coffin was reading Billy Tipton's name in the acknowledgements, a jazz musician who lived as a stealth trans man until the day he died. So I will be recommending this book as one with a trans male protagonist, and it is an incredible piece of work for that.
The Gods of Tango is a wild ride. At times heartbreaking, exhilarating, rejuvenating, and at the end of it all, almost unbelievably so, incredibly hopeful. De Robertis crafts a story that gives a voice to those of us lost to history, rewritten, erased. It makes a place for us and fills it with so much music and love and life that I couldn't believe my eyes. When I finished it I sobbed like I haven't in half a decade. This is a respectful work of fiction that navigates the complexities of gender in a way that feels realistic to the time period while still striking true to experiences that are lived to this day.
And while it isn't a quick read, with some paragraphs stretching across several pages, it's a highly enjoyable one. I soaked up every word. I have never touched a violin in my life, but at times I felt like I was right there in Dante's shoes, under the stage lights, bow raised, alive with a desire to live my own life. No matter how difficult it is.
[07/15/2021]
body after body ★★★★☆ by briar ripley page - Erotic Adult Scifi with Transmasc and Transfem MCs.
body after body ★★★★☆ by briar ripley page - Erotic Adult Scifi with Transmasc and Transfem MCs.
content warning(s):
gore, body horror, misgendering, drug and alcohol use
Three indentured, memory-wiped laborers at a crumbling storage facility make some unexpected discoveries about the genetically engineered mutant bodies they tend each day.
Body after Body is weird, dreamlike, and grotesque - all in the best ways possible. It's also my favorite trans work I've come across to date. The trans characters are varied, unique, flawed, and entirely lovable. This is an interesting poetic novella that churns my stomach at the same time as it exposes delicate feelings about gender and transition. Each of the characters is a star, I had a hard time picking my favorite out of the bunch. But one thing I know for sure is that this is a game changer. This is exactly the kind of weirdness I'd dying to see in future stories about trans characters.
Body after Body is available for pay what you can on the author's gumroad.
Body after Body is weird, dreamlike, and grotesque - all in the best ways possible. It's also my favorite trans work I've come across to date. The trans characters are varied, unique, flawed, and entirely lovable. This is an interesting poetic novella that churns my stomach at the same time as it exposes delicate feelings about gender and transition. Each of the characters is a star, I had a hard time picking my favorite out of the bunch. But one thing I know for sure is that this is a game changer. This is exactly the kind of weirdness I'd dying to see in future stories about trans characters.
Body after Body is available for pay what you can on the author's gumroad.
[05/22/2021]
the luminous dead ★★★☆☆ by cailtlin starling - F/F Scifi Thriller
the luminous dead ★★★☆☆ by cailtlin starling - F/F Scifi Thriller
content warning(s):
unreality, paranoia, deception/lying, gaslighting, death, loss of bodily autonomy, themes of abandonment
Gyre Price has just lied her way into a mining expedition well above her experience level - lured by the promise of a fat paycheck and the assumption she could rely on a skilled surface team to keep her safe. Instead, she gets Em - controlling, cold, and ruthless in her handling of Gyre. To make matters worse, the deeper Gyre descends, the more she can't shake the feeling that she's being followed.
I'm always going to leap at the chance to read more gay horror/thrillers, and I really enjoyed my time with this one. The cave and all its mysteries is easily the best part about this book. It kept me wondering until the very last page about what would happen next and what was really going on. The constant back-and-forths between the character's opinions of each other started to grate on me after a while, but not enough to dampen my overall enjoyment. And I do so enjoy seeing gay people navigate difficult, messy, or even unhealthy relationships.
This is a solid survival story with as many twists and turns as the cave itself, that at times dips much darker than I expected it to. A totally immersive experience that made me feel I was right there with Gyre the entire time.
I'm always going to leap at the chance to read more gay horror/thrillers, and I really enjoyed my time with this one. The cave and all its mysteries is easily the best part about this book. It kept me wondering until the very last page about what would happen next and what was really going on. The constant back-and-forths between the character's opinions of each other started to grate on me after a while, but not enough to dampen my overall enjoyment. And I do so enjoy seeing gay people navigate difficult, messy, or even unhealthy relationships.
This is a solid survival story with as many twists and turns as the cave itself, that at times dips much darker than I expected it to. A totally immersive experience that made me feel I was right there with Gyre the entire time.
[05/02/2021]
on the enemy's side ★★★☆☆ by hamour baika - M/M Historical Fiction
on the enemy's side ★★★☆☆ by hamour baika - M/M Historical Fiction
content warning(s):
Romantic relationship between an adult and a 17 year old, ethnic/religious/political violence, homophobia, power imbalance
In 1980 Hesam drops out of medical school in Rome to serve his country in Iran. He becomes a prison guard in Ahwaz assigned to investigate and interrogate political prisoners. As he learns more about ongoing ethnic and religious tensions, he forms a close bond with one young prisoner, and has to make a difficult choice in a country where same-sex love is violently condemned.
This is a difficult book to review. And it's especially hard to recommend this as a romance when I don't support the age difference or the power imbalance between the two main characters. I don't much like Hesam at all, really. But Bahram, on the other hand is the star of the show. He's smart, he's brave, he knows what he wants and I want the very best for him. I loved reading about his experiences growing up gay in Iran, and I think that despite this book's flaws, he is what makes this book so important. We see this story about men that we so rarely get to know about, framed in a carefully crafted context by an author who grew up in Iran himself.
And there's more to this book than just the romance. There's politics, sure, but there's also a whole cast of interesting characters that try to do their best in difficult and dangerous situations. It's a gripping story from start to finish - one that I found hard to put down. I especially loved the ending. So even though I have my issues with the age difference and the romance, I still think this is an important addition to gay fiction, from an author I genuinely want to see more from.
This is a difficult book to review. And it's especially hard to recommend this as a romance when I don't support the age difference or the power imbalance between the two main characters. I don't much like Hesam at all, really. But Bahram, on the other hand is the star of the show. He's smart, he's brave, he knows what he wants and I want the very best for him. I loved reading about his experiences growing up gay in Iran, and I think that despite this book's flaws, he is what makes this book so important. We see this story about men that we so rarely get to know about, framed in a carefully crafted context by an author who grew up in Iran himself.
And there's more to this book than just the romance. There's politics, sure, but there's also a whole cast of interesting characters that try to do their best in difficult and dangerous situations. It's a gripping story from start to finish - one that I found hard to put down. I especially loved the ending. So even though I have my issues with the age difference and the romance, I still think this is an important addition to gay fiction, from an author I genuinely want to see more from.
[04/20/2021]
everyone on the moon is essential personnel ★★★★☆ by julian k. jarboe - Short Story Collection with Trans Characters
everyone on the moon is essential personnel ★★★★☆ by julian k. jarboe - Short Story Collection with Trans Characters
content warning(s):
Misgendering, Implied Self Harm
A collection of body-horror fairy tales and mid-apocalyptic Catholic cyberpunk stories about bodily autonomy and transformation, the importance of negative emotions, unhealthy relationships, and bad situations amidst the staggering and urgent question of how to build and nurture meaning, love, and safety in a larger world/society that might not be "fixable."
This collection was more than I expected. Admittedly I'm not usually drawn to short story collections, I find them difficult to enjoy due to their abruptness and disjointed narratives. But there's not a single story here that I didn't like for some reason or other. Despite how much they vary in topic and tone, I found something to like about all of them, and I'm having a hard time picking a favorite out of the bunch. Self Care, Estranged Children of Storybook Houses, and I Am A Beautiful Bug! stood out to me the most, but each story was its own whirlwind of emotion and ideas, to the point where I feel like I can't correctly put into words why I enjoyed this collection so much. It's weird and difficult and beautiful. It's an experience - at once painful, cathartic, freeing, and discomfiting. But a joy nonetheless. I'm very interested in keeping an eye on this author's future works.
This collection was more than I expected. Admittedly I'm not usually drawn to short story collections, I find them difficult to enjoy due to their abruptness and disjointed narratives. But there's not a single story here that I didn't like for some reason or other. Despite how much they vary in topic and tone, I found something to like about all of them, and I'm having a hard time picking a favorite out of the bunch. Self Care, Estranged Children of Storybook Houses, and I Am A Beautiful Bug! stood out to me the most, but each story was its own whirlwind of emotion and ideas, to the point where I feel like I can't correctly put into words why I enjoyed this collection so much. It's weird and difficult and beautiful. It's an experience - at once painful, cathartic, freeing, and discomfiting. But a joy nonetheless. I'm very interested in keeping an eye on this author's future works.
[03/27/2021]
the prey of gods ★★☆☆☆ by nicky drayden - Adult Scifi with M/M and a Transwoman MC
the prey of gods ★★☆☆☆ by nicky drayden - Adult Scifi with M/M and a Transwoman MC
content warning(s):
Circumcision, Rape, Gore, Self Harm, Misgendering, Implied Sexual Abuse of a Child, Child Abuse/Neglect, Death, Drugs, Violence
In South Africa, a new hallucinogenic drug is sweeping the streets. At the same time, the makings of AI uprising start to gain traction, and an ancient demigodess hellbent on regaining her former glory makes plans to shake things up.
I liked this book at first. It was weird, in a way that I like things to be weird. I liked the varitey of characters and their intertwining paths. I liked the story and the setting. But in the second half, weirdness turned to absurdity and I found myself slowly losing interest and immersion in whatever the hell was going on. I don't want to say this was a bad book, because I still enjoyed it overall, I just think it didn't align with my tastes very well at the end. The characters were still a joy, and I have to say I'm happy to see gay and trans characters existing in these kinds of strange and interesting stories.
I liked this book at first. It was weird, in a way that I like things to be weird. I liked the varitey of characters and their intertwining paths. I liked the story and the setting. But in the second half, weirdness turned to absurdity and I found myself slowly losing interest and immersion in whatever the hell was going on. I don't want to say this was a bad book, because I still enjoyed it overall, I just think it didn't align with my tastes very well at the end. The characters were still a joy, and I have to say I'm happy to see gay and trans characters existing in these kinds of strange and interesting stories.
a land fit for heroes by richard k. morgan - Mature Dark Fantasy with Gay and Lesbian MCs
Ringil Eskiath, enlisted by his estranged mother to find his missing cousin, embarks on a grumbling journey to track her down with only the sword on his back. At the same time, the gears of a bloody prophecy jolt into motion.
Ringil Eskiath, enlisted by his estranged mother to find his missing cousin, embarks on a grumbling journey to track her down with only the sword on his back. At the same time, the gears of a bloody prophecy jolt into motion.
content warning(s):
r*pe, csa and pedophilia, homophobia, gratuitous use of the f-slur
[12/30/2020]
the steel remains ★★★★☆
I'll begin with the negatives - of which there are few. I found all of the sex with all of the characters to be very unsexy. I don't mind lots of sex in fiction, but the scenes themselves failed to pull my interest. However, the leadup to the most important sex scene was pretty hot, so at least there's that. I also felt like some parts of the story and worldbuilding were glossed over even when they seemed important, and lesser relevant parts had a little too much focus in comparison. Maybe there will be more expansion on these details in the rest of the series - especially when it comes to the Kiriath and the other minor inhuman creatures that apparently exist in this world, but I was really left wanting to know more.
Now for the positives. I loved these troubled characters. I loved Ringil's unapologetic faggotry, his anger, his weariness. I loved Archidi's entire concept and especially her knives. Egar...was okay. I would have liked him a lot more if he wasn't attracted to teenage girls.
And I really liked the story here. As Black Sails proved, if you're going to include homophobia or racism or sexism in a fictional setting, at least have the decency to give the characters the means to do something about it. Or at the very least, let them be angry about it, and let them try. And try, they do. For that reason, I enjoyed this book a lot more than I thought I would. And I want to see where the rest of this series goes.
the steel remains ★★★★☆
I'll begin with the negatives - of which there are few. I found all of the sex with all of the characters to be very unsexy. I don't mind lots of sex in fiction, but the scenes themselves failed to pull my interest. However, the leadup to the most important sex scene was pretty hot, so at least there's that. I also felt like some parts of the story and worldbuilding were glossed over even when they seemed important, and lesser relevant parts had a little too much focus in comparison. Maybe there will be more expansion on these details in the rest of the series - especially when it comes to the Kiriath and the other minor inhuman creatures that apparently exist in this world, but I was really left wanting to know more.
Now for the positives. I loved these troubled characters. I loved Ringil's unapologetic faggotry, his anger, his weariness. I loved Archidi's entire concept and especially her knives. Egar...was okay. I would have liked him a lot more if he wasn't attracted to teenage girls.
And I really liked the story here. As Black Sails proved, if you're going to include homophobia or racism or sexism in a fictional setting, at least have the decency to give the characters the means to do something about it. Or at the very least, let them be angry about it, and let them try. And try, they do. For that reason, I enjoyed this book a lot more than I thought I would. And I want to see where the rest of this series goes.
[01/14/2020]
the cold commands ★★★☆☆
This one was a bit of a slower read. Luckily, Ringil is hotter than ever, the level of violence doesn't hold back, and even the sex scenes seem to have improved. I did find myself confused at times - especially in regards to Hjel - wondering if I had missed something in the previous book and even had to pause and flip through the steel remains to double check. Which is my biggest bone to pick, because the last thing I want to do when reading is to feel like I've completely missed out on a major point. But I still enjoyed it and I'm looking forward to seeing how this all rounds up in the last book.
[02/01/2020]
the dark defiles ★☆☆☆☆
I put off writing this review for a few days because I wanted to put this book entirely out of my mind and be done with it for good. To say I am disappointed would be the understatement of the century. Even after gathering my thoughts and letting my battered braincells recharge, I have no idea what the hell this book was supposed to accomplish besides slow psychological torture. It took me over twenty hours to get through this garbage. Twenty hours I will never get back. But I endured, out of misguided disbelief, that this couldn't possibly be as bad as I thought it was. But it only got worse, until I got to the ending and had to be slapped in the face for one final time.
Egar has no redeeming qualities. I didn't like him from the start, and he never improved. What pissed me off the most is that I could take it the first couple of times he called Ringil the f-slur. I could almost call it endearing. But it finally became clear to me that he says it more often than he says Ringil's name and that was the last straw for me. I started skipping his POVs, because he literally has nothing of substance to add to the story, and I had no faith in any kind of character progression.
But Egar was only one reason why the POV split model really fell apart in this book. While Ringil was off playing with dark magic and doing other Ringil things, Achidi, Egar, and their new cast of pointless companions were off dragging their feet in their own useless adventure, prolonging conversations over multiple chapters that took away any sense of pacing and structure going on in the main storyline.
One of the most egregious offenses was one particular offhanded comment tucked into one of the most boring handful of pages that stated Ringil had slept with a previously never-mentioned woman character that had no role or purpose. Ringil - gay faggot extraordinaire - slept with a woman and apparently had no problem with it. It's stupid. Why does anything matter at this point? Oh wait, it doesn't. Not only that - near the very end, there's a scene where Archidi gazes up at an empty sky and literally "gives up trying to understand" what had happened to her. And I think that sums up entirely my feelings while reading this entire book. Its confusing, pointless, vapid, and insulting.
As if all that wasn't enough, a lot of it reads like pages straight out of Morgan's worldbuilding notes, not something you want to read in a novel, much less the conclusion of a trilogy. And the ending itself was the most limp, stale shit I have ever laid eyes upon. There were a few good moments, bright scraps amidst a looming pile of filth, but none of it is enough to redeem this book or make it worthwhile. My only joy came from finally being free from this torture ride.
[12/23/2020]
ancestral night ★★★☆☆ by elizabeth bear - Space Scifi with a Lesbian MC
Haimey and her crew of deepspace salvagers come across a terrible crime in the dark recesses of the galaxy and with it uncover a powerful and alien technology.
One way or another, I always end up crawling back to Elizabeth Bear. Out of curiosity or masochism or faith, I just can't quit her. And when I saw that Bear had come out with an LGBT space opera, I was excited, but I knew I also had to be cautious due to Bear's treatment of gay characters in her previous works (Hello Edda of Burdens and Companion to Wolves). But, and I can't believe I'm about to say this, after getting through this entire 500 page brick of a book, I genuinely have no content warnings to bring to the table. In fact, to my surprise and hesitant joy, with Ancestral Night Bear states in no vague terms that consent is essential. And with that, we get a main character who not only understands this, but asserts it too. And, surprise surprise, we still get a complex character who carries trauma, and issues and uncertainties. But not at the behest of sexual abuse. And I am beyond happy to be able to say that.
Now, about the plot. I liked it. I liked the characters and the weird spacetime stuff, and Bear's descriptions of strange and wonderful spacescapes. I liked the scraps of gender nonconformity, the alien creatures, and all of the cool technology from the most basic level to the more extreme alien concepts. But it was a slow read, and strangely repetitive at some parts. So for that I can't give it more than three stars, maybe a 3.5 on a good day, but I did like this book. And I am very interested in reading the sequel, and keeping an eye on Bear's future works too.
ancestral night ★★★☆☆ by elizabeth bear - Space Scifi with a Lesbian MC
Haimey and her crew of deepspace salvagers come across a terrible crime in the dark recesses of the galaxy and with it uncover a powerful and alien technology.
One way or another, I always end up crawling back to Elizabeth Bear. Out of curiosity or masochism or faith, I just can't quit her. And when I saw that Bear had come out with an LGBT space opera, I was excited, but I knew I also had to be cautious due to Bear's treatment of gay characters in her previous works (Hello Edda of Burdens and Companion to Wolves). But, and I can't believe I'm about to say this, after getting through this entire 500 page brick of a book, I genuinely have no content warnings to bring to the table. In fact, to my surprise and hesitant joy, with Ancestral Night Bear states in no vague terms that consent is essential. And with that, we get a main character who not only understands this, but asserts it too. And, surprise surprise, we still get a complex character who carries trauma, and issues and uncertainties. But not at the behest of sexual abuse. And I am beyond happy to be able to say that.
Now, about the plot. I liked it. I liked the characters and the weird spacetime stuff, and Bear's descriptions of strange and wonderful spacescapes. I liked the scraps of gender nonconformity, the alien creatures, and all of the cool technology from the most basic level to the more extreme alien concepts. But it was a slow read, and strangely repetitive at some parts. So for that I can't give it more than three stars, maybe a 3.5 on a good day, but I did like this book. And I am very interested in reading the sequel, and keeping an eye on Bear's future works too.
[12/02/2020]
the disasters ★☆☆☆☆ by m. k. england - YA Scifi w/ casual LGBT diversity
A group of four teenagers get rejected from the Space Academy and find themselves suddenly on a high-stakes adventure as a crew on a stolen spaceship.
As someone who doesn't personally like YA, I can still see the value in it and don't necessarily equate YA = bad. I've read good YA, I know it exists, and I know the disasters does not fall into that category. The biggest issue I had while reading this book was unfortunately with the characters; Boasting a diverse cast in both the race and sexual identity categories (including but not limited to a Russian trans girl from Kazakhstan), you would think that this quirky cast of teens would be interesting and full of depth. But this whole book is about as deep as a kiddie pool and the characters are no less shallow for it. I can't tell you anything about Rion's personality besides...British. And red hair. And what's that? Those aren't personality traits, you say? Well that's exactly my issue. I have to say that the most life-like character in the entire cast was Asra, and even then her reasons for joining in with the main cast were ridiculously unbelievable.
Diversity means nothing if the characters themselves have zero personality..outside of those diversity markers. But besides that, there was also a lot of awfully quirky dialogue that didn't contrast well with the whole threat of impending doom present from the start. Which, sure, the characters are all teenagers, but they really felt more like 14/15 year olds instead of the 17-19 range that they are. And don't even get me started on how uncomfortable it was when the gay black guy joked about dancing sexily on a table as 'distraction'.
Besides the characters, there were also a few continuity issues that really tied this whole book together as extremely fitting for its title, and I'm walking away from this with no intention of reading YA ever again.
the disasters ★☆☆☆☆ by m. k. england - YA Scifi w/ casual LGBT diversity
A group of four teenagers get rejected from the Space Academy and find themselves suddenly on a high-stakes adventure as a crew on a stolen spaceship.
As someone who doesn't personally like YA, I can still see the value in it and don't necessarily equate YA = bad. I've read good YA, I know it exists, and I know the disasters does not fall into that category. The biggest issue I had while reading this book was unfortunately with the characters; Boasting a diverse cast in both the race and sexual identity categories (including but not limited to a Russian trans girl from Kazakhstan), you would think that this quirky cast of teens would be interesting and full of depth. But this whole book is about as deep as a kiddie pool and the characters are no less shallow for it. I can't tell you anything about Rion's personality besides...British. And red hair. And what's that? Those aren't personality traits, you say? Well that's exactly my issue. I have to say that the most life-like character in the entire cast was Asra, and even then her reasons for joining in with the main cast were ridiculously unbelievable.
Diversity means nothing if the characters themselves have zero personality..outside of those diversity markers. But besides that, there was also a lot of awfully quirky dialogue that didn't contrast well with the whole threat of impending doom present from the start. Which, sure, the characters are all teenagers, but they really felt more like 14/15 year olds instead of the 17-19 range that they are. And don't even get me started on how uncomfortable it was when the gay black guy joked about dancing sexily on a table as 'distraction'.
Besides the characters, there were also a few continuity issues that really tied this whole book together as extremely fitting for its title, and I'm walking away from this with no intention of reading YA ever again.
[11/17/2020]
scorpion ★★☆☆☆ by voinov aleksandr - M/M Erotic Dark Fantasy
scorpion ★★☆☆☆ by voinov aleksandr - M/M Erotic Dark Fantasy
content warning(s):
r*pe, possible csa?, dubcon
Kendras is a casualty of war. Abandoned by his King and very nearly dead himself, Kendras, at the end of his rope, gets a strange offer from a strange man who says he wants to help him.
I liked this book at first. I liked the characters, the brisk writing style, and I've always had a soft spot for sword-weilding outcasts. But once the plot moved away from murder plots to royal politics and frequent sex with an emotionless man that I did not care for at all, the writing style stopped doing the story any favors and my interest all but completely fell apart.
Which is unfortunate, because there were a few things that I did really like. Widow was the most interesting character by far - being a castrated assassin in love with essentially a warrior princess, I kind of wished the series was about him. Other than that, everything ended up being kind of a disappointment and I can't say I personally found the erotica enjoyable with how much of it was dubious consent, and I especially didn't like inclusion of very young men in sexual acts along with the avoidance of outright stating their ages. That felt especially skeevy.
There's a slim chance I might read the rest of the series for Widow alone.
I liked this book at first. I liked the characters, the brisk writing style, and I've always had a soft spot for sword-weilding outcasts. But once the plot moved away from murder plots to royal politics and frequent sex with an emotionless man that I did not care for at all, the writing style stopped doing the story any favors and my interest all but completely fell apart.
Which is unfortunate, because there were a few things that I did really like. Widow was the most interesting character by far - being a castrated assassin in love with essentially a warrior princess, I kind of wished the series was about him. Other than that, everything ended up being kind of a disappointment and I can't say I personally found the erotica enjoyable with how much of it was dubious consent, and I especially didn't like inclusion of very young men in sexual acts along with the avoidance of outright stating their ages. That felt especially skeevy.
There's a slim chance I might read the rest of the series for Widow alone.
doctrine of labyrinths by sarah monette - Fantasy Adventure with a Gay MC
Felix Harrowgate is a prestigious wizard of the glamorous Mirador. Mildmay is a lowly theif just making ends meet in the underbelly of the city. Their lives are about to take a sharp turn, where they will be thrown into an adventure neither of them are prepared to undertake.
Felix Harrowgate is a prestigious wizard of the glamorous Mirador. Mildmay is a lowly theif just making ends meet in the underbelly of the city. Their lives are about to take a sharp turn, where they will be thrown into an adventure neither of them are prepared to undertake.
content warning(s):
r*pe, csa, child prostitution, incestuous thoughts, suicidal ideation
[10/14/2020]
mélusine ★★★☆☆
I went into Mélusine expecting something much grimmer and darker. I don't know what it says about me that I've read much worse and found this to be tepid in comparison. To its credit, the worst scene in Mélusine happens in the beginning, and the rest of the book is a story about change and arduous growth. Of slow, painful, precarious healing. There is rage, there is conflict, there is grief. But in the middle of it all is a touching tale of compassion.
So, despite the harsh opening, I found myself enjoying this adventure quite a bit. The main characters were interesting, for the most part. The conflicts weren't shy or weak. And I'm always a fan of seeing characters go through hell, while struggling to stay true to themselves throughout it all. It was admittedly slow in the beginning, but after about the first 100 pages I was both invested and interested to the end.
I feel like I should have more complaints about this book, there's certainly enough fodder to work with, but maybe I'm getting jaded and terribly want to find enjoyment in things that aren't perfect. I'll stay cautious going into the rest of the series, but I do want to know what else lies in store for these characters, and that's good enough for me.
I have to mention, though, that there was a very strange and random section that flat out portrayed incestuous thoughts. Not sure what that means going forward, but it was very uncomfortable and I hope it doesn't make a resurgence in the following books.
mélusine ★★★☆☆
I went into Mélusine expecting something much grimmer and darker. I don't know what it says about me that I've read much worse and found this to be tepid in comparison. To its credit, the worst scene in Mélusine happens in the beginning, and the rest of the book is a story about change and arduous growth. Of slow, painful, precarious healing. There is rage, there is conflict, there is grief. But in the middle of it all is a touching tale of compassion.
So, despite the harsh opening, I found myself enjoying this adventure quite a bit. The main characters were interesting, for the most part. The conflicts weren't shy or weak. And I'm always a fan of seeing characters go through hell, while struggling to stay true to themselves throughout it all. It was admittedly slow in the beginning, but after about the first 100 pages I was both invested and interested to the end.
I feel like I should have more complaints about this book, there's certainly enough fodder to work with, but maybe I'm getting jaded and terribly want to find enjoyment in things that aren't perfect. I'll stay cautious going into the rest of the series, but I do want to know what else lies in store for these characters, and that's good enough for me.
I have to mention, though, that there was a very strange and random section that flat out portrayed incestuous thoughts. Not sure what that means going forward, but it was very uncomfortable and I hope it doesn't make a resurgence in the following books.
[10/21/2020]
the virtu ★★★☆☆
Why oh why do I still get my hopes up? Where I was hoping the incestuous thoughts in Mélusine would be a one time thing due to Felix's impaired state of mind, they come back ten times as strong in The Virtu and with no such excuse to brush it under the rug. And I almost wanted to believe it wasn't that bad, wanted to rationalize it through the fact that his brother was a stranger to him up until now, but that's exactly what Sarah Monette wants me to do, that's the exact same line of thinking that she uses to rationalize it, and that doesn't sit well with me at all. The only saving grace here is that Felix has enough sense to not act on this thoughts beyond a kiss, but I don't have any faith that it will stay that way.
Besides that, The Virtu was still a page-turner. I was rarely bored, and I've grown to like Mildmay a whole lot more than I did at first. He's become my favorite character, but I'm afraid my feelings for Felix have been dipping in the opposite direction. I do not like his attraction to his brother, nor did I enjoy the lukewarm attempt at giving him a different man to entertain his attention. I was rooting for Gideon in Mélusine, but seeing Felix's complete lack of feelings for him just was not interesting in the slightest.
Truly I have no idea what to expect going forward, but I don't have a good feeling about it.
the virtu ★★★☆☆
Why oh why do I still get my hopes up? Where I was hoping the incestuous thoughts in Mélusine would be a one time thing due to Felix's impaired state of mind, they come back ten times as strong in The Virtu and with no such excuse to brush it under the rug. And I almost wanted to believe it wasn't that bad, wanted to rationalize it through the fact that his brother was a stranger to him up until now, but that's exactly what Sarah Monette wants me to do, that's the exact same line of thinking that she uses to rationalize it, and that doesn't sit well with me at all. The only saving grace here is that Felix has enough sense to not act on this thoughts beyond a kiss, but I don't have any faith that it will stay that way.
Besides that, The Virtu was still a page-turner. I was rarely bored, and I've grown to like Mildmay a whole lot more than I did at first. He's become my favorite character, but I'm afraid my feelings for Felix have been dipping in the opposite direction. I do not like his attraction to his brother, nor did I enjoy the lukewarm attempt at giving him a different man to entertain his attention. I was rooting for Gideon in Mélusine, but seeing Felix's complete lack of feelings for him just was not interesting in the slightest.
Truly I have no idea what to expect going forward, but I don't have a good feeling about it.
[10/28/2020]
the mirador ★★☆☆☆
I did not like the addition of Mehitabel's POV and here's why: I have spent the past two books reading a fantasy story about magic and adventure and the tumultuous relationship between Felix and Mildmay and that is what I am invested in. Mehitable's POV straight up feels like a victorian-era romance/drama and I do not care for it. Her scenes inside the Mirador were fine enough, because at least then I was reading about stuff that seemed to matter. But I didn't enjoy reading about her theater life at all. It felt pointless and entirely out of place. Her character itself is fine for the most part, but her POV could not keep my interest.
But Mehitabel wasn't the only boring part of The Mirador. I don't know what happened, but it felt like nothing was happening for 60% of this book. I don't understand how I just read 400 pages when I feel like I just ate a piece of toast where only one corner was covered by a single slice of avocado. But I really liked the ending, so even though The Mirador was a bit of a flop (Mildmay is still a shining star despite everything), I need to know how this story ends for once and for all.
the mirador ★★☆☆☆
I did not like the addition of Mehitabel's POV and here's why: I have spent the past two books reading a fantasy story about magic and adventure and the tumultuous relationship between Felix and Mildmay and that is what I am invested in. Mehitable's POV straight up feels like a victorian-era romance/drama and I do not care for it. Her scenes inside the Mirador were fine enough, because at least then I was reading about stuff that seemed to matter. But I didn't enjoy reading about her theater life at all. It felt pointless and entirely out of place. Her character itself is fine for the most part, but her POV could not keep my interest.
But Mehitabel wasn't the only boring part of The Mirador. I don't know what happened, but it felt like nothing was happening for 60% of this book. I don't understand how I just read 400 pages when I feel like I just ate a piece of toast where only one corner was covered by a single slice of avocado. But I really liked the ending, so even though The Mirador was a bit of a flop (Mildmay is still a shining star despite everything), I need to know how this story ends for once and for all.
[11/01/2020]
corambis ★★★★☆
Ah, closure. The sweet taste of satisfaction. I loved this book. From start to finish, I loved the setting, the adventure, the plot, the magic, the new characters, and most of all I loved the development between Mildmay and Felix. And once again I have fallen in love with Felix, after having felt very conflicted about him over the past two books. My biggest issue being Felix's attraction to this brother, but it finally gets shut down for good in this book, to my immense relief.
But not only did I enjoy Felix and Mildmay immensely, I also liked Kay as the third POV in this book. Truthfully, most of that can be attributed to the fact that he's gay too, but I did enjoy his scenes and overall role as well. Very much. And on that note, I have to say that I liked the variety of gay characters that exist in this series in general. Even Felix, with all his flaws, is a good character. And it's going to be sad to put him (and Mildmay) down after everything we've been through, but I couldn't have asked for a better ending. I can be wistful about wanting to have seen a better romance for Felix, but I understand why that wasn't in the cards for him, and most importantly, I feel hopeful for his future.
And that's maybe the biggest reason why I loved this book so much. I think stories can be vile and messy and unvirtuous, but what matters most to me is the message that comes along with the filth. And with Corambis, Sarah Monette has wrapped up this whole series with a message of hope, of change, of love. For that, I'm very glad to have stuck through to the end.
corambis ★★★★☆
Ah, closure. The sweet taste of satisfaction. I loved this book. From start to finish, I loved the setting, the adventure, the plot, the magic, the new characters, and most of all I loved the development between Mildmay and Felix. And once again I have fallen in love with Felix, after having felt very conflicted about him over the past two books. My biggest issue being Felix's attraction to this brother, but it finally gets shut down for good in this book, to my immense relief.
But not only did I enjoy Felix and Mildmay immensely, I also liked Kay as the third POV in this book. Truthfully, most of that can be attributed to the fact that he's gay too, but I did enjoy his scenes and overall role as well. Very much. And on that note, I have to say that I liked the variety of gay characters that exist in this series in general. Even Felix, with all his flaws, is a good character. And it's going to be sad to put him (and Mildmay) down after everything we've been through, but I couldn't have asked for a better ending. I can be wistful about wanting to have seen a better romance for Felix, but I understand why that wasn't in the cards for him, and most importantly, I feel hopeful for his future.
And that's maybe the biggest reason why I loved this book so much. I think stories can be vile and messy and unvirtuous, but what matters most to me is the message that comes along with the filth. And with Corambis, Sarah Monette has wrapped up this whole series with a message of hope, of change, of love. For that, I'm very glad to have stuck through to the end.
[9/27/2020]
comfort & joy ★★★★★ by jim grimsley - M/M Romance
Ford McKinney is a doctor - young, rich, and handsome. Dan Crell is an administrator at the hospital who has the voice of an angel and a family that Ford's parents would never approve of. That is, if he could ever actually bring himself to tell them that he's gay.
It's been a long time since I read a book that I couldn't put down. I went so far as to reach for this book as soon as I woke up instead of scrolling through my phone. I read while I ate, and fought off sleep to read just one more page. I was extremely wary of Grimsley after reading Kirith Kirin earlier this year, but if I ignore the colossal failure of the romance in Kirith Kirin, I have to say that Grimsley is a technically good writer. So I felt tempted to give him another chance, and I'm so glad I did.
It's rare to come across a romance that goes beyond the spark of when two people first collide, that stretches into the following years and shows in plain light the choices and the decisions that come long after the first date. Comfort & Joy accomplished this incredibly well. The magnetism present when these two men first begin is palpable, and continues to pulse from the pages until the very end. I was worried, with a title like that, that this story would be too sweet for my tastes. Too perfect and rose-colored. Once again, I was pleasantly surprised. Ford and Dan frequently have to make the decision to continue to try to be together, through hardships both internal and external. And through it all, I felt a constant comforting pressure, wrapped around me, ensuring me that everything would be alright, no matter what.
I also appreciated the handling of chronic illness in this story. As someone who has struggled with my health for as long as I can remember, the fear of being a burden and the consequent fear of intimacy is real, and I saw that facet of myself reflected in Dan. It felt real, and I appreciated it for that, so so much. All in all, this book feels like a soothing balm. A kiss on the forehead, and a squeeze to the hand. A reassurance, and a reminder to always try to live the life that you know is right for you.
comfort & joy ★★★★★ by jim grimsley - M/M Romance
Ford McKinney is a doctor - young, rich, and handsome. Dan Crell is an administrator at the hospital who has the voice of an angel and a family that Ford's parents would never approve of. That is, if he could ever actually bring himself to tell them that he's gay.
It's been a long time since I read a book that I couldn't put down. I went so far as to reach for this book as soon as I woke up instead of scrolling through my phone. I read while I ate, and fought off sleep to read just one more page. I was extremely wary of Grimsley after reading Kirith Kirin earlier this year, but if I ignore the colossal failure of the romance in Kirith Kirin, I have to say that Grimsley is a technically good writer. So I felt tempted to give him another chance, and I'm so glad I did.
It's rare to come across a romance that goes beyond the spark of when two people first collide, that stretches into the following years and shows in plain light the choices and the decisions that come long after the first date. Comfort & Joy accomplished this incredibly well. The magnetism present when these two men first begin is palpable, and continues to pulse from the pages until the very end. I was worried, with a title like that, that this story would be too sweet for my tastes. Too perfect and rose-colored. Once again, I was pleasantly surprised. Ford and Dan frequently have to make the decision to continue to try to be together, through hardships both internal and external. And through it all, I felt a constant comforting pressure, wrapped around me, ensuring me that everything would be alright, no matter what.
I also appreciated the handling of chronic illness in this story. As someone who has struggled with my health for as long as I can remember, the fear of being a burden and the consequent fear of intimacy is real, and I saw that facet of myself reflected in Dan. It felt real, and I appreciated it for that, so so much. All in all, this book feels like a soothing balm. A kiss on the forehead, and a squeeze to the hand. A reassurance, and a reminder to always try to live the life that you know is right for you.
[9/18/2020]
echoes ★★☆☆☆ by l.a. ashton - M/M Modern Vampire Romance
echoes ★★☆☆☆ by l.a. ashton - M/M Modern Vampire Romance
Two vampires meet after a thousand years of being apart, in rural America, just as conflict arises with the local werewolf pack. Cue awkward token diversity, and a plot that doesn't get interesting until the final quarter.
I am not immune to the charm of vampires, so I picked this up with semi-high hopes. A romance that's between two vampires instead of a vampire and a human? You had my interest from that alone. But the writing style did not mesh with me, I don't like formulaic romance novels with derivative plots and weak prose, and had I known echoes was going to be one of those, I would have skipped it.
Other than disliking the prose itself, I thought the effort to have diverse main characters felt awkward and barely surface-level, as if the author spent an hour on wikipedia reading about native americans and vikings and thought that was more than enough. And maybe for a novel with as little depth as this, it is enough? But it just felt weird to me, and it resulted in some uncomfortable dialogue from time to time. Even though I thought the concepts for both main characters was cool, the execution is limp at best and insulting at worst.
Besides that, the plot did grip my attention during the final quarter, and I ended up blowing through those pages with ease whereas I was struggling to keep my eyes open up until then. So, it's not abysmal. I'm aware that books like these are not my cup of tea, but objectively speaking it wasn't a terrible read and probably about as good as you can expect with modern romance as it stands.
I am not immune to the charm of vampires, so I picked this up with semi-high hopes. A romance that's between two vampires instead of a vampire and a human? You had my interest from that alone. But the writing style did not mesh with me, I don't like formulaic romance novels with derivative plots and weak prose, and had I known echoes was going to be one of those, I would have skipped it.
Other than disliking the prose itself, I thought the effort to have diverse main characters felt awkward and barely surface-level, as if the author spent an hour on wikipedia reading about native americans and vikings and thought that was more than enough. And maybe for a novel with as little depth as this, it is enough? But it just felt weird to me, and it resulted in some uncomfortable dialogue from time to time. Even though I thought the concepts for both main characters was cool, the execution is limp at best and insulting at worst.
Besides that, the plot did grip my attention during the final quarter, and I ended up blowing through those pages with ease whereas I was struggling to keep my eyes open up until then. So, it's not abysmal. I'm aware that books like these are not my cup of tea, but objectively speaking it wasn't a terrible read and probably about as good as you can expect with modern romance as it stands.
[5/23/2020]
kirith kirin ★☆☆☆☆ by jim grimsley - M/M Fantasy "Romance"
kirith kirin ★☆☆☆☆ by jim grimsley - M/M Fantasy "Romance"
content warning(s):
p*dophilia, r*pe
Kirith Kirin starts out innocent enough: Jessex is a farm boy who gets whisked away from his family after a series of unfortunate events and embarks on a journey full of ancient forests, immortal beings, and magic. For the most part, this isn't a bad story, but I have a huge issue with the romance so let's get right into that.
From the start it's clear that Kirith Kirin will be an important person in Jessex's life. Knowing that this was a gay novel, one could assume that Kirith would eventually become Jessex's love interest. But Kirith, in all his beauty and grace, is thousands of years old. And our simple farmboy Jessex is 14. With the slow and drawn out pace of the story I thought surely the romance would blossom over the course of years and after Jessex grew up into an adult. There is even a point where Jessex is pursued by an older man in a very obvious way and everyone is horrified. Kirith Kirin himself punishes the man and sends him away to a place he can longer reach Jessex. This chain of events reinforced the belief that there would be no romance until Jessex reached adulthood.
Unfortunately I was wrong. And the worst part of it is that I was lead to believe it wouldn't happen by these previous events. Because of course - any man who pursues a 14 year old is the scum of the Earth. But at the ripe age of 15, apparently none of that matters anymore and Kirith essentially grooms Jessex into a romantic and sexual relationship, and marriage. He justifies this by claiming Jessex is wise and powerful beyond his years, but many times Jessex is referred to as a boy, even by Kirith Kirin himself. Jessex is often said to look, and feel, like a young boy. Both by Jessex himself, and by others. And looking back, its clear that Kirith had feelings for him even before Jessex gained this supposed wisdom and power, back when Jessex was 14. So that justification really did not work on me, and I struggled to get through the second half of this book. I dreaded any time Jessex and Kirith were alone together. I was made to feel like a crazy person for thinking their relationship wasn't right.
There were some parts of this story that I thought were cool. I liked the magic and the battles (when they weren't repetitive) and I even liked parts of the ending. But it was very slow at all times and I found it difficult to keep track of a lot of the names and history being thrown around.
Overall it left a sour taste in my mouth. The romance is so integral to the story and the actions Jessex takes that it's hard to ignore it for the sake of enjoying the rest of the story. I can't for the life of me understand the reasons for this age difference. Jessex never acts or feels like an adult. He is a child. And Kirith Kirin, a man who has been alive for thousands of years, should really have known better. What was intended to be a beautiful romance came off to me as Jessex being groomed into a tool for Kirith to use as he pleased. But Kirith is beautiful and kind and lonely, so that makes it all okay, right? Not to me. Not even for a second.
From the start it's clear that Kirith Kirin will be an important person in Jessex's life. Knowing that this was a gay novel, one could assume that Kirith would eventually become Jessex's love interest. But Kirith, in all his beauty and grace, is thousands of years old. And our simple farmboy Jessex is 14. With the slow and drawn out pace of the story I thought surely the romance would blossom over the course of years and after Jessex grew up into an adult. There is even a point where Jessex is pursued by an older man in a very obvious way and everyone is horrified. Kirith Kirin himself punishes the man and sends him away to a place he can longer reach Jessex. This chain of events reinforced the belief that there would be no romance until Jessex reached adulthood.
Unfortunately I was wrong. And the worst part of it is that I was lead to believe it wouldn't happen by these previous events. Because of course - any man who pursues a 14 year old is the scum of the Earth. But at the ripe age of 15, apparently none of that matters anymore and Kirith essentially grooms Jessex into a romantic and sexual relationship, and marriage. He justifies this by claiming Jessex is wise and powerful beyond his years, but many times Jessex is referred to as a boy, even by Kirith Kirin himself. Jessex is often said to look, and feel, like a young boy. Both by Jessex himself, and by others. And looking back, its clear that Kirith had feelings for him even before Jessex gained this supposed wisdom and power, back when Jessex was 14. So that justification really did not work on me, and I struggled to get through the second half of this book. I dreaded any time Jessex and Kirith were alone together. I was made to feel like a crazy person for thinking their relationship wasn't right.
There were some parts of this story that I thought were cool. I liked the magic and the battles (when they weren't repetitive) and I even liked parts of the ending. But it was very slow at all times and I found it difficult to keep track of a lot of the names and history being thrown around.
Overall it left a sour taste in my mouth. The romance is so integral to the story and the actions Jessex takes that it's hard to ignore it for the sake of enjoying the rest of the story. I can't for the life of me understand the reasons for this age difference. Jessex never acts or feels like an adult. He is a child. And Kirith Kirin, a man who has been alive for thousands of years, should really have known better. What was intended to be a beautiful romance came off to me as Jessex being groomed into a tool for Kirith to use as he pleased. But Kirith is beautiful and kind and lonely, so that makes it all okay, right? Not to me. Not even for a second.
[4/16/2020]
ninefox gambit ★★★★★ by yoon ha lee - Military Sci-fi w/ Lesbian MC, Casual Bisexuality and Casual Transgenderism / Transhumanism
ninefox gambit ★★★★★ by yoon ha lee - Military Sci-fi w/ Lesbian MC, Casual Bisexuality and Casual Transgenderism / Transhumanism
content warning(s):
r*pe, suicide, incest (book 2)
To win an impossible war, disgraced Captain Kel Cheris must awaken an ancient weapon, and redeem herself by retaking the Fortress of Scattered Needles - a star fortress that has recently been captured by heretics.
First off - Yoon Ha Lee is a trans man. Having never before read a book by a trans male author, I couldn't contain my excitement upon finding out about Ninefox Gambit. Which is exactly why I had to let it sit on my shelf for several months, so that I wouldn't dive into it headfirst with my expectations through the roof only to be dissapointed. But when I finally cracked it open, I learned very quickly that I needn't worry because this book is very cool, and there's a lot to unpack here, so let's go:
There is no romance in Ninefox Gambit, but Yoon Ha Lee was still kind enough to make this book incredibly sexy with his scraps of lesbian and gay interactions. Most of this book is spent in conflict - planetside warfare, sword fighting, and grand space battles take up most of our time. But I never once got bored. In fact I only grew more and more interested as the universe continued to reveal its inner workings and character intentions. Yoon Ha Lee's unique approach to advanced tech was delightful to experience, albeit confusing at times. For that, I almost gave this 4 stars, but the ambitious weaponry and unique mechanics are worth it if you're willing to put in the extra brainpower to understand it. All of it is just really freaking cool, and a welcome alternative to the traditional big guns and lasers that are so loved by the sci-fi genre.
Women in positions of power are also something you rarely see in sci-fi, and there are a lot of important women in Ninefox Gambit. Character-wise, I loved both Cheris and Jedao. I loved the contrast they brought to each other. I loved learning about them both and being able to experience their strange world through their eyes. There was also a point at the end where gender sort of came into play, and I felt like that whole section could only have played out as well and as cohesive as it did thanks to it being written by a trans person, but maybe I'm just biased. I loved that section though. The Gender of it all...was literary art.
Overall I genuinely have no complaints, this book is awesome, and I need to get my hands on the rest of the series ASAP.
raven stratagem ★★☆☆☆
I'll just start off by saying that I didn't like this book nearly as much as the first, and I think I can attribute that to the lack of action, which is what I found most enjoyable about ninefox gambit. Space battles take a backseat to political conversations and background maneuvers that don't make much sense until the very end. It feels drawn out and long winded, and I didn't feel invested in anything that was happening for 90% of the time. But some of the characters made it tolerable, and the prevalent subtheme of "anyone can be any gender they want and it's really not that big of a deal" meant a lot more to me than words can describe.
It's a shame I didn't enjoy this book more because this has the best casual trans representation I've ever seen. That being said, I'm not entirely sure if Brezen was meant to be a trans man or a he/him lesbian, but gender is still a point of interest with several other characters and I'm really happy with how it's been handled and the many small ways it continues to play a part.
My only other major complaint is that the main romance in this book is between two biological siblings, I really didn't like that at all, but I'm still looking forward to the 3rd and final book because at the very least Cheris is still a lovable badass and I need to see how her story ends.
First off - Yoon Ha Lee is a trans man. Having never before read a book by a trans male author, I couldn't contain my excitement upon finding out about Ninefox Gambit. Which is exactly why I had to let it sit on my shelf for several months, so that I wouldn't dive into it headfirst with my expectations through the roof only to be dissapointed. But when I finally cracked it open, I learned very quickly that I needn't worry because this book is very cool, and there's a lot to unpack here, so let's go:
There is no romance in Ninefox Gambit, but Yoon Ha Lee was still kind enough to make this book incredibly sexy with his scraps of lesbian and gay interactions. Most of this book is spent in conflict - planetside warfare, sword fighting, and grand space battles take up most of our time. But I never once got bored. In fact I only grew more and more interested as the universe continued to reveal its inner workings and character intentions. Yoon Ha Lee's unique approach to advanced tech was delightful to experience, albeit confusing at times. For that, I almost gave this 4 stars, but the ambitious weaponry and unique mechanics are worth it if you're willing to put in the extra brainpower to understand it. All of it is just really freaking cool, and a welcome alternative to the traditional big guns and lasers that are so loved by the sci-fi genre.
Women in positions of power are also something you rarely see in sci-fi, and there are a lot of important women in Ninefox Gambit. Character-wise, I loved both Cheris and Jedao. I loved the contrast they brought to each other. I loved learning about them both and being able to experience their strange world through their eyes. There was also a point at the end where gender sort of came into play, and I felt like that whole section could only have played out as well and as cohesive as it did thanks to it being written by a trans person, but maybe I'm just biased. I loved that section though. The Gender of it all...was literary art.
Overall I genuinely have no complaints, this book is awesome, and I need to get my hands on the rest of the series ASAP.
raven stratagem ★★☆☆☆
I'll just start off by saying that I didn't like this book nearly as much as the first, and I think I can attribute that to the lack of action, which is what I found most enjoyable about ninefox gambit. Space battles take a backseat to political conversations and background maneuvers that don't make much sense until the very end. It feels drawn out and long winded, and I didn't feel invested in anything that was happening for 90% of the time. But some of the characters made it tolerable, and the prevalent subtheme of "anyone can be any gender they want and it's really not that big of a deal" meant a lot more to me than words can describe.
It's a shame I didn't enjoy this book more because this has the best casual trans representation I've ever seen. That being said, I'm not entirely sure if Brezen was meant to be a trans man or a he/him lesbian, but gender is still a point of interest with several other characters and I'm really happy with how it's been handled and the many small ways it continues to play a part.
My only other major complaint is that the main romance in this book is between two biological siblings, I really didn't like that at all, but I'm still looking forward to the 3rd and final book because at the very least Cheris is still a lovable badass and I need to see how her story ends.
[2/7/2020]
mindsong ★★★★☆ by joan cox - 70s Sci-fi/Fantasy with a subtle M/M Romance
The planet is called Eden. One man, sentenced to death, will embark on a quest across wild lands, galaxy warps and space ports, to unlock an ageless mystery...
I found mindsong on the bottom shelf in the clearance section of a discount bookstore for one dollar. To say that it was a gem in the rough is an understatement. Published in 1979, I was at first drawn in by the retro painted coverart featuring a winged man - naked except for a tasteful loincloth, and beautiful. It sang to me. The weight of it in my hands was magnetic, I just had to find out what this little book, with its delightfully cute red page edges, could possibly offer.
I was unsure about including this book on this list because the gay romance isn't as explicit as it might be in modern times, and both main characters end up in lazy straight relationships. But I'm convinced that the hasty het ending was only a product of the year that it was published. And even then, the gay romance is unmistakable. I might even be so bold as to say many modern writers would not attempt to write such tenderness. It isn't just subtext. It's clear, poetic, gay love.
And I just loved this book. The writing style will not mesh well with everyone, its very floral and ambitious in what it tries to do, but that was just another plus for me. I'm adding this to the list a year after having actually read the book, so I can't go into a detailed review. But know that I hold only fondness in my heart for this scifi adventure!
mindsong ★★★★☆ by joan cox - 70s Sci-fi/Fantasy with a subtle M/M Romance
The planet is called Eden. One man, sentenced to death, will embark on a quest across wild lands, galaxy warps and space ports, to unlock an ageless mystery...
I found mindsong on the bottom shelf in the clearance section of a discount bookstore for one dollar. To say that it was a gem in the rough is an understatement. Published in 1979, I was at first drawn in by the retro painted coverart featuring a winged man - naked except for a tasteful loincloth, and beautiful. It sang to me. The weight of it in my hands was magnetic, I just had to find out what this little book, with its delightfully cute red page edges, could possibly offer.
I was unsure about including this book on this list because the gay romance isn't as explicit as it might be in modern times, and both main characters end up in lazy straight relationships. But I'm convinced that the hasty het ending was only a product of the year that it was published. And even then, the gay romance is unmistakable. I might even be so bold as to say many modern writers would not attempt to write such tenderness. It isn't just subtext. It's clear, poetic, gay love.
And I just loved this book. The writing style will not mesh well with everyone, its very floral and ambitious in what it tries to do, but that was just another plus for me. I'm adding this to the list a year after having actually read the book, so I can't go into a detailed review. But know that I hold only fondness in my heart for this scifi adventure!
[2/7/2020]
the dark beyond the stars ★★★☆☆ by frank m. robinson - Space Scifi ft. casual bisexuality
The Astron is an ancient spaceship whose only purpose is to find alien life in the universe...
This was a scifi I picked up with no expectations of it having even a hint of a trace of a microbe of LGBT content. This was in my pile of scifi books that I read when I'm not reading books for this list, because I do like to take breaks to remind myself what good fiction is supposed to feel like.
So it was to my very great surprise to find casual bisexuality aboard this spaceship adventure that I actually really enjoyed! The start of this book came on pretty strong with hints that this story would go in the direction of a main M/M romance. Unfortunately, that isn't the case, and the most we get is a handful of casual bisexual encounters. I felt like there was a major missed opportunity to tie one particular male interest back in for the ending, but overall I liked this book as a general scifi read and want to include it on this page for any other scifi lovers who want a little bit of bisexual flavor sprinkled among their stars.
the dark beyond the stars ★★★☆☆ by frank m. robinson - Space Scifi ft. casual bisexuality
The Astron is an ancient spaceship whose only purpose is to find alien life in the universe...
This was a scifi I picked up with no expectations of it having even a hint of a trace of a microbe of LGBT content. This was in my pile of scifi books that I read when I'm not reading books for this list, because I do like to take breaks to remind myself what good fiction is supposed to feel like.
So it was to my very great surprise to find casual bisexuality aboard this spaceship adventure that I actually really enjoyed! The start of this book came on pretty strong with hints that this story would go in the direction of a main M/M romance. Unfortunately, that isn't the case, and the most we get is a handful of casual bisexual encounters. I felt like there was a major missed opportunity to tie one particular male interest back in for the ending, but overall I liked this book as a general scifi read and want to include it on this page for any other scifi lovers who want a little bit of bisexual flavor sprinkled among their stars.
[2/1/2020]
on the trail to moonlight gulch ★☆☆☆☆ by shelter somerset - M/M Historical Romance
The year is 1886. Torsten is a gay 19 year old living in Chicago with his Swedish parents. Franklin is a 40 year old Civil War Veteran living alone on a homestead in the Dakota Territory. Loneliness connects them both through a mail service for singles looking for love, with Torsten posing as a woman.
This premise intrigued me. Dug up a craving for historical romance that I've been trying to keep buried. I yearned for an angsty slowburn romance set in a wilder world, with perhaps a twinge of gender crisis, if the universe would be so kind.
And for the most part, I did get that (without the gender crisis). But the writing style, with all the brisk fluidity of modern prose, consistently took me out of the experience. Where I wanted sepia tones and pungent sweat, I got HD stock photo images of a neat and clean western love story. But my gripes don't just end with the writing style.
The "love" in this love story felt weak, and the characters were unlikable. From the start, I thought Torsten was at most a 10 year old for his childish behavior. Finding out he was in fact an adult left me speechless and I almost dropped the book right then and there. But I pushed onward, hoping to find something worthwhile in the deep recesses of its pages. But Torsten never redeemed himself to me, and his love interest Franklin didn't have any substance to offer either. To top it all off, when they finally got together in a sex scene heated with dubious consent, it was immediately followed by a 4 day time skip, effectively skipping over any emotional connection we may have gotten from either of the characters.
I wanted to give this book 2 stars because I did really like the concept. But that's where the enjoyment ends. The writing, in all its facets, is weak and unremarkable. Because of that, this is probably the last book I'll be reading from dreamspinner press.
on the trail to moonlight gulch ★☆☆☆☆ by shelter somerset - M/M Historical Romance
The year is 1886. Torsten is a gay 19 year old living in Chicago with his Swedish parents. Franklin is a 40 year old Civil War Veteran living alone on a homestead in the Dakota Territory. Loneliness connects them both through a mail service for singles looking for love, with Torsten posing as a woman.
This premise intrigued me. Dug up a craving for historical romance that I've been trying to keep buried. I yearned for an angsty slowburn romance set in a wilder world, with perhaps a twinge of gender crisis, if the universe would be so kind.
And for the most part, I did get that (without the gender crisis). But the writing style, with all the brisk fluidity of modern prose, consistently took me out of the experience. Where I wanted sepia tones and pungent sweat, I got HD stock photo images of a neat and clean western love story. But my gripes don't just end with the writing style.
The "love" in this love story felt weak, and the characters were unlikable. From the start, I thought Torsten was at most a 10 year old for his childish behavior. Finding out he was in fact an adult left me speechless and I almost dropped the book right then and there. But I pushed onward, hoping to find something worthwhile in the deep recesses of its pages. But Torsten never redeemed himself to me, and his love interest Franklin didn't have any substance to offer either. To top it all off, when they finally got together in a sex scene heated with dubious consent, it was immediately followed by a 4 day time skip, effectively skipping over any emotional connection we may have gotten from either of the characters.
I wanted to give this book 2 stars because I did really like the concept. But that's where the enjoyment ends. The writing, in all its facets, is weak and unremarkable. Because of that, this is probably the last book I'll be reading from dreamspinner press.
wraeththu by storm constantine - Hermaphroditic Fantasy + Romance
content warning(s):
soulmate trope, graphic rape, murder through sex, pedophilia
wraeththu is set in a futuristic apocalyptic world where a hermaphroditic race of people (who all use he/him pronouns) have come into power and eradicated most of humanity. the books follow the lives and struggles of three different wraeththu.
volume one: the enchantments of flesh and spirit ★★★☆☆
Pellaz isn't the most interesting protagonist, but the world he lives in certainly is. Or - it promises to be. What we actually get is a suggestion of a post-apocalyptic story that only focuses on a few miserable beings that desperately don't want to accept their fate, but don't do a whole lot to avoid the destiny they claim to despise. Unremarkable drama is at the forefront of this series, but still there were a few things that I did enjoy amidst the muck: The narration style, discussions of gender identity, and a setting that kept me wanting to know more about this strange new world.
Acknowledging that cis people's understanding of gender is elementary at best, I still found the existence of wraeththu and their discussions of gender to be interesting. Though, the unsurprising erasure of trans existence does stifle the conversation, and its notions of "correct" androgyny are often reduced to "pale + skinny", I was still entertained. Not many writers take the time to explore gender expression and gender roles with such depth and attention.
But I could have happily gone without the focus on weird sex stuff. Call me old fashioned, but as a trans reader, the sex felt alienating and violent. For that reason I'm not sure who to recommend this series to, because it certainly doesn't feel like it was written for the gays or the questioning or the gender variant. It feels a little bit like going to the zoo. So heed the warnings and buy a discounted copy if you can find it, because this is a wild ride.
volume two: the bewitchments of love and hate ★★☆☆☆
Swift, our new protagonist, isn't much better than Pellaz. But he does have a little more depth to him, sometimes, so I didn't mind him. Unfortunately, his story is painfully boring. Most of his life is spent confined in one house, sheltered from the supposedly horrible outside world, and his love life is nothing but mindnumbing soulmate nonsense, where neither of them have any reason to love each other besides magic I guess?
Half of this book was a chore to read, especially the second half. Scattered throughout it are passages that titillate and stimulate the imagination in ways that bring me back to what made the first book enjoyable, but those passages are few and far between, and I had to start skim-reading in the last 1/3 just to get through to the end. Unfortunately for Constantine, I still caught whiff of the uncomfortable pedophillic implications of aging wraeththu children. Grooming, and a fixation on virginity, is prevalent. And the whole "coming of age" thing is something I'd like to scrub from my memory forever, thank you.
volume three: the fulfilments of fate and desire ★★★☆☆
At long last we get to see into the mind of the most interesting character in the wraeththu universe. I liked Calanthe's story. The adventure, the history, the drama... the urge to actually fight destiny and control his own life, unlike the previous two protagonists... Calanthe was definitely the most enjoyable one to read about. For once we actually get a character who feels alive, and not just some mindnumbing plot puppet. Reading about his life was a satisfying end to an absolute brick of an omnibus.
All in all, wraeththu is at times painfully boring with its run-on paragraphs and weak attempts at romance. At other times, refreshing in its portrayal of bodies that our society deems freakish, as instead powerful, as divine, and worthy of greatness. Constantine's reasoning behind biological mutations doesn't make any sense. Her concept of reproduction is basically glorified m-preg, and I can't say I particularly liked her weak worldbuilding or her cast of bland languid mewling sex objects that she calls characters. Did I enjoy this series? As a whole, not really. But I didn't hate it as much as I probably could have. So I guess that's my consensus on this series: freaky, wordy, but kind of cool sometimes.
the stone dance of the chameleon by ricardo pinto - M/M Fantasy
content warning(s):
offscreen incest, implied csa
volume one: the chosen ★★★☆☆
Young Carnelian is forced to leave his home on the island his family was exiled to, and return to the holy land of Osrakum to oversee the election of a new God Emperor.
Religion fascinates me. Any work of fiction that endeavors to create its own religion deep with lore and cultural effect is interesting to me. This is what I enjoyed the most about The Chosen. The worldbuilding is rich with original concepts, immersive rituals, and a persistent feeling that this world is old. The amount of detail afforded to the laws that hold this world together made me very happy.
That being said, sometimes it felt like the details were focused on the wrong things and some of the visual descriptions of places were confusing, even with the help of the three different maps included in the book. This is my biggest gripe with the book. When places are intended to be grand and opulent and beautiful, it's a little frustrating when I can't picture what exactly those things and places actually are. At that point the words turn to thesaurus sludge and my imagination hazes out to a blurry suggestion of a concept that may or may not be, but of course I can rest assured that it's beautiful, whatever it is.
Now let's talk about the characters. I don't honestly care much for Carnelian. I don't have anything bad to say about him but nothing about him stands out as interesting or unique. I expect this to change as he grows up and grows independent in the following books, but for now there isn't much to work with. The same can be said about Carnelian's love interest, who only makes his first appearance around page 370. With both of them being young teens, I found their progression of young love to be cute. Albeit overly devoted, but that's pretty typical of someone's first love. And I'm pretty invested in seeing how their relationship will progress.
Another thing I wasn't keen on is that the Masters, these beings that basically run the world, have radiant pure white skin. Not only that, there was a section where there was a group of guards made up of human men with black skin who were all treated inhumanely, to put it lightly. I find stuff like that to be in poor taste, and any character described as having pale white skin just feels sickly to me. But considering the amount of incest that is implied to occur among the purest ranks, maybe that's not far from the mark.
In conclusion, the strongest point about this book is the worldbuilding. If you like reading about fantasy religions, you might enjoy this! But I'm hoping there will be more character development in the following books. The ending was a great setup for the next book, so I have high hopes on that front. Fingers crossed!
volume two: the standing dead
[DNF - abandoned for now, might come back to it]
china mountain zhang ★★★★☆ by maureen f. mchugh - sci-fi with a gay MC
content warning(s):
r*pe, suicide
im a sucker for character-driven stories. this story follows zhang through his life in a futuristic world. though not as spacey as i like my sci-fi to be, one of the stories it follows does take place on a mars colony. and though the rest of the stories take place on earth, the planet has become a foreign world far removed from our own and zhang's story in particular takes him to some very interesting settings, so i still found this to be an enjoyable and engaging read. i will also jump at any opportunity to read about gay characters from other cultures, so zhang being part-chinese was another huge bonus. the characters feel like real people, the politics are interesting, and the settings felt rich and original.
there were a few weird one-liners, and some parts dragged on the slower side, but overall i have nothing bad to say about this book. i think anyone who enjoys character-driven stories, and sci-fi, will enjoy china mountain zhang.
im a sucker for character-driven stories. this story follows zhang through his life in a futuristic world. though not as spacey as i like my sci-fi to be, one of the stories it follows does take place on a mars colony. and though the rest of the stories take place on earth, the planet has become a foreign world far removed from our own and zhang's story in particular takes him to some very interesting settings, so i still found this to be an enjoyable and engaging read. i will also jump at any opportunity to read about gay characters from other cultures, so zhang being part-chinese was another huge bonus. the characters feel like real people, the politics are interesting, and the settings felt rich and original.
there were a few weird one-liners, and some parts dragged on the slower side, but overall i have nothing bad to say about this book. i think anyone who enjoys character-driven stories, and sci-fi, will enjoy china mountain zhang.
death's head ☆☆☆☆☆ by mel keegan - M/M space scifi
content warning(s):
r*pe, bad age differences, ableism
This book had a good setting - a cool world with cool technology, and the concept of two super soldiers having an illicit affair between high stakes missions is indeed quite sexy. In reality, this is by far one of the most boring books I've ever read. Not only that, it's poorly written.
Theres no saving grace here. I can overlook grammar and spelling mistakes, of which this book has many. But its harder to overlook character inconsistencies. I would not be able to tell you anything about either of the main characters because of how frequently their thoughts and actions would jump all over the place, and they would often have conversations that were wildly uncomfortable and jarringly unhuman. To top it all off, not even the sex was good. The entire first half of this book has a strange fixation on the sexualization of teen boys, and I'm sorry but referring to your sexual partner as "kid/kiddo" in bed, whilst you are fucking them, is the exact opposite of sexy. Later, when the two older MCs finally get to bone each other, I felt no chemistry. All the words and functions were there but by god it was like watching two mounds of soulless flesh squirm around each other. I have never been so flaccid in my life.
This book had a good setting - a cool world with cool technology, and the concept of two super soldiers having an illicit affair between high stakes missions is indeed quite sexy. In reality, this is by far one of the most boring books I've ever read. Not only that, it's poorly written.
Theres no saving grace here. I can overlook grammar and spelling mistakes, of which this book has many. But its harder to overlook character inconsistencies. I would not be able to tell you anything about either of the main characters because of how frequently their thoughts and actions would jump all over the place, and they would often have conversations that were wildly uncomfortable and jarringly unhuman. To top it all off, not even the sex was good. The entire first half of this book has a strange fixation on the sexualization of teen boys, and I'm sorry but referring to your sexual partner as "kid/kiddo" in bed, whilst you are fucking them, is the exact opposite of sexy. Later, when the two older MCs finally get to bone each other, I felt no chemistry. All the words and functions were there but by god it was like watching two mounds of soulless flesh squirm around each other. I have never been so flaccid in my life.
the phoenix ★★★★☆ by ruth sims - M/M Historical Fiction
content warning(s):
religion, minor homophobia
Kit is a devilishly charming actor. Nick is a serious yet caring physician. And together, they are soulmates. Set in the 1880s/1890s we follow Kit and Nick separately as they grow up in Europe and become the men who will eventually meet, to become lovers, and so much more. The romance on these pages is dizzying. Heart-racing. Sweet. Dramatic. And always palpable. On more than one occasion I had to stand up and get a glass of water and wait for my pulse to settle before diving back in.
At times the writing felt a bit stiff and abrupt, but the story was original and the characters had depth (Kit moreso than Nick, if I'm honest). The plot twists kept me engaged and though I wasn't a fan of every single one of them, they sure kept my nose glued to the spine. So they definitely got their job done.
What a relief it was to read this obvious labor of love after the colossal failure which was the last historical fiction I had the misfortune of experiencing. There is no doubt to be had about the depth of the love these two men have for each other, despite their hardships. If you love drama and pining and passion and love stories that span across years and distance, this might just be for you!
Kit is a devilishly charming actor. Nick is a serious yet caring physician. And together, they are soulmates. Set in the 1880s/1890s we follow Kit and Nick separately as they grow up in Europe and become the men who will eventually meet, to become lovers, and so much more. The romance on these pages is dizzying. Heart-racing. Sweet. Dramatic. And always palpable. On more than one occasion I had to stand up and get a glass of water and wait for my pulse to settle before diving back in.
At times the writing felt a bit stiff and abrupt, but the story was original and the characters had depth (Kit moreso than Nick, if I'm honest). The plot twists kept me engaged and though I wasn't a fan of every single one of them, they sure kept my nose glued to the spine. So they definitely got their job done.
What a relief it was to read this obvious labor of love after the colossal failure which was the last historical fiction I had the misfortune of experiencing. There is no doubt to be had about the depth of the love these two men have for each other, despite their hardships. If you love drama and pining and passion and love stories that span across years and distance, this might just be for you!
raised by wolves by w.a.hoffman - M/M Historical Fiction
content warning(s):
references to past sexual abuse and incest
volume one: brethren ★★☆☆☆
This series follows William Marsdale, a bisexual man with a preference for men, as he travels to Jamaica in 1667 and joins a group of buccaneers. There he quickly falls in love with both the raiding lifestyle and a fellow buccaneer. This man is Gaston the Ghoul, who quickly proves to be just as fucked up as Will in his own way. Together they endeavor to begin the long process of healing old wounds so that they may love each other without their demons tearing them apart.
It's been a very long time since I read any book with such speed and enthusiasm. I'm always hesitant to read historical fiction because I don't want to read about homophobia, but Will is adamant about his need to be with a man without fear or shame, from the very start, and becoming a buccaneer offers him that exact freedom.
Will and Gaston are at times too cute to bear, and other times borderline obsessive. But I have a soft spot for stories about healing and that is very much the main focus here. As such, some of the themes are very dark. But I felt they were treated with respect, instead of the perverse misery offered by other writers (EDIT: This respect is entirely redacted in volume two). It also explores a fear of sex that has nothing to with homophobia. This leads to physical intimacy being explored in other avenues, which is something I feel is severely lacking in gay fiction. There's nothing wrong with some good old fashioned intercourse but let's not undervalue the romance of hand kissing and casual caresses.
Beyond that, I found the plot and setting and side characters to be fun! There's gay romance among some of the other buccaneers, and I learned a lot about buccaneers in general, as my only prior knowledge of pirates comes from religiously watching Black Sails. On the flip side, this book contains some of the expected downsides to historical fiction, such as slavery and the sexualization of teen girls.
Overall I enjoyed most of this book. But, it fell apart in the end and book two offers no redemption.
volume two: matelots ☆☆☆☆☆ (DNF)
I was a fool for thinking the end of the first book was the climax of Will and Gaston's issues. I believed the natural progression from rock bottom would be up, but Hoffman took me by surprise by bringing out a pickax and tunneling so much deeper that I couldn't stomach reading any more. The first rule of minecraft is to never dig directly down. Within the first 100 pages of Matelots I found myself swimming in lava.
I'll admit I overlooked a few of the sketchy topics in the first book because I really wanted to like it, but Hoffman completely retracted any tact or grace or dignity she pretended to have in the first book and all the ugliness jumps out in this one. The perversion really shines with her decision to write Will and Gaston (both 27 year old men) getting hard from the thought of having sex with a 15 year old girl. In that very same chapter Will admits to Gaston he wants to be r*ped by him, and Gaston only gets sexually aroused by the thought of having sex with Will if it's r*pe. And this is supposed to be tragic? or acceptable because they're both traumatized? Fuck off. Fuck right off. It takes a lot for me to not finish a book but this is reprehensible. Which is extremely disappointing as I really wanted a lengthy series about gay pirates, but I guess I'll have to go back to rewatching Black Sails for my fix.
a companion to wolves ★★☆☆☆ by sarah monette and elizabeth bear - Mature Fantasy
content warning(s):
dubious consent
I’m not entirely sure if A Companion To Wolves belongs on this list because the main character, Isolfr, is as straight as they come. But, as weird and uncomfortable as it sounds, he has sex with a lot of men. And some of these men, who have the misfortune of falling in love with Isolfr, are gay. So here we are, and here I am to say some choice words about Elizabeth Bear yet again, whom I just can't seem to give up on.
A Companion To Wolves is a story (very very) loosely inspired by old norse mythology, about wolves and the men that bond with them to form warrior wolf packs. Bonding with a wolf allows you to share things with your wolf that wolfless men cannot. Smells, thoughts, and feelings are just some of the things that can be shared across the bond. And for some weirdass reason, mating instincts are also required to be shared, and there's nothing you can do about it. So yes, this means that straight men are often forced to have sex other men. And because its all done in the heat of...heat, consent becomes a foreign concept. Reading about a man- gay or straight- having sex against his will, is never sexy. Even when you remove the free will of both parties, as in this case.
Since I haven't read anything by Sarah Monette before this, I can't vouch for her. For now I can only speak my thoughts on Bear, and I think what pisses me off most is that she's shown herself capable of writing compelling, tender, loving gay relationships - as seen with the side characters in this book, and a few rare scenes in the Edda of Burdens. Why then chose to torture your gays? Or worse, leave them on the sidelines? The potential is there, and I so badly want it to be on the forefront. I want these scraps of romance, the hints and teases, to be the main story. Because Bear's writing is so beautiful and I can only imagine what it would be like if her leading characters weren't so aggressively straight.
All that being said, I couldn't put down this book. I'm a sucker for old norse inspired settings, and Elizabeth Bear knows how to write stories that beckon, and spin, and excite the senses. Which is exactly why I keep coming back for more even when it hurts.
the tempering of men ★☆☆☆☆
The sequel to A Companion To Wolves is a boring slog. I was happy to focus on characters other than Isolfr, and the budding consensual romance between two actually gay characters in the beginning was very promising. Just what I wanted, right? But after that...nothing interesting happened. And that can be attributed to both the dispassionate writing and the weak plot strewn across bland passages of a quieter life than the first book. The ending of this book should not have been an ending, but instead a midpoint, to cut out several useless chapters and to provide room for something actually interesting to happen afterward. I want to read more about this world and its characters but this sequel is in dire need of heavy editing. I don't know how involved Bear was this book but there was a significant shift in tone which makes me question if she cared about it at all. I know I said I wanted gay romance in this series, but the tradeoff wasn't worth it.
Another thing that bugged me was the sloppy attempt at trans representation, if it can even be called that. In this world there are “sworn-men”, which are girls forced to live the rest of their lives as men. Some even go through hormone treatment (!!!!) and surgery. I posted the whole passage [here]. These aren't trans men - transition isn't a choice for these girls. It's a means to a rise in status and quality of life, at the minor cost of having your womanhood stripped away from you. If an author is willing to include literal hormone treatments and gender affirming surgeries in their fantasy world, I would have liked to read about actual trans men. Instead this feels like my experiences as a trans person have been stolen for the benefit of cis people.
As if that wasn't enough, there was also a race of creatures that allowed members of their clan to live as women, as “mothers”, even if they were born male. This was even considered an honorable thing to do...but they're still referred to with he/him pronouns. In other words, individuals who personally choose to live as women are called he/him, while the aforementioned girls who have no choice but to live as men are also referred to as he/him. Like…….yeah alright.
It almost seems like a well meaning attempt at trans integration in a fantasy world, but ends up completely missing the mark. I won't be reading the 3rd book.
I’m not entirely sure if A Companion To Wolves belongs on this list because the main character, Isolfr, is as straight as they come. But, as weird and uncomfortable as it sounds, he has sex with a lot of men. And some of these men, who have the misfortune of falling in love with Isolfr, are gay. So here we are, and here I am to say some choice words about Elizabeth Bear yet again, whom I just can't seem to give up on.
A Companion To Wolves is a story (very very) loosely inspired by old norse mythology, about wolves and the men that bond with them to form warrior wolf packs. Bonding with a wolf allows you to share things with your wolf that wolfless men cannot. Smells, thoughts, and feelings are just some of the things that can be shared across the bond. And for some weirdass reason, mating instincts are also required to be shared, and there's nothing you can do about it. So yes, this means that straight men are often forced to have sex other men. And because its all done in the heat of...heat, consent becomes a foreign concept. Reading about a man- gay or straight- having sex against his will, is never sexy. Even when you remove the free will of both parties, as in this case.
Since I haven't read anything by Sarah Monette before this, I can't vouch for her. For now I can only speak my thoughts on Bear, and I think what pisses me off most is that she's shown herself capable of writing compelling, tender, loving gay relationships - as seen with the side characters in this book, and a few rare scenes in the Edda of Burdens. Why then chose to torture your gays? Or worse, leave them on the sidelines? The potential is there, and I so badly want it to be on the forefront. I want these scraps of romance, the hints and teases, to be the main story. Because Bear's writing is so beautiful and I can only imagine what it would be like if her leading characters weren't so aggressively straight.
All that being said, I couldn't put down this book. I'm a sucker for old norse inspired settings, and Elizabeth Bear knows how to write stories that beckon, and spin, and excite the senses. Which is exactly why I keep coming back for more even when it hurts.
the tempering of men ★☆☆☆☆
The sequel to A Companion To Wolves is a boring slog. I was happy to focus on characters other than Isolfr, and the budding consensual romance between two actually gay characters in the beginning was very promising. Just what I wanted, right? But after that...nothing interesting happened. And that can be attributed to both the dispassionate writing and the weak plot strewn across bland passages of a quieter life than the first book. The ending of this book should not have been an ending, but instead a midpoint, to cut out several useless chapters and to provide room for something actually interesting to happen afterward. I want to read more about this world and its characters but this sequel is in dire need of heavy editing. I don't know how involved Bear was this book but there was a significant shift in tone which makes me question if she cared about it at all. I know I said I wanted gay romance in this series, but the tradeoff wasn't worth it.
Another thing that bugged me was the sloppy attempt at trans representation, if it can even be called that. In this world there are “sworn-men”, which are girls forced to live the rest of their lives as men. Some even go through hormone treatment (!!!!) and surgery. I posted the whole passage [here]. These aren't trans men - transition isn't a choice for these girls. It's a means to a rise in status and quality of life, at the minor cost of having your womanhood stripped away from you. If an author is willing to include literal hormone treatments and gender affirming surgeries in their fantasy world, I would have liked to read about actual trans men. Instead this feels like my experiences as a trans person have been stolen for the benefit of cis people.
As if that wasn't enough, there was also a race of creatures that allowed members of their clan to live as women, as “mothers”, even if they were born male. This was even considered an honorable thing to do...but they're still referred to with he/him pronouns. In other words, individuals who personally choose to live as women are called he/him, while the aforementioned girls who have no choice but to live as men are also referred to as he/him. Like…….yeah alright.
It almost seems like a well meaning attempt at trans integration in a fantasy world, but ends up completely missing the mark. I won't be reading the 3rd book.
the fire’s stone ★★★★☆ by tanya huff - M/M Fantasy
An unlikely trio go on an adventure to retrieve a magic rock, and find themselves along the way.
It is so easy to fall in love with Tanya Huff's characters. The romance in The Fire's Stone is between two bisexual men and features my most favorite trope of all; enemies to friends to lovers. Fuck me up with that shit any day of the week, I live for it! Though the enemies portion was somewhat short lived, it still managed to scratch that itch and I wish I could've kept reading about them for a little while longer.
I will say that the choice for Aaron’s previous love interest was very odd, but that's the only bad thing I have to say about this book. I really appreciated the girl characters, the morals, and the overall message. Many gay books lack all three of these qualities and suffer for it. But this is a story with gay romance, not a story written for gay romance. And those are exactly the types of stories I will continue to seek out and point at and say this is it.
I bought an edition of this book that was paired with another short story by Tanya Huff called ‘Gate of Darkness, Circle of Light’ which primarily features an M/F romance, but also did a lovely job of showing a straight man coming to terms with the fact that, despite what his entire life has led him to believe, he is capable of loving another man, with both his heart and his body, and grows to accept the idea with kindness. That's as far as the gay goes in that novel but its still a lovely story as well, if you find yourself comparing editions.
An unlikely trio go on an adventure to retrieve a magic rock, and find themselves along the way.
It is so easy to fall in love with Tanya Huff's characters. The romance in The Fire's Stone is between two bisexual men and features my most favorite trope of all; enemies to friends to lovers. Fuck me up with that shit any day of the week, I live for it! Though the enemies portion was somewhat short lived, it still managed to scratch that itch and I wish I could've kept reading about them for a little while longer.
I will say that the choice for Aaron’s previous love interest was very odd, but that's the only bad thing I have to say about this book. I really appreciated the girl characters, the morals, and the overall message. Many gay books lack all three of these qualities and suffer for it. But this is a story with gay romance, not a story written for gay romance. And those are exactly the types of stories I will continue to seek out and point at and say this is it.
I bought an edition of this book that was paired with another short story by Tanya Huff called ‘Gate of Darkness, Circle of Light’ which primarily features an M/F romance, but also did a lovely job of showing a straight man coming to terms with the fact that, despite what his entire life has led him to believe, he is capable of loving another man, with both his heart and his body, and grows to accept the idea with kindness. That's as far as the gay goes in that novel but its still a lovely story as well, if you find yourself comparing editions.
satellite ★★★★☆ by nick lake - Space Scifi with a gay MC
To me, any book that urges me to feel excited to be alive is a good book. I felt that from start to finish with this story. Satellite puts you in the shoes of a boy who was born on a space station, named Leo. and Leo is gay, but there's no romance. Not in the traditional sense. It's still a romantic book in the way that Leo views the world, in the way that his heart pulls gently at those who pass through his orbital trajectory, seeking reciprocation as a function of his very nature. Seeking for a place to call home.
Space Sci-fi is my favorite genre but it very rarely overlaps with actual gay characters, so I get really excited when it does! And this was an excellent addition to the genre. Another thing I really liked about this book, rather unexpectedly, was how normalized it was for men to wear makeup and feminine fashion, even if they happen to be in a position of power, and very straight. I’ve never consumed a piece of media that wasn't afraid to give straight men nail polish and eyeshadow. It was a small detail, but one that persisted and wouldn't stand to be ignored. And I really appreciated that.
The plot was a little dry and predictable at moments, but the journey was still worth it.
To me, any book that urges me to feel excited to be alive is a good book. I felt that from start to finish with this story. Satellite puts you in the shoes of a boy who was born on a space station, named Leo. and Leo is gay, but there's no romance. Not in the traditional sense. It's still a romantic book in the way that Leo views the world, in the way that his heart pulls gently at those who pass through his orbital trajectory, seeking reciprocation as a function of his very nature. Seeking for a place to call home.
Space Sci-fi is my favorite genre but it very rarely overlaps with actual gay characters, so I get really excited when it does! And this was an excellent addition to the genre. Another thing I really liked about this book, rather unexpectedly, was how normalized it was for men to wear makeup and feminine fashion, even if they happen to be in a position of power, and very straight. I’ve never consumed a piece of media that wasn't afraid to give straight men nail polish and eyeshadow. It was a small detail, but one that persisted and wouldn't stand to be ignored. And I really appreciated that.
The plot was a little dry and predictable at moments, but the journey was still worth it.
warchild series by karin lowachee - Space Sci-fi
warchild ★★★★★
content warning(s):
csa, r*pe, PTSD
This is sci-fi. Deep sci-fi. None of that soft baby sci-fi. This is aliens and space pirates and intergalactic war, and you get thrown right into the thick of it. My notes for this book consist almost entirely of two words; ‘immersion’, and ‘fuck’. The latter because that's what was going through my head from start to finish, just a thick steady chorus of oh fuck, oh shit, and holy smokes! I loved being immersed in this book. The aliens in this universe have their own made-up language and Lowachee was not afraid to make us learn the vocabulary. I really appreciate the extra efforts writers will go through for solid worldbuilding, and I love languages, so I really enjoyed that attention to detail.
Our main character is a kid who has seen and been through far too much, so don't expect any gay stuff on that front. There's still subtext and one-sided gay flirting from side characters, but Jos is a child with a lot of issues. The real meaty gay stuff doesn't come in until book 3, and even then its not the focus of the story. So if you want romance, you wont find it here. But if you want cool sci-fi that deals with the ugly realities of war, with minor gay seasoning, just enough to give your senses a tingle if you pay attention past the politics and violence going on, then this series might be for you!
My only complaint about the book is the weird abundance of…blond characters. Which isn't something that ruins the story by any means but it is a weird enough detail to give me pause and make me wonder what was going on. Karin, if you're out there, I'd love to know the thought process behind this design choice. Please get back to me.
burndive ★★☆☆☆
Our main character is a kid who has seen and been through far too much, so don't expect any gay stuff on that front. There's still subtext and one-sided gay flirting from side characters, but Jos is a child with a lot of issues. The real meaty gay stuff doesn't come in until book 3, and even then its not the focus of the story. So if you want romance, you wont find it here. But if you want cool sci-fi that deals with the ugly realities of war, with minor gay seasoning, just enough to give your senses a tingle if you pay attention past the politics and violence going on, then this series might be for you!
My only complaint about the book is the weird abundance of…blond characters. Which isn't something that ruins the story by any means but it is a weird enough detail to give me pause and make me wonder what was going on. Karin, if you're out there, I'd love to know the thought process behind this design choice. Please get back to me.
burndive ★★☆☆☆
content warning(s):
heterosexuality, drug use
In Burndive, we move away from the guts of war and get a closer look at civilian life and politics. Each book in this series follows a new character and unfortunately Ryan is a brat, and the least interesting character in the universe. The plot crawls at a snail pace and all Ryan does is drag his feet after it. My interest entirely relied on anyone and everyone that wasn't Ryan because there's no shortage of interesting characters in this world, but Ryan has the personality of an angsty toothpick. And I didn't even hate the guy, there just wasn't much to like.
Plot-wise there was none of the excitement that I loved about Warchild, until the very end, and at that point I was mostly excited to be nearly done with Ryan at last and for good.
Amazingly, the amount of blond characters only continues to increase and has become somewhat comical at this point.
cagebird ★★★★☆
Plot-wise there was none of the excitement that I loved about Warchild, until the very end, and at that point I was mostly excited to be nearly done with Ryan at last and for good.
Amazingly, the amount of blond characters only continues to increase and has become somewhat comical at this point.
cagebird ★★★★☆
content warning(s):
self harm (cutting), csa, r*pe, pedophilia
In Cagebird, we’re back to the war, this time following the beautiful and ruthless space pirate Yuri Kirov. He's a criminal, a Russian, and about as fucked up as they come. I have to say, I've never before had the joy of reading about a Russian man who got romantically involved with other men. Needless to say, as a gay Russian myself, it was a near holy experience. To see him speak the Russian words I grew up with, and then later see him curled in the arms of another man, was beyond beautiful, and very important to me, and I don't think i’ll see it again for a long time. If ever.
Onto the more distasteful aspects of this book, the csa is...expected, but not any easier to stomach. I won't bother getting into why it's reprehensible and poor taste to write these scenes in detail, so just heed the warnings. At least the kids get their justice eventually, but I don't feel like giving out brownie points either way.
Everything else about Yuri’s story was golden. It's painful and extremely troubled but he’s enjoyable to read about and I love him so much. And I love the kind endings Lowachee allows her characters to have.
Onto the more distasteful aspects of this book, the csa is...expected, but not any easier to stomach. I won't bother getting into why it's reprehensible and poor taste to write these scenes in detail, so just heed the warnings. At least the kids get their justice eventually, but I don't feel like giving out brownie points either way.
Everything else about Yuri’s story was golden. It's painful and extremely troubled but he’s enjoyable to read about and I love him so much. And I love the kind endings Lowachee allows her characters to have.
the architect and the castle of glass ★★★☆☆ by jade mere - M/M paranormal fantasy romance
Tahki wants to be a famous architect. In order to do that, he has to abandon his home, sneak into a foreign country, and win 1st place at the world fair. A simple plan on paper, but reality unfolds into a mystical nightmare.
I have nothing bad to say about this book. It has lovable characters, lovely world-building, cool settings, mysterious intrigue, and a cute little romance on the side. It's a shorter story, slapping in at just over 200 pages, but the pacing was nice and a lot was accomplished, so again, no complaints there.
This book was like a tasty sandwich. Quick to eat, satisfying, and filled with a mysterious condiment that gave my senses something new and pleasant to experience. It isn't anything that will stick with me for decades, but it's a good book and i’ll be keeping my eyes open for future works from Jade Mere.
Tahki wants to be a famous architect. In order to do that, he has to abandon his home, sneak into a foreign country, and win 1st place at the world fair. A simple plan on paper, but reality unfolds into a mystical nightmare.
I have nothing bad to say about this book. It has lovable characters, lovely world-building, cool settings, mysterious intrigue, and a cute little romance on the side. It's a shorter story, slapping in at just over 200 pages, but the pacing was nice and a lot was accomplished, so again, no complaints there.
This book was like a tasty sandwich. Quick to eat, satisfying, and filled with a mysterious condiment that gave my senses something new and pleasant to experience. It isn't anything that will stick with me for decades, but it's a good book and i’ll be keeping my eyes open for future works from Jade Mere.
wolfsong ★★★★☆ by TJ klune - M/M fantasy romance
Do you like wolves? Giant werewolves? Really big dudes with warm hearts and big shiny teeth? Me too. I have a whole section of my heart dedicated to my somewhat secret love of werewolves. At first I was worried this book would turn out to be an officially published A/B/O work of fiction. No shame on you if that's your thing, I've read several A/B/O fics by my own free will, but I hoping for something different with this story and thankfully, it is different.
Tthe style of writing, a constant stream of raw consciousness, had me hooked by page 4. It works very well with the theme of werewolves and how their minds work - I was absolutely enraptured for the first 2/3 of the book. I carried the book with me from room to room and paused only to let the words sink in through my fingertips as I brushed them against the text. And then...the writing style kind of backfired. The story started to drag its feet as everyone talked about their feelings and I wasn't a fan of that. I know that's cynical of me but I couldn't help it, it was just too perfect. Many times I've been frustrated by how easily conflict could be solved in other stories if they just talked it out, but when Wolfsong did just that, it felt too clean.
I also want to mention the weird age gap. It had me worried for a while but it was handled as well as it could have been (though I wish it wasnt like that in the first place), and nothing happens between the love interests until theyre both over 20.
In conclusion; after the slow conflict resolution was over, the ending itself had me gripping the pages once more and I'm glad for that. My cynicism didn't allow me to appreciate the manner in which it was resolved but I admit thats entirely on me. So yes, this is a good gay werewolf book. I hope there will be more to come.
Do you like wolves? Giant werewolves? Really big dudes with warm hearts and big shiny teeth? Me too. I have a whole section of my heart dedicated to my somewhat secret love of werewolves. At first I was worried this book would turn out to be an officially published A/B/O work of fiction. No shame on you if that's your thing, I've read several A/B/O fics by my own free will, but I hoping for something different with this story and thankfully, it is different.
Tthe style of writing, a constant stream of raw consciousness, had me hooked by page 4. It works very well with the theme of werewolves and how their minds work - I was absolutely enraptured for the first 2/3 of the book. I carried the book with me from room to room and paused only to let the words sink in through my fingertips as I brushed them against the text. And then...the writing style kind of backfired. The story started to drag its feet as everyone talked about their feelings and I wasn't a fan of that. I know that's cynical of me but I couldn't help it, it was just too perfect. Many times I've been frustrated by how easily conflict could be solved in other stories if they just talked it out, but when Wolfsong did just that, it felt too clean.
I also want to mention the weird age gap. It had me worried for a while but it was handled as well as it could have been (though I wish it wasnt like that in the first place), and nothing happens between the love interests until theyre both over 20.
In conclusion; after the slow conflict resolution was over, the ending itself had me gripping the pages once more and I'm glad for that. My cynicism didn't allow me to appreciate the manner in which it was resolved but I admit thats entirely on me. So yes, this is a good gay werewolf book. I hope there will be more to come.
an arrow’s flight ★★★☆☆ by mark merlis - M/M
Neoptolemus - Son of Achilles, the one prophecised to end the Trojan War and whose name means The New War. In this case, the war is AIDS.
Set in an alternate, modern version of the Illiad, the ancient characters of the old legends navigate a world set on the precipice of the AIDS crisis - before the death, before the fear and the sadness. The tragedies are foretold and expected, at all times you know what the ending will be, but I really enjoyed the journey. It's a raw view into what it was like to be a gay man in the before times.
I didn't think I would like the modern spin on an old story, I'm not a fan of modern settings in general, so part 1 was a little lackluster to me. But once we got out of the city I was hooked. And I adored the prevalent voice of the narrator all throughout the book. It made the story more real, and at times funny too!
Neoptolemus - Son of Achilles, the one prophecised to end the Trojan War and whose name means The New War. In this case, the war is AIDS.
Set in an alternate, modern version of the Illiad, the ancient characters of the old legends navigate a world set on the precipice of the AIDS crisis - before the death, before the fear and the sadness. The tragedies are foretold and expected, at all times you know what the ending will be, but I really enjoyed the journey. It's a raw view into what it was like to be a gay man in the before times.
I didn't think I would like the modern spin on an old story, I'm not a fan of modern settings in general, so part 1 was a little lackluster to me. But once we got out of the city I was hooked. And I adored the prevalent voice of the narrator all throughout the book. It made the story more real, and at times funny too!
tin man ★★★★☆ by lisa henry and heidi belleau - M/M dystopian fiction
Romance blooms in an unlikely place between two opposing sides in a dystopian city. I have to say, I liked this more than I thought I would! The premise is kind of ridiculous but the writing was good and the sex was steamy and the bonding was sweet. This book is very short so the plot is fairly small, but I liked everything that did happen. Each scene had a clear purpose, there was no word fluff, so the resulting feeling is very clean and straight-forward.
Also, I LOVED the theme of finding freedom and salvation in being gay (as a verb). It also contained this legendary line that is quite frankly god tier literature.
Romance blooms in an unlikely place between two opposing sides in a dystopian city. I have to say, I liked this more than I thought I would! The premise is kind of ridiculous but the writing was good and the sex was steamy and the bonding was sweet. This book is very short so the plot is fairly small, but I liked everything that did happen. Each scene had a clear purpose, there was no word fluff, so the resulting feeling is very clean and straight-forward.
Also, I LOVED the theme of finding freedom and salvation in being gay (as a verb). It also contained this legendary line that is quite frankly god tier literature.
we are the ants ★★★★★ by shaun david hutchinson - YA? sci-fi? idk there's aliens and the MC is gay
content warning(s):
suicide, underage drug + alcohol use, attempted r*pe
Every now and then, Henry gets abducted by aliens. One day they tell him the world will end in 144 days and let him decide whether or not its worth saving.
Where do I start with a book as personal as this? Despite how it grabs at the messiest parts of who I am as a human—and my most painful memories—and throws them onto an examination table, I think the theme is universal. That is; you can't chose how you die, but you can chose how you live.
This one is kind of a quick read but I had to keep pausing and rereading to really allow it to soak into my brain. It's not a difficult read but I found it to be a lot to process. I was glad for the bits of humor and beauty and love, which made the journey a little less heavy. And surprisingly, I don't feel heavy at all after finishing it. I'm feeling a lot of things, but heavy is not one of them. I really loved this book because it didn't try to be anything incredibly profound or groundbreaking. It's just...real. And hopefully something that I will continue to carry with me through life for however long that may be.
the last herald-mage trilogy ★★★★★ by mercedes lackey - M/M fantasy
content warning(s):
suicide, violent rape, homophobia, skeevy age differences
A story about loss and Gay Loneliness™ and how “words can heal—words and love together can more often achieve what magic cannot.”
I went into this series braced for immense sadness, and instead got a 900 page slow burn journey of recovery, healing, and hope. Some really sad things do happen, for sure. But there was a very deliberate choice made by the author to focus on how to overcome those sorrows - to continue to live despite the pain. And how, with love and compassion, you can become whole again.
Vanyel is a hero. Not only for his legendary deeds to the kingdom of Valdemar, but for his simple act of living despite his grief and the heavy pain of having a homophobic family. He prevails, and becomes a truly remarkable person. Now, I wish there had been more written about the early parts of his relationships with Tylendal and Stefen (I want that hot spring scene). But that's a minor gripe, because this series also contains several of the bad tropes that plague gay characters, so take a glance at that CW list if that matters to you. I have a huge issue with something that happens at the end of book 3. At this point it feels redundant to complain because I cry about it in half my reviews but it especially felt out of place in this one.
Vanyel and everything he stands for is a blessing to the realm of gay leads in fiction. I don't know anyone else who would fit the title of ‘gay hero’ any better. Overall this series strengthened my soul. It picked me up off the ground, held me in it's gentle arms and told me that I'm going to be okay.
EDIT 10/4/18: It’s been a year now since I finished this series and now when I look back at it, all I'm left with is a sour taste. The ending of a series is what sticks with you. Sometimes the best books leave you with questions, they leave you wondering, and offer the reader an opportunity for their minds to fill in the ending they want. Stories plant themselves in your mind and take on their own personal meanings. But a lot of that depends on the ending, and the ending of the last herald mage trilogy is an insult to gay fiction. I can't move passed it. Yes I still enjoyed the leadup, and I still love Vanyel very much, which only adds fuel to my opinion that his disrespectful ending was undeserved, and shockingly unnecessary.
So I’ll continue my search for better fantasy books with magical gay protagonist heroes. This cannot, and should not, be the best.
welcome to night vale (the novel) ★★☆☆☆ by joseph fink + jeffrey cranor - various LGBT side characters
I wasn’t sure if I would allow this on the list because the two main characters aren't LGBT, but I decided it's worth it and here’s why; you know how there are so many shows/books/games that draw you in by boasting diversity? And then when you give it a try, you see that the "diversity" only amounts to one or two poorly researched characters with no substance and even less screen time? WTNV doesn't boast diversity, they normalize it. They let it breathe, and live, and be human. Or, well, not always human. Night Vale is a pretty weird town.
I'm posting this review for the handful of people who might not have listened to the iconic podcast before, of which the main character Cecil, the literal voice of night vale, is a gay man who’s in a beautiful relationship with a very handsome and smart scientist. They both take a backseat in this novel but their presence is still integral to the town.
I think a lot of people can enjoy WTNV even if they don't like paranormal horror. I was really surprised that my mom happened to take a liking to Cecil when I played a few episodes in the car (to be fair, he’s very charming). It's funny, and it makes me feel good. It's comforting. WTNV is one of my most favorite creative works ever made. So why didn't I give the novel a higher rating? I thought the pacing was way too sluggish. It was super cool to experience the town in a perspective other than Cecil’s but man it felt like I was dragging myself through water sometimes. It's still a solid story and I'm excited for the next book! (EDIT: ‘It Devours’ was thankfully a much more cohesive and enjoyable experience.)
I wasn’t sure if I would allow this on the list because the two main characters aren't LGBT, but I decided it's worth it and here’s why; you know how there are so many shows/books/games that draw you in by boasting diversity? And then when you give it a try, you see that the "diversity" only amounts to one or two poorly researched characters with no substance and even less screen time? WTNV doesn't boast diversity, they normalize it. They let it breathe, and live, and be human. Or, well, not always human. Night Vale is a pretty weird town.
I'm posting this review for the handful of people who might not have listened to the iconic podcast before, of which the main character Cecil, the literal voice of night vale, is a gay man who’s in a beautiful relationship with a very handsome and smart scientist. They both take a backseat in this novel but their presence is still integral to the town.
I think a lot of people can enjoy WTNV even if they don't like paranormal horror. I was really surprised that my mom happened to take a liking to Cecil when I played a few episodes in the car (to be fair, he’s very charming). It's funny, and it makes me feel good. It's comforting. WTNV is one of my most favorite creative works ever made. So why didn't I give the novel a higher rating? I thought the pacing was way too sluggish. It was super cool to experience the town in a perspective other than Cecil’s but man it felt like I was dragging myself through water sometimes. It's still a solid story and I'm excited for the next book! (EDIT: ‘It Devours’ was thankfully a much more cohesive and enjoyable experience.)
the gentleman’s guide to vice and virtue ★★★☆☆ by mackenzi lee - M/M YA historical adventure romance
content warning(s):
time period specific racism, violent homophobia
This book is an adventure. It takes place in the early 1700's as our main character tries to go on a tour of Europe, until misfortune befalls him and his traveling companions.
First of all I loved the MC. Monty is flirty and fun and feels absolutely no self worth. He’s also in love with his best friend and is determined to make the most of his time spent with said friend on their tour. But when shit starts to hit the fan, it really gets messy. I highly recommend going into this book as blind as possible because the highlight of this book was feeling just as clueless as the characters and genuinely surprised every time something went wrong. So that's all i’ll say about the plot.
Percy is Monty’s best friend and love interest and I really hoped he’d get more depth. When reading romance novels I have an expectation to fall in love with the MC’s interest. But there wasn't a lot to work with this time. It's not a huge deal considering its not just a romance novel. And I fell in love with Monty instead so I'm pretty happy with how it all turned out. I love the way this book wrote gays into a historical context. We may be absent from history books but we’ve always been here. I appreciate the level of research that went into this story, and the decision to make Monty absolutely shameless in his love for men.
Overall this is a good book but it didn't impact me or stun me in any way. It's a simple + clean read - about as much as you can expect from YA.
First of all I loved the MC. Monty is flirty and fun and feels absolutely no self worth. He’s also in love with his best friend and is determined to make the most of his time spent with said friend on their tour. But when shit starts to hit the fan, it really gets messy. I highly recommend going into this book as blind as possible because the highlight of this book was feeling just as clueless as the characters and genuinely surprised every time something went wrong. So that's all i’ll say about the plot.
Percy is Monty’s best friend and love interest and I really hoped he’d get more depth. When reading romance novels I have an expectation to fall in love with the MC’s interest. But there wasn't a lot to work with this time. It's not a huge deal considering its not just a romance novel. And I fell in love with Monty instead so I'm pretty happy with how it all turned out. I love the way this book wrote gays into a historical context. We may be absent from history books but we’ve always been here. I appreciate the level of research that went into this story, and the decision to make Monty absolutely shameless in his love for men.
Overall this is a good book but it didn't impact me or stun me in any way. It's a simple + clean read - about as much as you can expect from YA.
champion of the scarlet wolf (books 1 + 2) ★★★★☆ by ginn hale - M/M fantasy romance
This is a sequel to Lord of the White Hell.
Knowing this sequel would follow Elezar, Javier’s friend from the first 2 books, I didn’t expect much. I didn’t feel much for him from what we were shown previously. But this sequel ended up doing more than just blowing my socks off. Once again, I feel just as healed and shaken as LOTWH left me.
The story of Elezar and his witch lover Skellan is much bigger and way more ambitious than the previous story. At times I didn’t know if the magic could really be pulled off - but everything, all the magic and battles and magic battles were believable and at no point did I think ‘this is too corny’ which is sometimes the case with fantasy novels. No, this was good. So fucking good. I LOVED all the original concepts and just how far it went into wild imagination. I can't give it 5 stars because the pacing fell off track at times, but I’ll chalk that up to bad editing, not bad writing.
The timeframe takes place 5 years after LOTWH, and I was very skeptical about how Elezar’s story would go, considering his role in LOTWH. But being able to experience his journey and growth and healing was much better than if the sequel had been about Javier and Kiram, as much as I love them. Elezar and Skellan make such a unique and beautiful match I'm in tears as I write this. They had such good fresh chemistry, and fun interactions, and good honest love for each other. And Kiram + Javier show up in this sequel too! They aren't the main focus of course but yes they are there and are treated well.
Let me also talk about Skellan for a second. Besides loving his name, he has the best concept for a witch I've ever read. In fact, Ginn Hale is very good at writing characters that feel unique and real, and she crushes a lot of the boring tropes in the M/M genre. That is a huge reason why this series is so refreshing and brimming with high quality writing.
In short, everything felt good. This series made me so happy, like very few other series do.
This is a sequel to Lord of the White Hell.
Knowing this sequel would follow Elezar, Javier’s friend from the first 2 books, I didn’t expect much. I didn’t feel much for him from what we were shown previously. But this sequel ended up doing more than just blowing my socks off. Once again, I feel just as healed and shaken as LOTWH left me.
The story of Elezar and his witch lover Skellan is much bigger and way more ambitious than the previous story. At times I didn’t know if the magic could really be pulled off - but everything, all the magic and battles and magic battles were believable and at no point did I think ‘this is too corny’ which is sometimes the case with fantasy novels. No, this was good. So fucking good. I LOVED all the original concepts and just how far it went into wild imagination. I can't give it 5 stars because the pacing fell off track at times, but I’ll chalk that up to bad editing, not bad writing.
The timeframe takes place 5 years after LOTWH, and I was very skeptical about how Elezar’s story would go, considering his role in LOTWH. But being able to experience his journey and growth and healing was much better than if the sequel had been about Javier and Kiram, as much as I love them. Elezar and Skellan make such a unique and beautiful match I'm in tears as I write this. They had such good fresh chemistry, and fun interactions, and good honest love for each other. And Kiram + Javier show up in this sequel too! They aren't the main focus of course but yes they are there and are treated well.
Let me also talk about Skellan for a second. Besides loving his name, he has the best concept for a witch I've ever read. In fact, Ginn Hale is very good at writing characters that feel unique and real, and she crushes a lot of the boring tropes in the M/M genre. That is a huge reason why this series is so refreshing and brimming with high quality writing.
In short, everything felt good. This series made me so happy, like very few other series do.
Running With Scissors ★★★☆☆ by L.A. Witt - M/M Romance modern setting
Jude and A.J. are bandmates who are definitely not allowed to date each other, but love prevails.
This is a simple and casual read. The plot is unremarkable but the romance is cute and the sex was hot. I loved the roles they both settled in with their relationship, it felt good to read and was overall an enjoyable experience! loved the emphasis on how good and healthy communication is, I liked the main characters, and loved the chemistry. I just wish this book was a little longer!
Jude and A.J. are bandmates who are definitely not allowed to date each other, but love prevails.
This is a simple and casual read. The plot is unremarkable but the romance is cute and the sex was hot. I loved the roles they both settled in with their relationship, it felt good to read and was overall an enjoyable experience! loved the emphasis on how good and healthy communication is, I liked the main characters, and loved the chemistry. I just wish this book was a little longer!
shadow of the templar series by m. chandler - M/M modern setting
content warning(s):
HOMOPHOBIA, copious use of the f-slur, sexism
(this series is available for free on the official site, with extra content and m-rated scenes that were cut from the actual books)
Jeremy is an expert art thief, Simon is a high-ranking FBI agent. What more do I need to say? Well, a lot, as it turns out.
the morning star ★★★☆☆
This book felt like a mix of Hitman and MGS and I loved it. This is the shortest book in the series but it had the best pacing. I loved the stealth scenes, the action, the flirting, it was great! And it's a real shame that it all goes downhill from here, and so quickly it almost gave me whiplash. This book as a standalone is alright, but the following books are not at all worth it.
double down ★☆☆☆☆
Simon is a grade A asshole with temper issues and I hate him. Jeremy is still and always will be a delight, but its not very fun reading a series where you completely hate the main character. Simon isn't even a fun asshole character. He's rude solely for the sake of being rude and if I had a dollar for every time he calls Jeremy the f-slur to degrade him, I could eat at wendy’s every day for a month. Every time he says it I am physically revolted. Why this female author thought it was ok to make him say it that many times without it being challenged will never make sense to me. But she also wrote a violent dubcon scene so maybe its a simple as this is a bad book and Simon is reprehensible. There was a cool scene near the end where someone kind of important dies but everything else is bad.
with a bullet ☆☆☆☆☆
Well I had my hopes up high with the start of this one because Simon gets sidelined for a while and the focus shifted to his other team members, and I thought maybe that would be the thing that saved this series. Boy was I wrong! It felt like the equivalent of dragging my body through a 10-meter-deep pit of mud. The most interesting plot points were flashbacks. Otherwise nothing happened and it constantly felt like a chore to get through one more chapter. Johnny was actually a pretty cool character, but the focus was more on Mike who is arguably worse than Simon. I ended up getting to the very end of chapter 49 before I finally broke down and shed a few tears in frustration. I'm dropping this series for being too boring and too homophobic.
Jeremy is an expert art thief, Simon is a high-ranking FBI agent. What more do I need to say? Well, a lot, as it turns out.
the morning star ★★★☆☆
This book felt like a mix of Hitman and MGS and I loved it. This is the shortest book in the series but it had the best pacing. I loved the stealth scenes, the action, the flirting, it was great! And it's a real shame that it all goes downhill from here, and so quickly it almost gave me whiplash. This book as a standalone is alright, but the following books are not at all worth it.
double down ★☆☆☆☆
Simon is a grade A asshole with temper issues and I hate him. Jeremy is still and always will be a delight, but its not very fun reading a series where you completely hate the main character. Simon isn't even a fun asshole character. He's rude solely for the sake of being rude and if I had a dollar for every time he calls Jeremy the f-slur to degrade him, I could eat at wendy’s every day for a month. Every time he says it I am physically revolted. Why this female author thought it was ok to make him say it that many times without it being challenged will never make sense to me. But she also wrote a violent dubcon scene so maybe its a simple as this is a bad book and Simon is reprehensible. There was a cool scene near the end where someone kind of important dies but everything else is bad.
with a bullet ☆☆☆☆☆
Well I had my hopes up high with the start of this one because Simon gets sidelined for a while and the focus shifted to his other team members, and I thought maybe that would be the thing that saved this series. Boy was I wrong! It felt like the equivalent of dragging my body through a 10-meter-deep pit of mud. The most interesting plot points were flashbacks. Otherwise nothing happened and it constantly felt like a chore to get through one more chapter. Johnny was actually a pretty cool character, but the focus was more on Mike who is arguably worse than Simon. I ended up getting to the very end of chapter 49 before I finally broke down and shed a few tears in frustration. I'm dropping this series for being too boring and too homophobic.
wicked gentlemen ★☆☆☆☆ by ginn hale - M/M fantasy mystery
From the very start this book felt stiff. It's not that it was essentially bad it just felt awkward and for the most part I was bored. The characters had very little exposition, and I couldn't feel anything about the plot because there was hardly anything to work with. Which is a shame, because I like the premise of a corrupt inquisitor getting together with a literal demon. I like it a lot. But I had to keep calling on parts of my imagination to fill gaps and make the book more enjoyable, and that's not what i want to do when I sit down with a fully published book. I want to lose my myself in books, not get constantly distracted by ideas of how it could've been better.
It's a pretty quick read and I was at least thankful for that. But I think Lord of the White Hell set the bar way too high for what to expect from Ginn Hale.
From the very start this book felt stiff. It's not that it was essentially bad it just felt awkward and for the most part I was bored. The characters had very little exposition, and I couldn't feel anything about the plot because there was hardly anything to work with. Which is a shame, because I like the premise of a corrupt inquisitor getting together with a literal demon. I like it a lot. But I had to keep calling on parts of my imagination to fill gaps and make the book more enjoyable, and that's not what i want to do when I sit down with a fully published book. I want to lose my myself in books, not get constantly distracted by ideas of how it could've been better.
It's a pretty quick read and I was at least thankful for that. But I think Lord of the White Hell set the bar way too high for what to expect from Ginn Hale.
aristotle and dante discover the secrets of the universe ★★★★★ by benjamin sáenz - M/M YA
content warning(s):
homophobia, murder of an off-screen unnamed trans person, underage drug and alcohol use
This book is a treasure. I don't know how else to put it. It has a lot to say for itself, a lot of feelings to give - some complicated, some simple. I think its a very personal book. It's just, a lot to take in. And I think everyone can take their own things from it. I struggled with reading the family parts, especially about how people can try to entirely erase a family member because of one thing they did, and go on with their lives pretending they are dead. That hits too close to home! But no matter how hard they try, someone will still remember them. And that was nice. This book is very nice.
all for the game (3 book series) ★★★★★ by nora sakavic - eventual M/M, with sports team building, drama, trauma, and recovery
content warning(s):
drug and alcohol use, r*pe, self harm mentions + scars
I've read this series three times. But I've never been able to write a proper review because its hard to put into words just how much it means to me. At a glance, the premise is sort of ridiculous. Nora Sakavic made up her own fictional sport and wrote an entire series about that sport, while also including mafia drama, trauma, and gay slowburn romance.
My expectations were extremely low when I started this series the first time, but as soon as I jumped in, I was hooked. And its still my favorite series on this page as I'm editing this in 2020.
My expectations were extremely low when I started this series the first time, but as soon as I jumped in, I was hooked. And its still my favorite series on this page as I'm editing this in 2020.
five minutes longer ★☆☆☆☆ by victoria sue - M/M
I would have dropped this book real quick if I was a quitter. But I pushed through to the end and all I can say is that it wasn't fun. Maybe it's my fault for wanting a spicy cop romance, but this was about as spicy as a cucumber. The plot was boring and the characters were flat.
I would have dropped this book real quick if I was a quitter. But I pushed through to the end and all I can say is that it wasn't fun. Maybe it's my fault for wanting a spicy cop romance, but this was about as spicy as a cucumber. The plot was boring and the characters were flat.
down ★★★★☆ by ally blue - M/M sci-fi suspense horror
I was super excited to read this book after falling in love with Soma (2015), the deepsea sci-fi horror game that changed my life. I won't be comparing the two titles but if you liked Soma, Down is worth checking out!
The story takes place in a mining facility 7,000 meters below the ocean’s surface. A group of scientists come down to the facility to check out a mysterious object. One of the miners, Maximo Rees, has a one night stand with the lead scientist, and soon after things start to get freaky.
I usually prefer slow burn romance but the fast-paced natural connection between Mo and his scientist Armin was fun and cute in its own way. There were only 2 things about this book that felt lacking - It didn't quite hit all the right places with suspense. Some parts were glossed-over, which I felt skipped good opportunities to turn the horror up a few more degrees. But I still had a good time. It was just more of a steady progressive horror rather than a thriller. Easy to stomach, and not as grotesque as I was hoping for.
The other thing is a very small personal gripe but there were hardly any physical descriptors for the characters, which made them hard to visualize and differentiate, especially because I'm bad with names.
But overall it was a cool journey. I liked the ending, and I definitely want more deepsea sci-fi/horror.
I was super excited to read this book after falling in love with Soma (2015), the deepsea sci-fi horror game that changed my life. I won't be comparing the two titles but if you liked Soma, Down is worth checking out!
The story takes place in a mining facility 7,000 meters below the ocean’s surface. A group of scientists come down to the facility to check out a mysterious object. One of the miners, Maximo Rees, has a one night stand with the lead scientist, and soon after things start to get freaky.
I usually prefer slow burn romance but the fast-paced natural connection between Mo and his scientist Armin was fun and cute in its own way. There were only 2 things about this book that felt lacking - It didn't quite hit all the right places with suspense. Some parts were glossed-over, which I felt skipped good opportunities to turn the horror up a few more degrees. But I still had a good time. It was just more of a steady progressive horror rather than a thriller. Easy to stomach, and not as grotesque as I was hoping for.
The other thing is a very small personal gripe but there were hardly any physical descriptors for the characters, which made them hard to visualize and differentiate, especially because I'm bad with names.
But overall it was a cool journey. I liked the ending, and I definitely want more deepsea sci-fi/horror.
lord of the white hell ★★★★★ by ginn hale - M/M fantasy romance
(i’ll be treating both books as one complete story)
lord of the white hell is a series that brings back the nostalgia of reading books about boys being boys at a distant academy (‘a separate peace’ comes to mind). studying, competing in fencing tourneys, and occasionally visiting home. except this time there are 2 boys helplessly in love, and they have to work together to break a magical curse while sneaking kisses and dancing secretly (romantically) in each other’s arms under the moonlight.
its just so pure and clean. all of it. even though Javier and Kiram face many hardships including religious homophobia from Javier’s culture and the political pressure that Javier can’t be with a man (at age 18 he has little remaining family and must be the duke of Rauma), they stay devoted to each other. they always choose to be with each other as if there’s no other possible option and thats love. young love, sure. but its one of the best examples of gay love i’ve ever read.
ginn hale just writes them so well. it feels so real and fresh and good i feel like a new man. like i can never go back to anything that isnt up to this standard. i want to write a personal letter to ginn hale to thank her for this improvement to my life.
the actual plot of White Hell was a little dull at times but not quite boring. without a doubt the shining moments that will stay with me are the romance scenes between Kiram and Javier. and there was no shortage of those fun and precious moments. so i guess as a result the overall plot paled a little in comparison. but it was still nice enough. i enjoyed the contrast Kiram’s Haldiim culture brought to Javier’s Cadeleonian culture. gay love was normalized with Kiram’s people. which was comforting after having to read about Javier’s culture; being lead by something resembling real life european religions. i think i liked the plot of book one a little better as the setting primarily took place at the academy. which i found amusing, and i thrive on mutual pining.
all throughout both books i kept fearing that it would not end well, that somehow they wouldnt be allowed to be together but rest assured it has a happy and wholesome ending.
(i’ll be treating both books as one complete story)
lord of the white hell is a series that brings back the nostalgia of reading books about boys being boys at a distant academy (‘a separate peace’ comes to mind). studying, competing in fencing tourneys, and occasionally visiting home. except this time there are 2 boys helplessly in love, and they have to work together to break a magical curse while sneaking kisses and dancing secretly (romantically) in each other’s arms under the moonlight.
its just so pure and clean. all of it. even though Javier and Kiram face many hardships including religious homophobia from Javier’s culture and the political pressure that Javier can’t be with a man (at age 18 he has little remaining family and must be the duke of Rauma), they stay devoted to each other. they always choose to be with each other as if there’s no other possible option and thats love. young love, sure. but its one of the best examples of gay love i’ve ever read.
ginn hale just writes them so well. it feels so real and fresh and good i feel like a new man. like i can never go back to anything that isnt up to this standard. i want to write a personal letter to ginn hale to thank her for this improvement to my life.
the actual plot of White Hell was a little dull at times but not quite boring. without a doubt the shining moments that will stay with me are the romance scenes between Kiram and Javier. and there was no shortage of those fun and precious moments. so i guess as a result the overall plot paled a little in comparison. but it was still nice enough. i enjoyed the contrast Kiram’s Haldiim culture brought to Javier’s Cadeleonian culture. gay love was normalized with Kiram’s people. which was comforting after having to read about Javier’s culture; being lead by something resembling real life european religions. i think i liked the plot of book one a little better as the setting primarily took place at the academy. which i found amusing, and i thrive on mutual pining.
all throughout both books i kept fearing that it would not end well, that somehow they wouldnt be allowed to be together but rest assured it has a happy and wholesome ending.
the high king’s golden tongue ★★☆☆☆ by megan derr - M/M political fantasy romance
i think my main issue with this book is that the details were in the wrong places. i wish there was as much detail put into the romance as there was about each character’s outfit. i dont mind knowing the colors of every component of every single one of allen’s outfits, but i do mind when that part of the book is more rich than the relationship progression between the main love interests.
it attempts to be a novel set in the twisting politics of many nations but it lacks substance. its not enough to run off a hundred different names of seemingly important figures when they get no elaboration or personalities. its not enough to hint at vast world building when cultural content is withheld and left me feeling no connection to the plot. it felt like this book was all words and no heart. i wanted world building and politics but i feel like all i got was empty air with this book.
i did enjoy the complete lack of homophobia, and what it tried to be but it just didnt make it. and i really wanted to know more about one particular ‘intentionally androgynous’ character but they only got one line of introduction, and then made no other appearance or mention. overall its not a bad book, it had its good moments, but otherwise it was bland in every aspect.
i think my main issue with this book is that the details were in the wrong places. i wish there was as much detail put into the romance as there was about each character’s outfit. i dont mind knowing the colors of every component of every single one of allen’s outfits, but i do mind when that part of the book is more rich than the relationship progression between the main love interests.
it attempts to be a novel set in the twisting politics of many nations but it lacks substance. its not enough to run off a hundred different names of seemingly important figures when they get no elaboration or personalities. its not enough to hint at vast world building when cultural content is withheld and left me feeling no connection to the plot. it felt like this book was all words and no heart. i wanted world building and politics but i feel like all i got was empty air with this book.
i did enjoy the complete lack of homophobia, and what it tried to be but it just didnt make it. and i really wanted to know more about one particular ‘intentionally androgynous’ character but they only got one line of introduction, and then made no other appearance or mention. overall its not a bad book, it had its good moments, but otherwise it was bland in every aspect.
The Edda Of Burdens Series by Elizabeth Bear - M/M + M/F Adult Norse Fantasy
content warning(s):
sexual abuse, continuous rape, suicide attempt, Heythe’s character in general
I was advised to read this series in chronological order instead of published order, and i agree with that. because theres a lot of important worldbuilding and character development in the prequel. i dont know how anyone could be expected to start with Windwracked Stars without knowing all there is to know from Mountain Bound.
By The Mountain Bound ★★★★★
this is a book about sword-wielding star children. they are angels of light, called einherjar and waelcyrge. but one of star-children doesnt exactly fit in. he wasn’t born from the sea like the rest. he became an einherjar when he ate the sun of a previous world. this is Mingan, the Gray Wolf, Suneater. he is an outcast. and his secret lover is the highly respected and admired war-leader Strifbjorn. one night a strange woman washes up on the beach, and begins the end of the star children.
this book is beautiful. absolutely captivating. the storytelling, the settings and the scenes, the characters, the rich descriptions, the love between Mingan and Strifbjorn, its all incredibly vivid and full of feeling. and the writing style is lovely. elizabeth bear pushes the imagination to surprising satisfaction, and i want more of it. i love the individuality and realness of the characters in this book, even though they are not human they are relatable (in their ways of love and their flaws) and i loved Mingan from the very first page to the last. he’s an outcast, he has a big heart, and tries to do the right things, but makes mistakes. he’s flawed, he’s bad at times, but i connect with him and i love him.
i also didnt expect his relationship with Strifbjorn to run so deep. it made my knees weak, and my heart tender, and my eyes wet. definitely one of my favorite relationships out of every book ive read so far. the hair combing scene keeps me warm and full of bittersweet pain.
the ending is sad but please dont let it discourage you, All The Windwracked Stars makes it a little more bearable. lets all be thankful for magic.
All the Windwracked Stars ★★★☆☆
I still love Mingan. I was a little disappointed that he shows up less in this book. a lot less, actually. instead its mainly focused on Muire. she’s cool and all, and i like her as an independent character, but the M/F stuff in this book really made me a very sad boy. especially with the allusion that Muire had ‘won over’ a bi guy. there’s been some moments, even in Mountain Bound, that felt homophobic. and it makes me wary because the author doesn’t really make it clear if thats just an attribute of this fantasy world, or something more personal. but anyway, I was really hoping for a polyamorous relationship to blossom with the main 3 but that never happens :( The setting is a very interesting change from Mountain Bound, I liked the addition of animal-people, and the heavy changes the planet went through. Overall an interesting entry in the series but lacks healthy m/m content.
The Sea Thy Mistress ★★☆☆☆
I’m writing this as my cheeks are still wet with tears from the ending but surprisingly they are good tears this time. Truthfully I lost faith in how this series would end many times throughout this book. As such, i’m torn about how to rate it or how to recommend it. I thoroughly enjoyed Mountain Bound, despite the abuse and manipulation, because I thought it would get better. It didn’t. Somehow the third and final book had even more of it with the return of a certain antagonist. A few times I dreaded picking this book back up to continue reading it because things just kept getting worse and it wasn’t enjoyable. And then, ¾ of the way through, at the peak of the worst of it, things took a dramatic turn for the better with Mingan and Cahey’s 2nd scene in the chapel and I was reminded of why I still can say I love this series. Sadly, its often not a fun read. Even for me, someone who eats up tragedies, sexual abuse is something I’ll never be able to put up with or tolerate decently. That’s why I’ll honestly say i’m disappointed in this series, but it is the only reason. Everything else, the plot, setting, characters, style and ultimate ending, were amazing. It would have been everything I ever wanted if not for.. the antagonist. But i’ll take my losses. On the very last page, Mingan gets his happy end. Which made it all worth it to me. What can I say, I’m a sucker for happy endings. Especially with the books I read for this list. You never know what you’re gonna get, so I tend to hold endings like this very close to my heart.
The Culling ★★☆☆☆ by Steven Dos Santos - M/M Sci-Fi Fantasy (YA Dystopian)
this book is pretty much a gay hunger games. i didnt find the writing style to be anything special or incredible, and unfortunately the dialogue felt weak and awkward in some parts. even so i found this amusing (only because ive suffered thru the hunger games), and read most of it in one day. i will be reading the sequel soon. i tried out the sequel but it was too corny i couldnt handle it. i flipped through it and gave up :( it might be good for younger readers but im going to try to avoid YA from now on.
this book is pretty much a gay hunger games. i didnt find the writing style to be anything special or incredible, and unfortunately the dialogue felt weak and awkward in some parts. even so i found this amusing (only because ive suffered thru the hunger games), and read most of it in one day. i will be reading the sequel soon. i tried out the sequel but it was too corny i couldnt handle it. i flipped through it and gave up :( it might be good for younger readers but im going to try to avoid YA from now on.
The Magic Metal Dragons Series by Danielle Bennett and Jaida Jones - Fantasy w various gay characters and one (1) trans character
content warning(s):
homophobia, transphobia (book 4)
Havemercy ★★★★☆ | Shadow Magic ★★★★★ | Dragon Soul ★★★☆☆ | Steelhands ★★★★☆
each book in this series is told through the alternating POVs of four characters. So, that's 16 main characters total. Havemercy had an m/m romance, Shadow Magic had two m/m friendships and no romance (but im 100% convinced Caius and Alcibiades got together post-canon), Dragon Soul had a trans woman main character, and Steelhands had an m/f engaged couple but it was arranged by their parents and Toverre is very gay.
in this series there are magic metal dragons. but i dont think its fair to say they are the key point, because i had hoped they would’ve played a bigger part in each of the books. however, the dragons were hardly mentioned in Book 2 (Shadow Magic) at all but its still my favorite book in the series because of the characters. and speaking of characters, there are a lot of them! its almost overwhelming at first. when the Dragon Corps were formally introduced in the first book i nearly cried because of how many names i had to remember, but i think unique and realistic characters are the strong point of this series. once you pass that initial hurdle of introductions its all smooth sailing.
i would describe these books as 90% character interaction and 10% plot, which might discourage some from reading them, but i was only bored by one character in the whole series (Madoka from Dragon Soul) which is impressive considering how hefty the cast is. i was satisfied by the depth and focus on the characters i loved, and i loved a lot of characters!
The Hexslinger Series by Gemma Files - M/M Mature Dark Horror Fantasy (F/F in book 3 with side characters. Also a canon polyamorous family)
content warning(s):
explicit gore and sex, sexual abuse/assault/rape, sexual manipulation, time period specific racism, homophobia
A Book of Tongues ★★★★★ | A Rope of Thorns ★★★★☆ | A Tree of Bones ★★★★☆
i almost didnt read this series, because of it being set in the wild west, which didnt interest me in the slightest but curiosity got the better of me and im so glad because hoo boy. this is my 2nd favorite series out of everything on this entire page. essentially its about Hexes and black magic and Aztec gods. ex-revered Asher Rook and his lover Chess Pargeter are the main characters. They are a villainous duo, and that makes this a messy and painful ride. Rook is a Hex, and because he used to be a Reverend, he uses the bible and the words of god for his evil deeds. Chess is endlessly amused by this, as was i, being a fellow god-hating queer. Chess himself is notorious for being quick to fire his guns and merciless with murder, and i love him. very very much. he’s fiery and morally bad and has a dirty mouth. which is a delicious contrast to the intricate imagery and beautiful vocabulary of the poetic prose Gemma Files is so good at. i love Rook just as much. getting to know him was a trip alright, and one that i thoroughly enjoyed.
books 2 and 3 are slower paced and more straight-forward in what is going on. this makes them easier to understand, but some of the momentum of the first book is lost. thats why im tacking a star off each of them. but i really love this series. i wasnt expecting the themes to touch on the idea that Love Is Not A Weakness and redemption is possible no matter how far you’ve fallen. i’ll be thinking about this series, specifically about Ash and Chess and that god damn heartbreaking ending, for many many years to come.
(this series is not for minors)
The Left Hand Of Darkness ★★★★☆ by Ursula K. Le Guin - Sci-fi with a genderfluid-ish species of humans
this book isnt so much queer as it is an interesting read on an alien species of humans from a distant planet. these humans remain completely androgynous and genderless until their ‘kemmer’ cycles start once a month, in which they can then develop into one sex or the other, if they are with a partner who is also in kemmering. its basically a mating cycle. but every single person on this planet can become either a man or woman when in kemmer. the plot is about an ambassador, Genly Ai, who comes to this planet in hopes of joining it with an intergalactic peace union. this helps us get an outsider’s view on the interesting society. there are politics involved, but i enjoyed the 2nd half of the book very much, because thats when we get a very lengthy and fun experience with the planet itself, which is in an extreme ice age. there is no romance in this book but there is a strong bond formed between Genly and a native of the planet. i really enjoyed getting immersed in this foreign world!
this book isnt so much queer as it is an interesting read on an alien species of humans from a distant planet. these humans remain completely androgynous and genderless until their ‘kemmer’ cycles start once a month, in which they can then develop into one sex or the other, if they are with a partner who is also in kemmering. its basically a mating cycle. but every single person on this planet can become either a man or woman when in kemmer. the plot is about an ambassador, Genly Ai, who comes to this planet in hopes of joining it with an intergalactic peace union. this helps us get an outsider’s view on the interesting society. there are politics involved, but i enjoyed the 2nd half of the book very much, because thats when we get a very lengthy and fun experience with the planet itself, which is in an extreme ice age. there is no romance in this book but there is a strong bond formed between Genly and a native of the planet. i really enjoyed getting immersed in this foreign world!
Bone Dance ★★☆☆☆ by Emma Bull - Gender Neutral Character
so, this book is really fucking weird. but thats not why i didnt like it. the plot, in fact, is interesting and the conversations about neutral gender were good imo. this book loves to have a vague plot though, so i’ll respect that and not talk much about it, but the vague-ness is unfortunately what made me not like it at first. the first 1/3 of the book made no sense and i didnt know what i was reading but i think that was intended and i personally didnt find that to be very enjoyable. it does get more fun once things finally start to make sense, but i also found the writing style to be a little tedious in some parts. there were also many movie references, and since im an uncultured heathen, they went right over my head. im positive i was not the intended audience for this book (its subtitle is ‘a fantasy for technophiles’, and i am definitely not one of those.), but for being the only book with a neutrois character ive had the pleasure of reading so far, its not bad. and just a heads up, it doesnt actually become apparent that the protagonist is neutrois until 1/3 of the book in. i thought i had been lied to up until that point, but i assure you, Sparrow is very much as neutral as can be.
so, this book is really fucking weird. but thats not why i didnt like it. the plot, in fact, is interesting and the conversations about neutral gender were good imo. this book loves to have a vague plot though, so i’ll respect that and not talk much about it, but the vague-ness is unfortunately what made me not like it at first. the first 1/3 of the book made no sense and i didnt know what i was reading but i think that was intended and i personally didnt find that to be very enjoyable. it does get more fun once things finally start to make sense, but i also found the writing style to be a little tedious in some parts. there were also many movie references, and since im an uncultured heathen, they went right over my head. im positive i was not the intended audience for this book (its subtitle is ‘a fantasy for technophiles’, and i am definitely not one of those.), but for being the only book with a neutrois character ive had the pleasure of reading so far, its not bad. and just a heads up, it doesnt actually become apparent that the protagonist is neutrois until 1/3 of the book in. i thought i had been lied to up until that point, but i assure you, Sparrow is very much as neutral as can be.
The Captive Prince Series by C.S.Pacat - M/M Mature fiction
content warning(s):
sexual slavery, csa, all types of abuse, pedophilia (not glorified), war, suicide
Captive Prince ★★☆☆☆ | Prince’s Gambit ★★★★★ | King’s Rising ★★★★★
book 1 made me want to throw up on at least 3 different occasions. its torture porn. besides that, i do love these books. i fucking love Damen. hands down he is my favorite character from any book ever. the series follows the events of him, the prince of Akielos, and Laurent the prince of Vere. these two countries are not on good terms, and book one opens with Damen being captured in a ploy for the throne, and shipped to Vere as a pleasure slave and cruel joke. this is the worst part of the series, as its very difficult to get through the horrible treatment he was put though. its definitely a steep hurdle.
but he gets himself out, to a safer environment and the tone of the books changes drastically with the start of book 2. this is when the trust building and friendship begins. antics ensue. there is war, graphic battles, savage politics, social games, and heartwrecking soul-cleansing romance. these books tore me apart, absolutely ripped me to shreds, and in my weakness they filled me with light, and warmth, and unbelievably sweet tenderness.
book one is definitely a nightmare, i will never deny that. but imo the series should be consumed as a whole to understand the intended themes and direction. it feels more like one book split into 3 parts than 3 separate books. the books are certainly short enough to be consumed quickly.
(this series is not for minors)
Swordspoint ★★★★☆ by Ellen Kushner - M/M fiction
Richard St. Vier is a swordsman, the best in town, and he kills with both incredible skill and style. he’s alluring, and he has a boyfriend. there are other characters too but none of them really shine in comparison to Richard. there are a few power plays from nobles as the plot, and they arent really interesting until richard gets caught up in it. but all of the swordfights are cool and energetic. i love swords so i had a good time, and the main gay relationship feels organic and real. the extra story at the end kind of fucked me up a little.
there are additional books, but im not really interested in any characters besides Alec and Richard, so I spent half an hour flipping through ‘The Privilege Of The Sword’ and I think i’m finished with this series.
Richard St. Vier is a swordsman, the best in town, and he kills with both incredible skill and style. he’s alluring, and he has a boyfriend. there are other characters too but none of them really shine in comparison to Richard. there are a few power plays from nobles as the plot, and they arent really interesting until richard gets caught up in it. but all of the swordfights are cool and energetic. i love swords so i had a good time, and the main gay relationship feels organic and real. the extra story at the end kind of fucked me up a little.
there are additional books, but im not really interested in any characters besides Alec and Richard, so I spent half an hour flipping through ‘The Privilege Of The Sword’ and I think i’m finished with this series.
Proxy ★★★★☆ / Guardian ★★★★☆ by Alex London - M/M YA fiction
another dystopian YA about a system which forces poor kids (proxies) to be punished for their assigned guardian’s crimes. the guardians are rich kids, who are reckless and generally dont care for the consequences of their actions. book one is about Syd, a proxy, and the relationship he has with his guardian. also general societal downfall, because we cant forget the dystopian aspect. i cried at the end of book one and i still think about the ending of book 2 to this day. the writing is nothing remarkable, because it is YA, but i enjoyed it a lot and it touched my heart.
another dystopian YA about a system which forces poor kids (proxies) to be punished for their assigned guardian’s crimes. the guardians are rich kids, who are reckless and generally dont care for the consequences of their actions. book one is about Syd, a proxy, and the relationship he has with his guardian. also general societal downfall, because we cant forget the dystopian aspect. i cried at the end of book one and i still think about the ending of book 2 to this day. the writing is nothing remarkable, because it is YA, but i enjoyed it a lot and it touched my heart.
Coda ★★★★☆ / Chorus ★★★☆☆ by Emma Trevayne - M/F (minor side M/M) SciFi Cyberpunk YA
This series is about ‘weird music’ that acts exactly like drugs. the government is corrupt, and some people just want their pure non-drug music back, because its illegal to make clean tunes. i quickly fell in love with Anthem, the protagonist of the 1st book. unfortunately the main romance is M/F but i did still enjoy it a whole lot (which is rare, but i honestly do love Haven). Anthem is bi/pan however and there is a side gay couple but its nothing to get excited about. book 2 has no gayness as far as i can remember but there is a very minor character who i think is supposed to be a trans girl but only if you squint. i dont remember much about book two’s plot, really. but its worth reading for Anthem alone, and the descriptions of drug-laced songs. im also a fan of this author in general.
This series is about ‘weird music’ that acts exactly like drugs. the government is corrupt, and some people just want their pure non-drug music back, because its illegal to make clean tunes. i quickly fell in love with Anthem, the protagonist of the 1st book. unfortunately the main romance is M/F but i did still enjoy it a whole lot (which is rare, but i honestly do love Haven). Anthem is bi/pan however and there is a side gay couple but its nothing to get excited about. book 2 has no gayness as far as i can remember but there is a very minor character who i think is supposed to be a trans girl but only if you squint. i dont remember much about book two’s plot, really. but its worth reading for Anthem alone, and the descriptions of drug-laced songs. im also a fan of this author in general.
Witch Eyes Series by Scott Tracey - M/M Fantasy
Witch Eyes ☆☆☆☆☆ | Demon Eyes ☆☆☆☆☆ | Phantom Eyes ☆☆☆☆☆
im putting this series here to say one thing: stay away from it. dont even try, its a waste of time. the whole thing was grueling and i kept hoping for it to get better. but it didnt, the ending felt like a big ‘fuck you’ for sitting through 3 boring impersonal and dull books. also the gay romance felt uncomfortable and emotionless and i kept thinking it was going to stay one-sided but it didnt, even though the other guy gives no indication of having feelings even though they kiss and stuff and technically end up together??? theres no chemistry and both of the boys are bland. theres nothing to like. i stuck with it for the lore, and to hope for something, SOMETHING interesting to happen, for the romance to pick up, for rich character development, and got none of that. its a bad time.
Witch Eyes ☆☆☆☆☆ | Demon Eyes ☆☆☆☆☆ | Phantom Eyes ☆☆☆☆☆
im putting this series here to say one thing: stay away from it. dont even try, its a waste of time. the whole thing was grueling and i kept hoping for it to get better. but it didnt, the ending felt like a big ‘fuck you’ for sitting through 3 boring impersonal and dull books. also the gay romance felt uncomfortable and emotionless and i kept thinking it was going to stay one-sided but it didnt, even though the other guy gives no indication of having feelings even though they kiss and stuff and technically end up together??? theres no chemistry and both of the boys are bland. theres nothing to like. i stuck with it for the lore, and to hope for something, SOMETHING interesting to happen, for the romance to pick up, for rich character development, and got none of that. its a bad time.
Parrotfish ★☆☆☆☆ by Ellen Wittlinger - Transmale MC
its an unrealistic YA coming out story thats supposed to be ~positive~ but its boring and i hate it and have been trying to block it out of my memory.
its an unrealistic YA coming out story thats supposed to be ~positive~ but its boring and i hate it and have been trying to block it out of my memory.
I Am J ★☆☆☆☆ by Cris Beam - Transmale MC
i did not like this book but its slightly more bearable than parrotfish. didnt like the main character’s attitude and the part where the MC has a romance with a girl who eats paint is really [looks at the camera like im in The Office] :/ its distasteful.
i did not like this book but its slightly more bearable than parrotfish. didnt like the main character’s attitude and the part where the MC has a romance with a girl who eats paint is really [looks at the camera like im in The Office] :/ its distasteful.